To think this isn't appropriate or very professional from school?

[Peppapigshouse]

My child's church primary school has a special mass on an evening after school and they've asked children and parents to attend.

The school has now sent a text saying that children can wear their own clothes, but ha e stated "No tracksuits, short skirts or strappy tops".

It's not the tracksuits bit that bothers me, it's the bit about no short skirts or strappy tops.

Why not just ask for appropriate clothing for winter church? Why the need to specify about short skirts and strappy tops. These are primary school children and it just sounds like they are implying something.

I think it's really inappropriate and unprofessional coming from a school.

I imagine it comes from experience and not being specific enough to prevent skimpy/ sexualised clothing on little girls.

It doesn't read as a 'girl' problem, it reads as a parent problem.

Op I agree with you here

Also. What is wrong with tracksuit bottoms? They are standard comfortable and WARM clothing

Short skirts..... what do they mean by short?? How short?

Strapped tips? Well what's wrong with straps?

Surprised by the list. I'd expect smart dress to include no jeans, football shirts, trainers. What length is short skirt anyway?

And why can't girls wear trousers to school??

I agree with the school. Strappy tops are for discos and parties not for church. I don't think it's sufficient to say winter clothes. People wear strappy tops in winter. But hopefully not to church.

Tracksuit bottoms are 'winter' clothes..... so why ban them??

Do you always like everyone you work with?

No. But I would never work somewhere where I had no respect for the Headteacher. And if you are a volunteer then you aren’t relying on the salary.

I definitely wouldn’t slag off where I worked on MN, inviting in comments about how unprofession my place of work was. If I had a genuine issue about it I would raise it with the Headteacher himself out of respect.

We have volunteers that work at our school. I would be disgusted if I knew they were slagging off the school on a public forum. I would definitely not want to work with them.

A) it doesn't say girls can't wear short skirts or strappy tops. It says no child, regardless of gender can wear short skirts or strappy tops.
B) it's very fashionably to wear short skirts where by ones arse is hanging out. It's not very common to see this trend in male clothing. Male shorts tend to not graze the lower arse cheek.
C) having your shoulders covered in church is extremely common practice. T-shirts cover your shoulders. There is no problem there. Even in the Vatican you can have your arms exposed but not your shoulders.
D) you are being ridiculous.

Of course it has sexist undertones. It's bizarre that anyone would try and argue otherwise.

PS I find it rather insulting you think only girls wear skirts or strappy tops and only boys wear tracksuits

* C) having your shoulders covered in church is extremely common practice*

Er.... weddings? Brides, bridesmaids, guests...... I've seen plenty wearing off the shoulder dresses

Even, basque topped dresses!!!

Lots of men wear (very long) skirts in church...

And girls/women. And ruffles. I wouldn't recommend either for comfort.

I'm not sure where I've said that girls don't wear tracksuits???

It's obvious to anyone that 'short skirts and strappy tops' is aimed at girls.

..and that tracksuits is primarily aimed at boys.

1 boys' item of clothing mentioned, 2 for girls.

Blatant sexism to the external eye? No. Blatant sexism to someone already pre-programmed to expect sexism from the person they suspect to have sent the text? Possibly.

If this fairly innocuous message is the last in a long line of evidence of sexism, then I understand the 'straw that broke the came's back' situation, and would suggest that you approach the school about the problem in its entirety, not this specific small thing which can be read either way from an external perspective.

Though it might be worth checking the actual author of the text - IME much more likely to be a receptionist or admin than the head themselves - before assuming that it is a symptom of the head's sexism.

Running, I think this is a Catholic school / church. I agree that off-the-shoulder dresses are [now] not uncommon in CofE church weddings. Are they also common in weddings held in the Catholic church between two practising Catholics? I haven't attended enough to know?

Er.... weddings? Brides, bridesmaids, guests...... I've seen plenty* wearing off the shoulder dresses

Even, basque topped dresses!!!*

If you read my post properly, I said it was very common practice. I didn't say it was mandatory. There are, of course, exceptions. Are you suggesting that children should be able to wear basque topped dresses for a standard Christmas service?

Are they also common in weddings held in the Catholic church between two practising Catholics? I haven't attended enough to know?

No they're not tbh. Typically those who marry in a Catholic Church (and are practicing catholics) do often cover their shoulders.

Er.... weddings? Brides, bridesmaids, guests...... I've seenplentywearing off the shoulder dresses
It depends on the church.

Some high Anglican and Catholic churches stipulate modest, appropriate dress for men and women.

It's why when you go to catholic countries in Europe there are often signs outside the cathedrals saying no shorts above the knee, no crop tops/strappy tops etc.

They're clearly pointing out specifically something based on previous years outfits.

If you say 'smart appropriate clothing' there's some parents who take that to mean anything you feel like / party dress etc.

Unfortunately, there are many people who can't get their silly heads around what appropriate dress is for a given situation. Common sense is far from common and clearly the school have had issues in thr past.
(We've had to say on non uniform days that we want shoulders and stomachs covered and specified that trousers should cover boxers because some parents think tiny glam crop tops are appropriate attire for school and think it's fine for boys to come in showing off their boxers . No doubt someone will tell me we were wrong to do that because it 'sexualises teens'. It doesn't. It just isn't attire for school)

Hardly worth getting offended over.

Exactly cherrychasimg we all (I hope) realise it's not appropriate to turn up at church, in December dressed for a Summer disco.

Not all. Most. School wouldn't have needed to have issued any sort of dress code at all if this hadn't bene a problem in the past. You might think you know what "appropriate" or "respectful" means but lots of people don't. Primary aged children in Scotland can be almost 12 by this time of year, I know an almost 12 year old who went to a party this weekend with fake tan, professional make-up, high heels and a skin tight bodycon dress. Her mother obviously thought that was appropriate.

It is probably worth pointing out - it would until recently have been absolutely common knowledge, but [having taught the reformation to bewildered pupils for some years] it is no longer common - that churches are different.

What might be appropriate in an evangelical 'low' Anglican church - from the point of view of behaviour, dress, music, specific rituals, who speaks, congregational participation, content of preaching etc etc etc - might be absolutely unacceptable in a high Anglican church just down the road, and vice versa [suggest incense or censing with holy water to an evangelical congregation....]. That's before you start thinking about different denominations.

Just because off the shoulder wedding dresses are tolerated when two non-believers get married in a CofE church 'because it is pretty and traditional' doesn't mean that they are always welcomed in all churches.

Maisypops has beaten me to it, I immediately thought of the trend for showing boxers. A few years ago there was a huge trend for teen boys to wear trousers ever lower. This was noted and incorporated into the 'appropriate attire' lists at the time. Likewise short skirts and strap vest tops are popular but aren't appropriate for a junior smart casual event. In this case I don't think it's sexist, just reflecting recent issues.

YABU. They are trying to ensure everyone dresses appropriately. If this isn't aimed at your child, ignore it. If it is, take it on board.

This is a primary school though.

I have only ever seen girls at the school wearing leggings and jumpers with trainers.

The absolute worst I have seen is ballet pumps on a cold day, or the very little ones wearing those Disney princess style dress up dresses, but always with tights and leggings underneath.

I have never in all the years at the school seen a child wearing a short skirt or strappy top.

Our school had to implement a "school uniform only" policy at the first holy communion as there were continuously children (well girls) with inappropriate clothing for what is supposed to be a holy ceremony. Unfortunately they were unable to set a dress code for the parents. Many of the mums look as if they are going out on the lash, with bum cheeks and thongs on full view for the congregation to lust look at.