Aibu for calling her a racist?

[spiritofadventure]

Went out for a few pre christmas drinks with a group of close friends on Saturday night. Nobody was drunk and we had been out for maybe 1 hour when somehow, the conversation turned into a discussion about Trump.

One of my friends came out with 'Trump is going to change the world for the better' and then proceeded to have a good old rant about how 'blacks and mexicans' are responsible for 'all' the crime in America. I asked her what she was basing this on , to which she replied 'people should just stick to their own people and stay in their own countries'.

This comment left me open mouthed and furious! I am mixed race and 2 other friends in the group are from another European country.

I told her that I had no idea she had such controversial opinions and that i didn't want to carry on a conversation with a racist. And then I left.

We haven't spoken since, but I have spoken to other members of the group and have been told that she is 'deeply hurt' that I called her a racist and she wants an apology.

I stand by what I said and i don't want to apologise.

Aibu??

I have a colleague who my friend and colleague was friendly with so we'd get together for a chat while having a lunch in the canteen sometimes. She seemed pleasant enough, also a very tree-hugging Mother Earthly type.
Once our discussion got a bit political and she started having remarks about dirty immigrants and how they should drown etc. I was horrified and told her I find it difficult to talk to people who are this racist and far-right because I completely disagree with them.
She hasn't spoken to me ever since. I don't miss her.

Sorry for the auto correct! Meant to say “she’d like people to stay in their country of origin”.

However, I disagree with the university which apologised to students for alluding to a “white” campus, in terms of snow. Ummm, snow IS white. Unless it’s slushy grey or peed-on yellow.

Ah sorry assumed it was work.
Have your had a debrief with the mutual friends?
I suspect if they remain friends with her without backing you up that's gonna hurt.... x

"people should just stick to their own people and stay in their own countries"

A lot of the white supremicists in USA spout this line.
The irony that all us white folk are descended from Europeans who didn't "stay in our own country" is completely lost on them.

'x is really upset with you and is livid that you called her a racist in front of everyone. She just messaged me saying how can she be a racist when she is friends with you?'

'She is not friends with me any more, as I am not friends with racists. I hope that helps.'

I think hjgguygi8y86 that the statistics you mention actually say you are more likely to be CONVICTED of a crime if you are black. Rather than commit a crime. And Mexicans have more criminality because in a lot of case they are illegal immegrants and everything they do becomes illegal (even legal things like working, accessing healthcare).
I don’t think your point is very much the nice face of racism and I haven’t name changed to say that.

She's not a colleague or a work contact. We have been friends for a while and met through mutual friends.

Oh sorry, muddling ideas from different threads up. At least that makes it easier to avoid her like the plague.

It reminds me of the quote about a certain footballer: "He's not racist, he just likes saying racist things!"

Yanbu. She is a racist. I wouldn’t socialise with her either. Good for you.

Live & let live? Just because opinions differ does it really mean that you can never be friendly towards her again?
Am rather sick of this only one view is allowed society. You don't have to agree with her or even discuss it.
Gosh, you think we should allow racist views to be aired. Wonder what the hate crime laws represent...

hjgguy Nice racist manifesto there.

It is prejudiced to make sweeping statements about "all" the bad things come from specific communities. When you adjust for the relative poverty of different communities, there's about as much white crime as black or Mexican-American crime.

Just roll a nuclear bomb into the thread, why don't you, hjgguygi8y86.

Rich countries (like Australia, USA & UK) have an active policy to brain drain from everywhere else in the world. Our underlying economic strategy is not to train up all of our own skilled people but to recruit many from elsewhere. Immigration of skilled migrants is actively encouraged -- not "stay in your own country" policy at all.

Nope, do not apologise and never speak to her again.

Gilead hjgguy Nice racist manifesto there.
Why? What did I say that was racist?

OP, I am also from another European country and thank you for speaking on my behalf

YANBU she is racist. This is no case of live and let live because she clearly isnt interested in letting people from other cultures live in peace is she. Theres a difference between political opinion and hate speech. People not calling out racism because they want to 'respect' peoples different opinions are not really helping anyone imo. Its not a different political opinion its racism and its not acceptable.

I suppose I’d NC if I fancied being a GF too.

Why? What did I say that was racist?

Why the name change if you didn't think it was all racist?

So many aspersions and minimising in hjgguygi8y86's post I don't know where to begin.

hjgguygi8y86 Why the need to name change if you believe what you wrote in your post?

“I’m sorry you are a massive racist and upset that I pointed out your racist views make you a racist”. I’d send her that if I was up for a ruck.

Love the namechanging to post with great ignorance If you didn’t think your views were socially unacceptable you would post in your own name.

If you say racist things people will assume you are racist and probably not want to hang out with you. Can’t believe anyone doesn’t understand this! Yanbu op.

YANBU
Please do not apologise to her... if she doesn't want to be called racist then she shouldn't hold racist views. You have done nothing wrong
I would be mortified if someone said this to me and would also give them a piece of my mind ... I married outside my race (happily for 8 years) and my little 11 week old daughter is the most beautiful thing in the world .. (of course I'm going to say that ) .. one thing that worries me is her coming across people like this .. I just pray that no one will look down at her ... there's been times where some of my mixed race friends have been called mongrels because they aren't "pure bred" it's disgusting
Good for you for speaking up

SpartonDregs
Why? What did I say that was racist?
Why the name change if you didn't think it was all racist?

What a peculiar leap of logic. I NC because of the vitriol and nastiness from some posters any time somebody posts a different opinion to theirs. Already, Dovetailed has thrown in her usual GF comment and lljkk has decided to negatively interpret my comment as a nuclear bomb and seems to question my right to post on this thread and Gilead has said my post is a racist manifesto.

Why is my post goading, but none of yours are?
Why am I accused of writing a racist manifesto when I hold no racist views whatsoever and there are none in my post?
Why shouldn't I post an opinion on an AIBU that differs to others?

Have you any idea how nonsensical these reactions are? Just accusations without one drop of informative argument. If you think what I wrote is racist, quote the part that is racist and justify your accusation, don't assume or come out with all these one line descriptor attacks that have no thought or substance to them.