Nursery is absolutely obsessed with mud and mess

[ineedaninstructionmanuel]

AIBU to think there's a limit between encouraging children to play freely and encouraging them to make a mess?

I don't mind a bit of mud but today he is absolutely encrusted in it. He was apparently rolling in a puddle. His jacket is soaking wet and completely filthy. I don't mind a bit of natural mess (most of his nursery clothes are paint stained handmedowns anyway) but this is over the top.

Since he started they have started to send out more and more tweets about creativity and mess being linked. They also tweeted this week a photo of one of the play areas which was totally trashed- lentils and beans poured on the floor, sticks everywhere, things trodden on and mashed in.

My older DS went there and they were much more sensible and realistic... AIBU to have a word?

Like most people I'm all for messy play but I'd be looking at whether the nursery is clean and tidy at the start of the day and if appropriate clothing was used for arsing about and kids given the opportunity to change if they were wet and cold.

We stopped our (admittedly older kids) going to a afterschool group because they were all for leaving the kids to their own devices in a healthy outdoorsy way - but it resulted in injury and major discomfort on more than one occasion and it was actually more a load of neglectful bollocks when I come to think about it.

Another mum at my daughters nursery doesn’t drive nor does she own or have space for a washing machine,
She has to take her laundry on the bus to the laundrette the look on her face when she gets handed a rammed full carrier bag full of wet muddy clothes is sad

Allowing children to get this muddy repeatedly is just crazy.

It's so wasteful to get things dirty just for the sake of it which then have to laundered in detergents and hot water. It's bad for the environment and economically for parents. The clothes get ruined. So they may be cheap/hand me downs. They can't be handed down any more after this can they? Children should be learning to take responsibility for looking after resources, turning off taps and so on. Not being wasteful for fun.

This post reminds me of every trip I take to the park with other mums. They say to me "did you know your DC has mud on his bottom?, did you know his hands and feet are covered in sand?, did you know his knees are black with dirt?" YES I KNOW AND ISN'T BLOODY GREAT HE CAN HAVE FUN?. Its ok I own a washing machine hahaha.

DS nursery is like this and I think it's great. I provide his wellies - they provide the rainsuits and the aprons which they wash every evening - so don't really have the mud-caked problem which is why I'm sine with it. So apart from the odd bits that aren't covered (hands/feet/hair/the odd bit of sleeve) it's not a problem.

If he came home as clean as I sent him in I'd be a bit worried that they'd done nothing all day. My kids like getting dirty - I see it as their job and they're very good at it!

Can anyone explain how exactly a child benefits mentally/psychologically from creating a huge mess? I am not talking about the usual getting messy while playing regular games or playing outside or painting. But the kind of caked-in-mud-chocolate-and sodding glitter-all at once-like-a-rabid-dog-because-it's-fun mess. If grown-ups encourage it, why don't they do it to themselves too in order to have fun and cheer up on a rainy (muddy) day? Then clean it all up themselves? Because cleaning all that shit up is fun too...

It's wonderfully freeing when grown ups aren't constantly nagging them about the state of their clothes/hair etc. To just be allowed to do what they want to do, to experiment with textures and natural materials. Having limits like 'it has to teach them something' or 'they must be creative' is actually not the same thing at all.

Adults? Bah they're too uptight and boring aren't they? Nah they have to wash the clothes. tell you what, if I wasn't having to look nice or do the laundry or clean and change them, I absolutely would join in sometimes! One of my best memories a few years ago was diving out a little boat into a muddy river. I felt free and alive.

martellandginger a lady ran up to me in the park in a panic because my then 12 month old had put a stick in her mouth. A stick! It's not dog poo is it! Arguably it could contain dog poo but I guess she won't do it again if it did

I keep a change of clothes for both toddlers under the buggy. it never seems to be a big deal to me. A change of coat too and you're winning! I can't see any other reason not to allow messy play.

Would you allow your toddlers to sit in puddles though?

IMO this is a bit silly. It isn't like the nursery cover him in the mess. He is exploring and learning in the way that he knows is best for him. If you don't want him to get as messy, provide an all-in-one puddle suit to prevent as much mess and just give it a wipe over at the end of a mucky session. Children learn best when they get messy and hands first in the play, it shows they are learning and developing in their own way. Just leave him to his mess, give him a bath and shove a load of washing on

Would you allow your toddlers to sit in puddles though?

It's something they do a lot! I have a video of my 2 year old lying down in one..hair and everything wet and muddy! It was a couple of minutes walk from my house so I could just chuck her straight in the bath. I don't think they go that far at nursery though, this was a deep puddle. Nursery playgrounds are usually fairly flat.

I've never seen anybody standing there cheering as their toddler sat into a puddle and rolled about. It may have been a Kodak moment for you, Mamabear, but not many would share your enthusiasm.

Maybe it's easier in our circumstance as the nursery has no 'inside'. It's just the forest all day. The suits get caked in mud. I do not wash them very often - once a month, perhaps? Why wash them?

I am hoping all that mud helps with allergies for them and for their own children.

Mamabear4180 so how do you experiment with textures and natural materials by getting so filthy that your own mother doesn't recognise you? Care to explain?

No my enthusiasm is rare, but the point is I doubt nursery are even going that far and that it's good for them.

madreputa What do you mean?

Also..I didn't cheer. The uptight part of me was thinking 'aghhhh' but I understand the importance of toddlers experimenting and didn't want to limit her by my own hang ups. She was fine and had a great time.

As long as the kids are not left soaking wet, cold with blue lips all day, the nursery sounds wonderful.

Mud and (kids) paint washes off very easily. It's great that the kids have a place to have fun like that. They understand perfectly the difference between school and home, and it means your house can be kept clean and tidy. What's not to like?

Even in reception, so what if they get messy? Uniforms in state schools don't cost much at all, and that's what they are for, getting dirty.

If you don't like the nursery, you are free to change. As a parent, I would be less than impressed if practitioners or teachers had to keep kids indoor and clean because someone had a moan. What a shame, and what a wasted occasion for the children.

Definitely shoukd have all in one waterproof and wellies for wet and.muddy activities. If nursery doesn't supply the suits parents should be asked to supply. Children love a mess, some never have the opportunity to be messy.

I don't have a choice. Wherever my children go, they attract mud! My son's nursery was like this, he loved it. I didn't mind either. I only ever sent in 1/2 lots of clothes though. He had waterproofs & I expected them to be worn if he was bathing in the mud. I actually like it when my kids gets dirty, it's a sign of a good time. Nothing better than getting them in the tub & scrubbing them clean too. Clean pj's, snack, teeth, bedtime story (not every night). Goodnight tired children that looked feral an hour ago. Hello mum time

My dd when she was small hated being messy (possibly sensory issues), yet would be expected to put her hands in jelly, get covered in mud etc. I think a certain amount of messy play is good but it needs to be taught alongside tidying up. I'm not convinced rolling in a puddle is useful apart from getting the child dirty and wet! I would ask what the learning expectation of doing so is. There's a difference between creativity/messy but constructive play and children running wild or going feral. It reminds me of the kids when I was small who were allowed to break toys, hit other kids and open packets in the supermarket as the mothers praised them for expressing themselves, whilst the rest of us got a smack!

I love mud and mess. So do my children. Clothes wash and it is amazing ti see what they come up with

I used to go to school with a girl who'd take poo out of the toilet (anybody's). I now have a phobia but I wonder if that would now be considered as developing creativity?

Because it's the new thing for preschools to be outdoorsy and muddy etc my littles ones nursery is the same and they have indoor outdoor freeplay so she often comes home cold, wet and muddy

I think there’s a line between messy play and rolling in a puddle. It’ll also be confusing to him if he tries to do that when you’re with him and you understandably say no.
This

Your nursery sound like they’ve heard about great research, taken the idea and run away with it without actually understanding it properly...

This. With bells on.

It's fun to do it as a one off but a bit narrow sighted to do Messy Play so frequently. There are hundreds of other creative avenues.

I would find it annoying to pick up a wet mud/food encrusted toddler every time. It's unnecessary and not all of them enjoy it.

It sounds like a photo opportunity for their Twitter page to be honest.

The outside play area is going to become a rat magnet with all the lentils and beans chucked about.