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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Stealing from self service tills

174 replies

user1498912461 · 01/12/2017 13:54

Dh has started to steal from self service tills. Mostly small items such as chocolate bars or cans but today he came home with a new wallet! He bragged about how the wallet was free. He has also on occasion come home with blind bags for ds. He'll pay for one but take 3! I basically told him he was shoplifting and we had a big argument over it. He said "everyone does it" and that I'm no better as we were under charged in a restaurant once and we didn't say anything. I told him he could easily be caught but he doesn't see the big deal in it. AIBU?

OP posts:
EvilDoctorBallerinaRoastDuck · 01/12/2017 14:09

Yes, that's shoplifting. Shock

BitOutOfPractice · 01/12/2017 14:09

Everybody else doesn't do this OP

rcit · 01/12/2017 14:10

Everyone else does not do it. It's a crime and most of us don't want to get a criminal record or go to prison.

BrutusMcDogface · 01/12/2017 14:10

He's a criminal. I wouldn't want to stay with him if he carried on doing this. No, not everyone does it!!

A pp asked how he would feel explaining this to his boss. What about explaining it to his son?! Kids grow up knowing and role playing that the police catch robbers and put them in jail.

Mari50 · 01/12/2017 14:11

If my DP was doing this i’d be too mortified to admit it even on an anonymous online forum.
What a dick.
And when you wander around supermarket swondering why the prices are rising this is one of the factors and your DH and entitled arseholes like him are to blame

SparklingSnowfall · 01/12/2017 14:11

Definitely stealing! I bet he'll get caught eventually, you say it's already gone from chocolate bars to a wallet, he'll see what else he can get away with, go a step too far and end up in a whole load of trouble.

WizardOfToss · 01/12/2017 14:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LagunaBubbles · 01/12/2017 14:13

Oh dear! Even if it is "only a chocolate bar" he will still be prosecuted when hes caught.

just5morepeas · 01/12/2017 14:13

I think a lot of those tills have cameras built in (could be wrong, but I think they do) and as another poster said, often they will know what you are doing but not say anything until the theft goes over a certain amount cash value or until they have built up a good case against him with video evidence, etc.

So one day he could easily get stopped and charged for everything hes taken even if he thinks he's getting away with it now.

TheGoalIsToStayOutOfTheHole · 01/12/2017 14:13

No everyone does not do this, how silly (I do know a few who do though Blush)

He could be in serious trouble if he was caught

Though I guess, they work so badly you could possibly pass it off as a genuine mistake.

I once did this accidentally. It beeped when I scanned something, then started shouting at me for 'unexpected item in bagging area' and the assistant came over to tlel it to shut up. When I got home I realised that there had indeed been an unexpected item in the bagging area as though it beeped it did not scan properly. Went back to pay and they laughed at me and said that it happens all the time, they are aware, and not to bother in future as its a 'staff error' Confused

thegrinchreaper · 01/12/2017 14:16

What other criminal activities is he engaging in if he thinks nothing of this?

NooNooHead1981 · 01/12/2017 14:16

Good grief. What planet is he on saying everyone does it?! Does he have a moral compass or conscience? Why does he think it's acceptable as these things are only worth 'small' amounts (excluding the wallet)?

He sounds like a twit. If he continues to do it, how will you deal with it? It would definitely make me think twice about staying with someone who was dishonest and a thief, and a cocky one to boot.

What example is he setting for your children?

Don't tolerate it any more.Angry

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 01/12/2017 14:17

What kind of gobshite tries to justify their husband being a low life tealeaf with "but everyone does it"??
Clearly everyone does not.

afishnotabird · 01/12/2017 14:18

I work self scan and occasionally get a shout over the radio from security that someone hasn’t scanned something, or hasn’t paid for their carrier bag, and off I trot over to demand their 5p.

They don’t catch everyone but they are watching and do catch people.

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 01/12/2017 14:18

Oh, he said it... He sounds like a particularly dim, and not particularly nice 8 year old boy.

NooNooHead1981 · 01/12/2017 14:19

TheGoal At least you were honest about it. That's probably why they let it go and shrugged it off. The OP's DH might not be so lucky though... Shock

SexLubeAndAFishSlice · 01/12/2017 14:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 01/12/2017 14:20

Of course it's stealing!

I hope he gets caught and prosecuted.

What a twat.

thecakefairy · 01/12/2017 14:20

I would encourage him to think about the consequences if he got caught.
If for some reason they had been watching him and decided to prosecute, ok, he may not get 10 years in prison but he will have a criminal record and it will rear its ugly head from time to time.
A lady I used to live near once stole a tin of chocolates and 3 years later her social worker mentioned it as it was on some notes!

ObscuredbyFog · 01/12/2017 14:20

You could ask him why he's just started to do this. Try and find out what's triggered this behaviour. You could try and point out the consequences of him being caught like family and friends having no respect for him, being prosecuted for theft, losing his job, never being able to work in certain sectors of employment after a theft conviction.
add any further repercussions you think may jolt him into reality.

Or you could tell him it's theft and if he's going to continue then he can find somewhere else to live because you and your kids and wider family don't want to be associated with anyone who would act like he is doing.

WooWooSister · 01/12/2017 14:21

I can't believe that you need to ask about this.
Your DH is stealing and you're condoning it. Otherwise, you would take back the items that he steals.

DJBaggySmalls · 01/12/2017 14:21

They dont always prosecute or ban you on the first theft, because they wont waste a courts time with the theft of a wallet.

But every so often they like to make an example of a persistent thief, and your DH is risking it.

FizzyGreenWater · 01/12/2017 14:22

Bloody hell that's awful.

Nasty thief.

Angry no everyone else does NOT do it.

wowfudge · 01/12/2017 14:23

I think many of us have probably accidentally failed to scan something or not realised it hasn't registered in some way, but he's doing it deliberately and is therefore a thief. And he's proud of himself. Wanker. He sounds like the kind of person who thinks insurance fraud is what everyone does and is a victimless crime. That kind of thing ultimately just puts prices up for everyone.

Jaxhog · 01/12/2017 14:23

This is THEFT. No two ways about it. If he is caught, he will find this out.

It doesn't matter if other people do it, it is still THEFT!

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