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AIBU?

Leaving toddler in car

371 replies

rabbitsdontlayeggs · 03/12/2017 10:38

Please settle this disagreement for me and my DH!

Leaving toddler (20 months) in the car while you go and pay for petrol. Would you do it? I would not (unless I was using pay at the pump, then I wouldn't get her out as I'd be stood right next to the car) but DH says he would and has. I'm horrified that he's left her and have said I really don't want him to do that again, he thinks I am ridiculous and 'it's only for two minutes'.

Who is UR?

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YouThought · 03/12/2017 12:21

I'd do it if i knew I'd be quick and if I could see the car.

Anditstartsagain · 03/12/2017 12:22

I leave mine in the car. My sister was knocked into at 3 in a petrol station my dad took us out the car to pay had a hold of a hand each and someone swung out for the air/water pump and hit her she was fine as they were obviously not going very fast but she was terrified.

Sweetmimi · 03/12/2017 12:26

I always take DD with me into petrol station, we live abroad so it’s hot the majority of the year. I wouldn’t be happy leaving the car running with air con on, and having an open window isn’t an option when the air outside is like a hair dryer. I don’t mind bringing her into the garage anyway, she sees it as a day out 😂

Abra1d · 03/12/2017 12:27

I always l do them in the car if in view of the till.

Jigglytuff · 03/12/2017 12:29

@reallybadidea - I remember that! And the people who said they got their husbands to fill up the car so they didn't have to take the terrible risk of taking children to the petrol station

Orangebird69 · 03/12/2017 12:31

Sweetmimi, we live in KSA for part of the year - there are pump attendants there so you don't have to get out of the car. Or turn the engine off (so you can keep the aircon going)

Emlou07 · 03/12/2017 12:32

I never used to, judged people who did. Have done recently as it's much easier and faster. Hang head in shame at judging 😂

LambMadras · 03/12/2017 12:32

Good grief. What level of paranoia do people have?? Do people actually believe that there is someone around every corner ready to kidnap your kids?
That must be a very tiring world to live in.

Ropsleybunny · 03/12/2017 12:32

We were in Costa yesterday and I saw a child of about nine months asleep in a car with no one with her. I waited a decent amount of time to allow someone to come back from parking a trolley etc. I then stood by the car and looked pointedly in. A man emerged from Costa, who had previously been in there eating his lunch. I approached him and asked if the child was his. He said "yes, she's mine".

I said I was worried that he'd left her and it was cold. He assured me he wouldn't have let her out of his sight and that the car was warm.

I hope I gave him enough to think about that he wouldn't do it again.

Ivehadtonamechangeforthis · 03/12/2017 12:35

I always leave mine in car seat when I pay for petrol.

I always park at a pump where I can see my car clearly whilst I'm inside paying.

greenapplesplatter · 03/12/2017 12:37

This has been done numerous times & there's always a divide!! I left mine in the car, they're left for longer whilst your actually filling it than the time you're in the kiosk paying. Now she has to come in with me & generally adds a fiver on the petrol bill by the time she's chose a comic & sweets

ememem84 · 03/12/2017 12:37

I’ve debated this with ds (10 weeks). But have changed petrol stations instead if he’s with me and I need to get it. None of the ones near me are pay at pump you have to go into the shop and none are close enough that I could see the car.

The one I use if he’s with me has a little old man who rushes out puts the petrol in the car for me (I can do it myself but he insists - he also tips his cap at me. He must be about 100...) and then brings the card machine to me. Or if I know I’m going there I take £40 with me and ask him to put £40 in (or thereabouts).

There have been cases here where people have been reported for leaving babies in cars and it’s a small community so I’m not takin any chances.

Mumsymcmumface · 03/12/2017 12:42

I said I was worried that he'd left her and it was cold. He assured me he wouldn't have let her out of his sight and that the car was warm.

I hope I gave him enough to think about that he wouldn't do it again.

Why?

He was watching her, he saw you and cane out (you disturbed his lunch)

What’s the problem. What’s the difference between eating in the kitchen if she is asleep upstairs?

Italiangreyhound · 03/12/2017 12:45

I used to leave kids locked in the car on the petrol forecourt but I could see the car.

Protectingmydaughterfromfilth · 03/12/2017 12:45

I work in a petrol station and a Mum left her 4 year old child in the car while she came into the shop to pay. The child got out of her seat and released the hand brake, the car then rolled forward into the electricity box. The child was unhurt but the car was damaged and so was the electricity box. Other customers have also left hand brakes off and cars have rolled into each other. So accidents can happen, I wouldn't leave a child in a car.

What a load of rubbish! My car won't release the handbrake if Engine & ignition is off as wont the majority of cars to my knowledge? My car in particular won't allow the ignition to switch off and the key out of the ignition unless it is in Park mode and electric handbrake is on. Even without the handbrake on, my car absolutely cannot physically move if in park mode but I realise not everyone's vehicle is the same. Obviously if parents are leaving their cars with handbrakes off that's plain stupidity and not the norm. It's also worth pointing out that if other drivers often do this, then surely that's another reason fo parents to keep their children inside their car if other cars are rolling around the forecourt unsupervised!

AlpacaLypse · 03/12/2017 12:47

Another vote for leaving in car. I wonder if these threads are actually started by a campaign group of garage owners desperately trying to get harassed parents to bring toddlers in and spend a fortune on sweets and comics?

Protectingmydaughterfromfilth · 03/12/2017 12:48

The first paragraphs of my previous post was meant to be in bold! (Quote!)

lalalalyra · 03/12/2017 12:52

I leave mine in the car. Of all the scenarios I think the safest place for them is secured in their car seats.

ilovepixie · 03/12/2017 12:57

What a load of rubbish! My car won't release the handbrake if Engine & ignition is off as wont the majority of cars to my knowledge? My car in particular won't allow the ignition to switch off and the key out of the ignition unless it is in Park mode and electric handbrake is on. Even without the handbrake on, my car absolutely cannot physically move if in park mode but I realise not everyone's vehicle is the same. Obviously if parents are leaving their cars with handbrakes off that's plain stupidity and not the norm. It's also worth pointing out that if other drivers often do this, then surely that's another reason fo parents to keep their children inside their car if other cars are rolling around the forecourt unsupervised!

Excuse me were you there? Just because your car can't do it, it doesn't mean all cars are the same.* You don't need to be rude. And people do leave hand brake off and cars do move. A car ran into my parked car when the driver left the hand brake off. Obviously you have to weigh up the pros and cons but I personally wouldn't do it.*

Kursk · 03/12/2017 12:57

I always left them.

Car may get hit- yes at 3mph, no real danger.
Child may wriggle free- maybe but if they haven’t tried to do this while you have been driving it’s unlikely that it will suddenly happen.

We have remote starters on our cars so we can lock DC or dogs in and start the car so the heater or AC is running.

Kursk · 03/12/2017 13:01

Where we live we don’t ever use handbrakes as they have a habit of freezing in the winter

rizlett · 03/12/2017 13:08

I'd never leave mine in a car on their own at all. A colleague left hers and her car caught fire - she didn't get them out.

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Mumsymcmumface · 03/12/2017 13:12

A colleague left hers and her car caught fire - she didn't get them out.

On the flip side “if” that was going to happen I can’t think of many other places better equipped than a petrol forecourt. Extinguishers and people everywhere.

The only better places I can think of are at a fire station, or in a formula one pit lane.

mando12345 · 03/12/2017 13:20

Gosh, I'm quite risk adverse and always left mine in the car, as long as I could see them.

Freddiesfling · 03/12/2017 13:22

I have 4 kids, 10,6, 4 and 1....... I would quite happily leave the others in the car but not my 4 year old he's an absolute menace who would escape out of his car seat.... fiddle with the controls, beep the horn, set off the alarm... you name it he would do it!! I would leave him with his oldest sibling but alone.... not a chance!!!!

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