Having my vagina touched in security, aibu to feel pissed?

[sadiesnakes]

Just back from a short break to New York. I brought my 7 mth old dd, who is being fed aptimil formula, so purchased the individual 7oz bottles to cut out having no proper sterilized water facility’s in the hotel we stayed in. On the out going flight I packed 6 bottles and 4 baby food pouches which were put through a scanning machine thingie in security to detect whatever bad things it is they are looking for, reassured it was perfectly safe for the baby food, no problems. On the way back we had a short stopover, flying from LaGuardia to Dulles to Dublin (home). I had 6 milks in carryon and went through security, which is understandably very tight, no complaints there. All bags were scanned and again baby food was flagged. It was explained to me, since the bottles of formula were 7oz and not smaller I had a choice to either have them confiscated or accept an invasive 4 minute pat down. Since the trip was expected to be at least 12 hours I had no choice but to accept the pat down as my baby would obviously be starving and needed to be fed without question. It was thoroughly explained to me exactly how long it would take and what would happen, my sensitive areas would be gone over with the backs of the female security officers hand, I accepted and the pat down began, I was totally fine with everything, slightly embarrassed as it was done in front of a lot of other travelers but wanted to get it over with as pushed for time. She checked hair , neck, arms, chest, back, breasts, stomach, backside, up and down the insides of my legs, both front and back, so four times, but each time touched my vagina. Now im not prudish etc and understand they need to be very comprehensive in their searches, but this made me so uncomfortable I felt like bursting out crying. My Dh was holding the baby and all our luggage and was looking at me concerned and I felt so embarrassed. Basically I am saying aibu in being angry and humiliated that in order to have formula food for a 7 mth old baby for a 12 hour travelling period I have to have my vagina searched 4 times and does this actually make any sense, security wise? Sorry this is actually quite long😳.

People who believe that random pat downs at airport are a genuine security measure and not simply a a charade to reassure the public that something is being done are a bit naive.

What like a rally for vulva drivers?

They start it by...
Ready
Steady
FLAPS FLAPS FLAPS!

Well thank god mine manages to use the right words

Or what? Would you get into a right old flap about it?

Meh.

I've been patted down dozens of times. In the US they also stick their hands in your waistband.

It's entirely perfunctory and doesn't bother me remotely.

Use of vulva on MN is going the way of use of “fora” as a plural.

Everyone knows it’s the correct term but it just marks you out as a twat if you keep banging on about it’s use

buzzkillingtin you’re thinking about a different type of pat down. The one that the OP refers to is very intrusive and it would be extraordinarily unlikely you had had one “dozens of times”

Call a twat a twat, that's what I say.

I have also been SA and I did have this search too which also made me feel uncomfortable - although I had no choice - I was singled out. They are basically touching your crotch. I was a bit shocked but in reality if they are doing this for security, they can't leave this area out as it wouldn't make sense not to check it...or the people trying to take something on the plane would then hid this something there. I'm sorry this has upset you. I hope you feel better knowing it's common practise and put this behind you.

do you mean vulva or vagina?

So fucking pedantic.

Mys be awful for very young women, girls (are there any rules about controlling children?) and people who have previously been sexually abused or assaulted. Could possibly trigger PTSD.

Should be interesting when trans people start applying for these jobs although many of the female security staff look pretty flipping butch

It's not pedantic as to whether someone had either brushed against your outer labia or actually had their finger up your chuff in a body search.

People who believe that random pat downs at airport are a genuine security measure and not simply a a charade to reassure the public that something is being done are a bit naive.

Thank you Willow, I agree, but an "expert" will be along to slap us both soon.

"It's not pedantic as to whether someone had either brushed against your outer labia or actually had their finger up your chuff in a body search."
so true even though i hate the grammar / language police. but in the case of sexual assault it is vital to the right body part names. interestingly vulva used to mean uterus. go figure.

It's not pedantic as to whether someone had either brushed against your outer labia or actually had their finger up your chuff in a body search.

It is when just using a bit of common sense when reading the op shows this isn’t the case at all. The fact she had all her clothes on and was stood in public means it’s very obvious she didn’t have a finger put up her actual vagina, and anyone who needs to point out ‘it’s actually vulva!’ knows they are just being pedantic. Common sense > the need to be right about flaps.

@WillowWeeping as I’ve said on this thread more than once, I’ve had this type of pat down a lot. And again, US security rolled these in in April so many others will too.

It’s not unusual. If you get a pat down in the US now it’s most likely to be like this to go along with the new security measures.

It would certainly be possible in certain clothing, Edmund. When I was sexually assaulted on a public bus someone put their hand up my skirt and their finger went inside my anus.

I think in this context it is not pedantic to clarify whether the vagina has been touched (as specifically stated) or whether an over the clothes search including the groin was carried out.

In some cases cavity searches may be carried out (obviously not in the airport security area) in which case the vagina would be touched, but that is not remotely what happened here and I think it is useful to be clear about that.

I had search 20 odd years ago, arriving in Israel. Even now, I question my memory of it. I'm sure I was stripped to my underwear, as I recall and I'm convinced I was touched inappropriately. Quite deeply. But then I'm unsure, like I can't quite believe it happened and my memory is incorrect.
Very odd thing.

bummybum and as I’ve said I have had 1000+ airport security pat downs in the past few years and only once have I had the “intimate” type.

In the past 6mths I’ve been patted down at SFO, JFK, IAD & MIA. None of them were the “intimate” type.

Well I must have lucked out then!

When I was sexually assaulted on a public bus someone put their hand up my skirt and their finger went inside my anus.

I’m very sorry you were assaulted, really. However, it’s clear from the clothing the op was wearing, and from the tone of all her posts that no fingers or otherwise were inserted. Certain posters have gone on for pages about it being ‘vulva’ even though the matter could have been dropped after page 1, that is being pedantic.

It's not an effective search unless they are going to go inside with a finger and a Davy lamp, so what is the point of feeling your vulva on the outside of your clothes, unless it's to make a show of security and to make people feel intimidated that the same time?

I can stuff a lot more in my capacious vagina than in the gusset of my panties. Which is a godsend when trying to avoid the luggage restrictions on Ryan Air.

"Which is a godsend when trying to avoid the luggage restrictions on Ryan Air."

Certain posters have gone on for pages about it being ‘vulva’ even though the matter could have been dropped after page 1, that is being pedantic.

Most people were going on about how pedantic it was to even ask. Other people are saying it wasn't pedantic but a question of fact, not common sense or assumption. It wasn't clear to many people what the OP meant and perfectly reasonable, not pedantic, to clarify that.

I don't believe for one second that anyone genuinely read the OP and thought she had been touched internally in her vagina. What a fucking ludicrous suggestion. You really thought the OP had an internal examination with the back of someone's hand in front of other travellers. Utter rubbish and what cunty responses to a thread where the OP was upset.