To not tell DD

[Flippetydip]

DD is 6, nearly 7. She's been vegetarian since August and has been absolutely adamant about it, brilliant with what she eats and shows no sign of relenting. I'm all for this and have also pretty much gone veggie. DH and DS have not, therefore there is meat stuff in the fridge.

Fridays are our night when we rush from a to b and back again without time to turn round. I WFH so try and fit that in amidst everything else. This is me preparing my excuse for being such a fuckwit. I did oven chips and what I thought were fish fingers for DD tonight before she went out to Beavers (this is not an AIBU about crap parenting and crap food, it's Friday, we're busy, they eat well the rest of the time!) All good, I had one, thought weird consistency but nothing more of it. Got them out to put in for DS later and realised they were chicken fingers. We have never had these in the freezer before, I can only assume DH bought them as part of a Co-op meal deal or some such thing.

AIBU not to tell DD? I don't think it will do either of us any good.

Don't tell her just be careful next time. And also as another few people mentioned: she is not a vegetarian if she eats fish. She's a pescatarian and would do well to use that label instead.

Why are people so het up about a small child eating fish? So what, she's too young to understand the whole concept of vegetarianism or the ethical issues.
I really don't see that it matters she's not a "proper" vegetarian. My 5 year old niece likes to call herself a princess, I don't lecture her on the proper definition of a princess and tell her in no uncertain terms that she's not one.

Is this one of those threads where the Op drops a little itchy thing and then watches everyone prance around it ?

You've got it Impostress

Why are people so het up about a small child eating fish?

Who’s “het up”? 🤨

Nobody gives a Castlemain XXXX what OP’s kid eats.

What would be the point in telling her? What would you gain from that?

I also personally think it's nuts to let a 6 year old choose to be vegetarian. She's (clearly!) in no way old enough to understand what that means, identify vegetarian food or make informed choices, no matter how amazing and wonderful you find it.

Surely vegetarians would applaud anyone cutting down on their meat consumption, regardless of whether they eat fish?

I agree, and there’s nothing wrong with deciding to not eat meat apart from fish. The label “vegetarian” means no meat at all though. Thats the issue here. One of my colleagues calls herself vegetarian but eats sausage rolls which really irritates me.

Is het even a word? I think I made it up! You're right though Butchy. Life's too short for this bollocks.

That’s the point it isn’t the issue here. Mumsnet is completely full of dicks at the moment.

No don’t tell her, just be more careful

I’m surprised she couldn’t tell the difference. And while I don’t think you need tell her about this slip-up, I think she needs to know that fish are living things. (I’m not veggie, if it’s relevant)

Don't tell her about the chicken. But do explain that eating fish fingers means she is a pescetarian not a vegetarian.

Het is a word as in het up meaning a bit wound up it might be a northern thing?

Nothing to be gained from telling her.

Surely vegetarians would applaud anyone cutting down on their meat consumption, regardless of whether they eat fish?

I don’t give a shiny shit what anyone else eats. So no, I wouldn’t applaud a pescatarian or anyone else who cuts down on meat.

Choosing not to eat meat but still eating fish is a reasonable and common position to take. I think it's rather mean for people to say it makes no difference if she eats chicken just because she already eats fish. She chooses not to eat meat, whatever she calls it. That's her choice.

Ditto the snide jokes about fish being a vegetable. An egg isn't a vegetable either, but many vegetarians eat them, unless they're vegan. There are plenty of things that aren't vegetables that vegetarians nonetheless eat. Including fish as one of them was a very common usage when my mum took up that diet 30 years ago (afaik the word pescatarian hadn't even been invented then).

And language is all about usage. If you're being misunderstood so often as to find it a major irritation, perhaps you should adjust your communication instead of complaining about everyone else's understanding. Irritating as it is. If you wrote "vegetarian, no fish" on RSVPs you'd have less chance to get righteously indignant, but more edible meals. Worth a try surely.

Clearly OP and her 6 yr old have not heard of the word pescatarian. It hasn't been around long and isn't that widely understood, round here anyway. People think you're some strange religious sect. I'd usually say something like "mostly vegetarian but does eat fish" as it's completely clear.

OP, I'd be tempted to just leave it. I wouldn't lie if your DD asks, but going out of your way to point it out seems mean. It was your mistake not hers.

cactusjelly

It was a rhetorical question, I know thanks.

explain that because she eats fish she is a 'type' of vegetarian called a pescetarian
I think that's even more confusing! A pescetarian isn't a type of vegetarian.

And don't tell her about the chicken fingers OP.

A type of vegetarian called a pescatarian. Give me strength.

Why on earth would you tell her?

Morally there's not really much difference between eating chicken and eating fish. They were both killed for your dinner.

I am a bit surprised that a six year old can’t tell the difference between fish and chicken though?

Am I the only one that's amazed the OP had one & didn't realise by taste it wasn't a fucking fish finger???
Anyway, no I wouldn't tell her, what would you gain from it?

It's done now so not really worth making a fuss about. I get what people are saying about vegetarian = no fish, but it's not helpful to keep reiterating this.

My DD (also 6) is mostly vegetarian. She will occasionally eat chicken, but that's about it. She has said she'd like to try turkey and beef, so I've put her down for school dinners the days they have those options. She doesn't like fish, or at least, didn't like it when she last tried it. I'm not going to force her to eat stuff she doesn't like, but if she accidentally has something she'd not normally eat, and likes it, I'd let her get on with it.

I'd probably tell her IF she asked about it - e.g. if she said, "Those fish fingers I had last week were really nice, can we have them again?" and let her decide whether she wanted to or not.

Morally there's not really much difference between eating chicken and eating fish. They were both killed for your dinner.

Many more fish need to be killed to produce the equivalent amount of food that chicken and meat provides, so in that sense eating fish is the least ethical choice.

explain that because she eats fish she is a 'type' of vegetarian called a pescetarian
I think that's even more confusing! A pescetarian isn't a type of vegetarian.

Pescetarian IS A TYPE OF VEGETARIAN!!!!!

www.vegsoc.org/definition

I take it that you haven't told her that fiat isn't a vegetable either? Just don't tell her-there really is no need.