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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I don't like the tree

139 replies

inniu · 07/12/2017 08:47

Most years we go together as a family to pick the tree. This year DH suggested as we had a few things on and he had sometime off work he would get it himself.

I don't like it at all. It is slightly shorter but much much narrower than any tree we have ever had. When it was delivered my reaction wasn't great. I looked at it and said "it is very small"
DH is taking it very personally and was very upset with me which I was really surprised about. We have made up since but I still don't like the tree.

For context, I work part time and do 95% of the Christmas organising so I may be used to doing things a certain way.

I really still want to get another tree. AIBU

OP posts:
RidingWindhorses · 07/12/2017 11:26

He tried to help and the first thing you do is criticise

Aw bless hes not a functioning adult, he's just a ickle child who tried to help mummy. Men can't be expected to pull their weight 50:50, take responsibilty for household chores such as buying Christmas trees and select an appropriate one.

Why is carrying out ordinary domestic duties regarded as 'help'?

RidingWindhorses · 07/12/2017 11:26

Now that's a tree, Walker

CrochetBelle · 07/12/2017 11:27

Walker thank you for the picture of your erection.

OP How different is it from the usual style if you're worrying about being able to use even some of the decorations?

Zadig · 07/12/2017 11:29

OP was the tree in that net packaging when it came? If not just take it back. Once it's decorated your DH will forget what it was like in the first place.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 07/12/2017 11:29

Wow Walker That's a whopper. I hope you don't work from home. That desk area behind now looks a bit redundant.

Loving the bauble references Grin Nothing worse than tired old low hanging ones.
Yours is crying out for some supersized balls Walker.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 07/12/2017 11:30

Basseting. Would it save you a few quid to get the kids to make their own decorations for your tree? Paper snowflakes, little boxes wrapped in Christmas paper even gingerbread men, that sort of thing.

We still have a few homemade decorations lurking from when times were tougher and, now things are better, they always bring a smile.

Original poster
inniu · 07/12/2017 11:33

Sorry I haven't be able to read all replies. I am at work. For the same reason I don't have photos.
Usually the children would have a big input into choosing the tree. I would remind them of the ceiling height but they would compare which one was fullest, had the most even branches etc.
DH travels a huge amount with work usually so I just get on with things. Having him around more and more involved is probably an adjustment all round.

It never occurred to me that a man would take a comment on the size of a tree as being about the size of anything else. I don't really think he did.

We never usually argue like that so it was a shock but I will just live with the smaller tree.

OP posts:
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 07/12/2017 11:35

Yeah good idea Tinkly I read that you can cut an orange up thinly and cook the slices in the oven until hard and use as tree decoration with a bit of ribbon? Also pine cones with a bit of glitter look good.

You have my sympathy Basset. I got the decs down from our loft one year and rats had got in and chewed everything, even holes in the blooming stockings! Sad It's so annoying and expensive to try to replace everything.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 07/12/2017 11:38

Glad you're making the best of the tiny tree inniu
Would love a pic of the finished tree when you get back and we'll critique.. Smile

TheMaddHugger · 07/12/2017 11:42

yayyyyy the Tree has a good home for Xmas after all

I love a good happy Ending Grin

I don't like the tree
Walkerbean16 · 07/12/2017 11:43

ilostit haha I'm going to have to relocate the desk somewhere, no idea where! Ive already had to rehome the baby swing and a jumperoo. I normally get a 6ft but the guy only had 7ft ones left, i thought 12 inches wouldn't make that much difference!

Basseting · 07/12/2017 11:48

Tinkly thank you. I cant do anything remotely edible or I will be even more overrun. Home made paper decs will be nice (and fun to make).
ILost I think the buggers might try citrus but should baulk at pine?
I stuck up a different 'Help' thread and have had some good ideas:
paperchains, foraged foliage, plain white candles etc.
I've found some basic white lights on Amazon, 3 strings for £10 (inc delivery) I have a tree and I have loads of white paper. A pritstick and some glitter/cotton wool and we are good to go for a minimalist white/ oldfashioned Christmas. The White Co, eat your heart out... (more mouse pie, anyone?) Xmas Smile

OP -Sorry you were sad about tree but you have started a great thread with all the double entendres causing festive mirth - for me anyway! Xmas Grin

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 07/12/2017 11:56

Ah good luck with it Basset. I haven't tried the cooked orange thing. I wonder if you'd have to cook them for hours and your house might stink of burnt orange for 5 years afterwards. Confused Sounds like you have some good ideas.

Among the crap, some of the decs in our local poundshop is fairly decent. I got a couple of strings of white led lights in there!
Hope the mouse situation can be resolved.

Glad OP is embracing her dh's slightly smaller one.

Star #give a thin unwanted tree a home. Star

liquidrevolution · 07/12/2017 12:26

@Bassett - popcorn, threaded on cotton with a needle is a great decoration.

Basseting · 07/12/2017 12:38

liquid if I give the mice free popcorn they'll want Netflix next... Xmas Grin
Walkerbean 'I thought 12" wouldn't make that much difference' Snurk!

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 07/12/2017 12:49

Ha making Christmas special for the mice.

00100001 · 07/12/2017 13:28

Here, build a bridge and get over it.

Bumplovin · 07/12/2017 15:25

I can sort of understand as last year I cried I didn't like the tree my hubby picked but I was 3 days postpartum and cried at everything!

Downtheroadfirstonleft · 07/12/2017 17:54

I was about to write that,one year DH had had to decorate the tree, I hadn't liked it, but had sucked it up, when I remembered that about a day later, I'd redone the whole thing cos it was driving me mad... Blush

Original poster
inniu · 07/12/2017 18:00

Slight update.
I came home from work today and DH offered unprompted to move his tree to the family room if I want to get a new one for the dining room.

He says he really doesn't mind.

Would it still be wrong to get a new one?

OP posts:
CiderwithBuda · 07/12/2017 18:07

No! Get one if you want. A tree in the family room will be nice.

How often do you use the dining room?

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 07/12/2017 18:15

Oh get a new one! Life’s too short to put up with thin Christmas trees!

RidingWindhorses · 07/12/2017 22:20

Of course not! Good quality tree is very important - it will be up for a month. You can look at it every day with pleasure rather than annoyance.

Temporary2002 · 08/12/2017 00:52

No, in this case, he has gotten over it realized a larger tree is what he wants as well.Xmas Smile

WeAllHaveWings · 08/12/2017 06:02

I wouldn’t, I would tell him the tree he got has grown on you, I would feel he has agonised over your displeasure and this is his solution to make you happy as if his effort and feelings don’t count.

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