""who wrote a long post about how little girls shouldn't be considered innocent and can be kinky and deviant just like everybody else, that was the gist."
That makes me rage.
I hit puberty relatively early. I've been 5'8 since at least second year of high school. I was hit on in a Brownie uniform by grown men, I was hit on by a Fighter Pilot dressed as Santa (he was in his twenties, I was 12), I was followed off the bus and asked out by strangers as a teenager. I was deliberately soaked at a party so that my clothes stuck to my body by adult men. My father's squadron called me "Jailbait". I've had family friends tell me they wanted to spank me. I've been groped, fondled and called frigid for pushing them away. I've been raped as a student and had my pain and my fear dismissed and belittled in childbirth. All of that happened for one reason and one reason only, because I am female.
Do I have kinks, yes I do and I did as a 12 year old but did I want to explore that with any of the men I've mentioned above, no. Nor would I want to share changing facilities, bathrooms or anything else with them or people like them regardless of how those people identify.