No Janet you can’t OWN running

[Janetsadick]

It’s not “your” hobby.

Nobody is stealing your thunder by taking up running.

If you faux roll your eyes and mention it again I’m going to throw a fucking stapler at your head

AIBU?

SURELY the man-Janet has to be Brad. No?

to say to @mnhq that this thread should become the Janet of classic threads. I know someone's already said it but it's ok because I have decided to become the Janet of pinching ideas.

Manet for men it is then!

I've just remembered that my late mother, bless her, owned 'doggy bags'. It didn't matter where we went out to eat - post restaurant or pub grub - she'd look at her plate and say "oh goodness, I can't possibly eat all of that, we'll need a DOGGY BAG".

It became a standing joke between DP and I how quickly she'd wheel out her 'doggy bag' comment. The irony was that she had an extremely good appetite and always - always - ate everything on her plate. So her hypothetical 'doggy bags' were always surplus to requirement

WEndy - an unfortunate linkage for some people actually called Wendy! - is someone who you meet and introduce to your group of friends, and then she slowly manipulates you out of your own friendship group.

Please can someone enlighten we on "The Zilla" now that I know what a Wendy is - Thanks

me not we

I used to have a friend who owned men chatting her up. If a guy came to chat you up while she was there, she would get incredibly sulky.

It got old.

The Zilla is the screaming, flouncing embodiment of entitled, brass necked diva - outed when some specific event reveals her (or his!) Zilla-like view of the world. Beyond MN I've only heard of Bridezillas, who go loopy demanding when planning their wedding, butvon MN there is no end to the situations that can bring out the hidden Zilla. Most recently I can recall Liftzilla, who insisted on being ferried free of charge by her colleague because why should she pay for work transport or suffer inconvenience? We've had Workzilla, who had screaming fits when discovering that her selfish friend would not look after her children for the entire summer with no payment - 'But I WORK!' Gluezilla- omg just link the threads. I think that might have been the one that kicked off the Zilla.

Can I borrow breathing for a while Mummyoflittledragon.

I'm not so bothered about eating could probably live off my fat until April

Who's Janet?

ah. Thumb Thanks. I have known a Wendy before. it was AWFUL.

I think of the 3 Wendys are the worst as it can ruin you life a bit.

My Crafting Janet happened to be in the coffee room just now when I was showing another colleague a photo of the advent calendar (the sort with little pockets) I made. She was VERY unimpressed. Lots of tutting and "I didn't know you crafted" followed by "You haven't really made that have you, just decorated it like kids do. I make everything for our christmas" and even remarkably "I'm the only person in this office who does crafting".

NB I did make it, completely. from scratch. but clearly this was not allowed.

she's breathtaking.

If it makes Janet feel better she can have MY running and I will stay home with some sensations crisps and Netflix.
Sharing is caring innit.

I should out myself as a bit of a Janet. I heard myself in the office the other day Janetsplaining India.

I went there once for 5 days. On business.

"Janetsplaining"

Love it

To Janet is now a verb.
"Are you attempting to Janet me? Cos I've got staplers!"

'She's a total Craftzilla - I thought she was trying to Wendy me for a moment but it was just that me and the girls were talking about felting so she HAD to get in there and Janetsplain the whole fucking process'

Ask Janet if she’s been “jogging” recently...if she’s anything like the women on RMR that’s pretty much the worst insult you can give a ‘runner’!!

Oh yes haha.

Nobody 'jogs' anymore. Except my extremely uncool DH 😁

Least you don't have to work with Rita who say '2 persons'

It's 2 people, plural!

Anatidae

You nicked my fucking Elf!

Interestingly, this is how Janet looks when she's had her wicked way with John.

It needs a very specific definition doesn't it.

To janetsplain (v) - as mansplain, but with a markedly shrill, anxious tone which betrays the janetsplainer's proprietorial feelings over the subject matter being discussed. To 'warn off' through pointed conversation, as in 'As soon as she found out I was learning karate, she janetsplained every move until I was left in no doubt that she was the karate queen of the office' 😆

I can't scroll down to the bottom because I am laughing too much

Oh damn, I meant ... posh restaurant ...

I haven't got a clue what a 'post' restaurant is. T and H are not that close on a keyboard when you're a touch typist

It certainly wasn't a Poste Restante, where you wouldn't be eating anyway.

My DM owns all activity - no one is busier than her, even though she does precisely nothing. She also owns all illness and fatigue, up to and including being the Janet of Death.

oldlaundbooth

ITS MY ELF NOW, DAVE....