Meghan and Harry don't look right together

[bungle99]

I was in small shop earlier with only 4 of us in their. I am a regular customer.
I heard a member of staff who was serving another customer talking about Meghan and Harry and staff member said they don't really look right together and that she's not an English Rose like Kate Middleton. I was really shocked by this because 1) that people of my generation actually think like this (middle age) 2) that she admitted this view out loud knowing i could actually hear it (i'm not white). I was only 3 feet away.

AIBU to think that this was a racist comment and that most white people do not think like this ? Please restore my faith Mumsnet.

its usually non white who see racism in anything that doesn't suit them

There are plenty of white people including my DH who thinks it was racist. Either anti american or anti non-white.

How does it not suit me ? I'm not trying to marry Prince Harry ! I was just listening to offensive comments whilst trying to get on with my daily business.

All I care about is that she doesn't start wearing flesh tights with boring nude pumps and starts sitting demurely with her ankles tucked under! I particularly can't stand that unnatural "demure" sitting pose that Kate apparently feels compelled to follow. I sincerely hope she keeps her fashion sense!

My 1. True though

I'm an English rose. Medium blonde and blue eyes. I constantly get negative comments about how pale I am. The word ghost gets tossed around a lot. I got bullied by tanned females in school, college, uni....even my friends joked about it....and I still have to put up with comments today. I should go on a sunbed, I need to get to the beach, am I a vampire etc. It doesn't matter how beautiful you are...if you're pale you're a target for this kind of thing. And nobody ever saw this as racist. It was acceptable, even in the workplace, even if I tried to voice my feelings. 'But you are really pale!' It made me hate myself.

I lived my whole life wanting to have darker skin because of this. The woman in the link, Rebecca, above is actually tan compared to me...that's how pale I am. There's nothing I can do about it,.

I think Meghan is absolutely stunning btw and they look lovely together.

^ the skin colour is irrelevant, but she definitely has the right look for a royal. Sort of pretty but classic face / hair.

Physically I don't find her pretty or beautiful. She looks so ordinary to me, totally indistinctive, plain. But it's none of my business, obviously Harry finds her attractive and besides physical attraction is only part of the deal initially. There needs to be more substance than physique. But I'm not the one marrying her so I don't care.
With the same token I don't find Harry attractive either in any shape or form. And they don't look good together imo. Again they haven't asked my opinion so i leave it .
I don't care whatever they do.

its usually non white who see racism in anything that doesn't suit them

Just . Sweetpea88 I wish I could give you 25 million s.
or middle fingers, tbh

And totally agree with Clafoutis It's really uncomfortable when people say "they will have beautiful babies!" esp when the underlying tone is that it's because of mixed ethnicity.

Just because it's 'well-meaning' racism, doesn't mean it's not racist.

Now they're suggesting she nearly dated Ashley Cole

This really made me guffaw

I bet we could all think of people we “nearly dated”.

I’ll start:

I “nearly” dated David Beckham (sat 2 seats away from him in a VIP area of a club)

Oh, and I “nearly” dated Gary Linaker (saw him twice in 2 days shopping in Westfield’s).

@HildasStocking

Have heard a few choice comments though, from the older generation. My in-laws exclaimed, in a horrified way that they 'could have a black baby'.

It's got naff-all to do with the older generation imo. I know many tolerant and lovely people who are 55 y.o. and older, who don't give a shit about anyone's race or colour or sexual orientation etc; and some very racist bigoted arseholes who are 25-40.

Being a racist cunt isn't an age thing. As I said, and I stand by it, anyone I have ever met who is racist and bigoted; is thick, badly educated, or a chav (or all 3.) Very little to do with age imo.

By the way, saying that a certain race has lovely hair or that you think they are very attractive isn't racist FFS! And it's not true that the British generally dislike the Americans! Some people just love to find fault and issues in everything.

i agree better, you can always spot the real lowlifes without dignity when they sell their stories to the press as soon as anyone's willing to buy - not worth the paper it was written on.

I used to hate the royals, I must be getting old as William and Harry seem alright, I can't think what you overheard is representative of british people in general. Such an ignorant thing to say on so many levels - they're getting married, of course they look right together!

Yes, racism is alive and well.

Yes, it's racist. And no, not everyone thinks like that.

NotWeavingButDarning
And totally agree with Clafoutis It's really uncomfortable when people say "they will have beautiful babies!" esp when the underlying tone is that it's because of mixed ethnicity. Just because it's 'well-meaning' racism, doesn't mean it's not racist.*

How is complimenting a couple based on their genes inferring or stating that MM is an inferior human being because of her race?

Its not a mine field. Its not hard to keep up. For people who havent managed to transition to just not saying offensive shit despite having been told for the last 20 years at least that the people it describes dont like it, and its not okay anymore, thats not "generational" or unwitting/unknowing/innocent racism. Its just racism

I have relatives in their 80s and 90s that manage to not be offensive. So people in their 40s and 60s are just being obnoxious when they say they just havent had enough time to adjust yet, cause it was okay in the 70s and 80s (it wasnt okay, it was just more acceptable" and thats not the same thing). And they dont mean it. They just dont want to be told what to do but they totally^ know that what theyre saying is offensive.

its usually non white who see racism in anything that doesn't suit them

Well golly gosh, I wonder why that is.

And nobody ever saw this as racist.

Because it's not racist. It's shit, I'll give you that, but not racist.

Sweetpea

Care to elaborate? Evidence please?

Someone said to me that DH and I were just like Meg and Harry.
There are zero points of similarity btwn me and Ms Markle except that I have brown skin and am married to a blue eyed Englishman.
I’ve also had the comments about our children being especially attractive cos, you know.

It’s not meant maliciously so I rarely challenge it but it does wear you down.

Well golly gosh, I wonder why that is.

Was that deliberate?!

By the way, saying that a certain race has lovely hair or that you think they are very attractive isn't racist FFS! Yes I generally love the looks of Italian or Irish men. Dark hair and brown eyes. Is that racist?

I don't think it's about colour as much as culture. If she was marrying Justin Beiber for instance I don't think anyone would consider her heritage an issue.
Bit like Trump going for Eastern European women. It seems incongruous.

Utterly racist and probably anti-American. She she's clearly in denial of the ethnicity of our monarchy anyway. The Queen is half German. Prince Charles is Half Danish, so only a quarter British. William will be the first monarch to be more than half British since Queen Anne (over 300 years ago).

What matters is that people marry someone they love and feel they can spend the rest of their lives with. Meghan looks like an upbeat person who will support Harry with his projects like Invictus Games and throw herself into her own charity work. That has got to be good for the monarchy.

I came on to say “Now you say it I see what you mean” Oops. I promise you I certainly wasn’t thinking what your acquaintance was thinking.

What I actually meant is that he looks like a regular (if relatively good-looking) bloke (a “civilian” to use Liz Hurley’s term) whereas Meghan looks like what she is, a fully polished and glossy network TV leading actress whose appearance is held to higher standards than lesser mortals. Doesn’t mean they won’t make a perfectly happy married couple, because that appearance is literally less than skin deep, just that I personally wouldn’t put them together if I was playing “match the couple” with only their photos to go on.

Anyway, as you were.

Flower, its quite simple. Mixed race people are individual. Just as capable of variety as anyone else. With the same spectrum of attractiveness as everyone else.

Its patronising to say " mixed race babies are so cute". It makes them sound like pets and it makes the person sayinv it sound like they think they are benevolent while at the same time being dehumanising

I sort of don’t think they look right together as he is punching above his weight - she is stunning!

MM is a Pippa Middleton clone, which is the only remarkable thing to most people about her appearance.

I can't see how shop woman was being racist, no doubt merely commenting on how she didn't foresee Harry ending up with a dark woman given how he's only dated blonds. English roses tend to be pink and pale, as the name suggests.