Aibu for calling her a racist?

[spiritofadventure]

Went out for a few pre christmas drinks with a group of close friends on Saturday night. Nobody was drunk and we had been out for maybe 1 hour when somehow, the conversation turned into a discussion about Trump.

One of my friends came out with 'Trump is going to change the world for the better' and then proceeded to have a good old rant about how 'blacks and mexicans' are responsible for 'all' the crime in America. I asked her what she was basing this on , to which she replied 'people should just stick to their own people and stay in their own countries'.

This comment left me open mouthed and furious! I am mixed race and 2 other friends in the group are from another European country.

I told her that I had no idea she had such controversial opinions and that i didn't want to carry on a conversation with a racist. And then I left.

We haven't spoken since, but I have spoken to other members of the group and have been told that she is 'deeply hurt' that I called her a racist and she wants an apology.

I stand by what I said and i don't want to apologise.

Aibu??

Oh dear. Just a lot of racism around at Xmas parties this year! 😂🙄
That message says it all. The old ‘I’m not racist I have black friends’ line. Good god. You’re well rid.

YANBU.

She's not just racist, she's an idiot. "People should stay in their own countries" - has she actually thought through the implications of what she's suggesting? The forcible repatriation of all white people in America to the European countries they came from, and the return of the land they appropriated to the native population they stole it from? (Not to mention the question of where you send someone whose heritage is mixed?) The whole idea of "white nations" and "black nations" and "hispanic nations" is so bloody muddled and relies on such a false conception of history, current geopolitics and human biology as to be just phenomenally stupid.

Shame on your friends for taking her side too.

Oh that's the classic isn't it: I can't be racist, I have a black/Asian/insert-ethnicity-here friend...

Just because opinions differ does it really mean that you can never be friendly towards her again?

I wouldn’t want to be friends or even associate with someone that holds views like the lady in OPs post.

What is it with work christmas dos at the moment. Mine always seem to be people moderatley depressed at crap pay rises, a shit overpriced meal and people worrying about trains home.

Classic, not friends anymore though! Let her be livid, she's embarrassed that she's been called out.

" She just messaged me saying how can she be a racist when she is friends with you?"

Good grief!

She should check her family tree - very few are British all the way back. So she should go back to where she came from.

I'd forget any notion of a friendship with her.
Don't engage, don't be drawn. Drop her like a scalding roast potato.

On another note, what is it about christmas that makes people racist; there's about 2/3 other threads that follow a similar pattern to this one

Considering every human alive today originated in Africa, it's an interesting proposition...

Also she's a thick racist C*

*NK493efc93X1277dd3d6d4

Live & let live? Just because opinions differ does it really mean that you can never be friendly towards her again?*

Why should a mixed race person be friends with someone who thinks “people should just stick with their own people”?

If she doesn’t want to be called a racist she shouldn't inflict her racist opinions on people.
This

Report back to your mutual friends that you are 'deeply hurt' and would like her to apologise to you for saying racist things.
And this.

I don’t want to be that guy but I will. I am seeing this more and more post trump post brexit. People are saying things that are outright racist. I have a horrible feeling they’ve been holding it in for years and now feel justified. The silent majority. I am hoping that it’s just a trend thing and people are not engaging their brain.
My friend did one of those genealogy DNA tests ready for some exciting results. She’s 99% Scottish/Irish and the other 1% is made up of England and Scandinavia. She’s bitterly disappointed and determined to shake up her gene pool.
You called your friend out for a racist statement. Hopefully she’ll have a good hard look at herself but I think you should hold your ground.

She is a racist. I wouldn't have anything to do with her either. Nor would I have much to do with any idiot trying to tell me otherwise.

YANBU
I wouldn't even be arsed getting in a discussion with them.

Everyone is entitled to a point of view, even Nigel Farage.
Doesn't mean they are right, or that we have to sit there and put up with it.

Demanding that a person who is affected by racist comment apologise to the racist starts bordering on even more dodgy ground.

Clearly a bunch of thickos. I'm sorry you were upset, better fewer friends than this lot.

I'd missed the stick to your own people thing. I'm also mixed race; who the fuck are my people?? That question nearly led to me having a breakdown when I was a teen. I didn't fit in anywhere!

She just messaged me saying how can she be a racist when she is friends with you?

Well, by her own definition, now she can be a racist because she is no longer friends with you.

If people don't call out racism when they see it then small comments pass, its assumed making racist comments is acceptable and normal, from there things can only get worse and undo years of campaigning and fighting for ALL people to be treated as equals.
Not only were you right to call her a racist and end the conversation, but you are well within your rights to explain to your 'friends' that if they support her unpalatable views then they are also people you don't want to associate with.
It is all too easy to stand by and let people say things so I applaud you for calling her out on this

yanbu

just leave it, you don't have to mix with her do you - not a professional contact or anything?

if it upsets the group then none of them are worth the bother really.

Good for you. She sounds thick

then proceeded to have a good old rant about how 'blacks and mexicans' are responsible for 'all' the crime in America.

It doesn't get more clear cut than that, does it?

Everyone really needs to stop drinking with colleagues, though 😏

She is racist and you called it out. Always amazes me how being called racist seems somehow worse than actually being one. To the racist, i mean.
Tell her you'll report her to your boss.
I'm sorry you had a crap evening with a racist.
xx

I'm just grateful I don't have to go through the torture of a work Christmas do .

She’s have like people to stay in their country or origin and stick to their own ethnicity? Well, we all of us originated in Africa. So, poor Africa would have sunk under the weight of our inhabitation now 😐

No, YANBU

She's not a colleague or a work contact. We have been friends for a while and met through mutual friends.

I have no plans to socialise with her again any time soon.