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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think that someone is in for a bollocking tomorrow

242 replies

Worriedobsessive · 05/11/2017 22:16

which they richly deserve!

Difficult families? Angry

to think that someone is in for a bollocking tomorrow
OP posts:
HildeburgBrown · 05/11/2017 23:16

Also, the job spec is for someone to work on the conversion of statements to EHCPs - basically a bureaucratic role, dealing with the paperwork. Hence the need to be able to write good outcomes (good means well written, precise, time-limited etc) in the EHCP. The job is not a senior caseworker or someone who sits on a SEN panel who has the power to say whether a newly presenting child meets the threshold etc.

WishingOnABar · 05/11/2017 23:17

I think Campervamp explains perfectly why this is badly written. Its insensitively done.

PoppyPopcorn · 05/11/2017 23:19

The whole advert is very poorly written.

Ceto · 05/11/2017 23:25

All I'm saying is that this is very standard wording and will be in most people's job descriptions for jobs working with the public.

I'm sorry, but this is nonsense. How many adverts for nurses, shop workers, lawyers, teachers, bank clerks, estate agents etc do you see where there is a requirement that they be able to deal with difficult people? Yet they all work with the public.

The simple fact of the matter is that there is a perception in local authorities that parents of children who need EHCPs are almost automatically difficult because they are asking the council to spend more money to carry out their legal duty towards children with SEN than the council want to. If that were not the case, there wouldn't be so many tribunal appeals, and those appeals wouldn't carry the parental success rate that they do. If, into the bargain, they want councils to apply the law correctly, they are perceived as extremely difficult.

tiggytape · 05/11/2017 23:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ceto · 05/11/2017 23:29

Hildeburg, you do realise, don't you, that there are difficult families involved in virtually all schools, not excluding private schools? Yet you don't see adverts for people able to deal with difficult families for staff in local authority school admissions departments, or admin staff in academies and independent schools.

DonkeyOaty · 05/11/2017 23:31

That is a terrible insight into how some people think isn't it. Depressing.

Sienna9522 · 05/11/2017 23:33

Ceto I'm a nurse, the advert for the job I applied for used the words 'challenging' to describe service users and their families. At least it was honest. I really don't see the problem!

Worriedobsessive · 05/11/2017 23:35

What service was that, Sienna? Why would they be difficult?

OP posts:
Sienna9522 · 05/11/2017 23:37

Mental health. Not difficult, challenging. I believe there is a difference.

Worriedobsessive · 05/11/2017 23:40

Mental health IS a challenging area to work in. The parents of children with SEN are not the service users per se, their kids are. But the LA is describing the families as difficult.

OP posts:
Worriedobsessive · 05/11/2017 23:43

Yes, Special Needs Jungle picked it up as well as others

OP posts:
Ceto · 05/11/2017 23:43

People may not be aware of the particular context behind the fact that this is an advert for someone to deal with conversion of Statements to EHCPs. We are now coming up to the final deadline for this to happen - 1st April 2018. Because that is a process normally taking 18 weeks, councils will have to have begun the process for every single statement by mid November - and there are some councils which have hundreds, and even thousands, left to do.

That causes a number of tensions, not least that by law they are supposed to carry out a full EHC needs assessment for each and every one of those conversions unless the parents agree that it is not necessary. If it's done properly, that means getting reports from schools, educational psychologists, social workers, and all other relevant professionals including people like speech and language therapists, physiotherapists, occupational therapists etc. Only there simply aren't enough educational psychologists around to do those assessments, and NHS therapy departments don't want to know either.

So, over the last three years, there has been a steady process of local authority case officers keeping very quiet to parents about the requirement to carry out full assessments. People working in this area will tell you that there have been countless incidents when LAs haven't bothered to ask parents whether they agree to do without assessments, and numerous cases where they have come up with nonsense excuses, e.g. that they don't have to get a speech assessment if the child isn't already known to the speech and language service.

Those people will also tell you that, as the deadline approaches, there have been more and more cases where LAs are blatantly rushing through conversions without even hinting to parents that assessments are needed, or outright refusing to do so even when parents ask. The plain fact of the matter is that they would rather than vulnerable children get crap EHCPs than admit that they haven't done their jobs and/or be brave enough to tell the government that this was always a ridiculously unrealistic deadline.

So: the person applying for this post is going to be doing a totally shitty job over the next five months where they are going to be under massive pressure to hit that deadline, and that will necessitate riding roughshod over the rights of children with SEN and disabilities, lying to their families, ignoring their totally reasonable requests that the LA comply with the law, and producing crap EHCPs that aren't fit for purpose because the LA hasn't got the evidence it needs to write decent EHCPs. And a lot of those families will be less than impressed, and, I very much hope, will make a massive fuss.

Those are the "difficult people" that it is so necessary that the successful applicant be able to deal with. And that is why it is necessary to highlight that in the advert.

Ellie56 · 05/11/2017 23:44

... there is a perception in local authorities that parents of children who need EHCPs are almost automatically difficult because they are asking the council to spend more money to carry out their legal duty towards children with SEN than the council want to. If that were not the case, there wouldn't be so many tribunal appeals, and those appeals wouldn't carry the parental success rate that they do. If, into the bargain, they want councils to apply the law correctly, they are perceived as extremely difficult.

Couldn't agree more, Ceto.

Worriedobsessive · 05/11/2017 23:46

Bravo Ceto

OP posts:
blue25 · 05/11/2017 23:48

I don't understand why people are being so sensitive. I've worked with parents and like all areas of society, some of them are difficult. What's the issue?

Worriedobsessive · 05/11/2017 23:49

Blue25 please read CETO’s post. Now do you see?

OP posts:
KathArtic · 05/11/2017 23:51

Looks like a draft to me.

Theres no context to base opinion.

Sienna9522 · 05/11/2017 23:52

Worried, I posted earlier saying that I don't agree that the word difficult should have been used but the word challenging, yes. Difficult sounds derogatory whereas the word challenging, to me, means something to work at and overcome. Surely, the role advertised requires the individual to work with the families and overcome any difficulties presented.

DonkeyOaty · 05/11/2017 23:54

Ceto. Great post.

Worriedobsessive · 05/11/2017 23:55

Sienna I get what you’re trying to say. And sorry for my snappiness. It’s just that the families here are called difficult but challenging would be similarly inappropriate because we are ONLY challenging the terrible system.

OP posts:
Sienna9522 · 06/11/2017 00:11

Worried, you really didn't come across as snappy and I do understand your point Flowers

SunnySkiesSleepsintheMorning · 06/11/2017 00:15

YANBU. I have applied for (and worked in) roles where is it made clear that I need to be skilled in managing challenging situations. People should not be described as challenging, the situation may very well be though.

Person first language is so important to the point that we no longer say “Mrs Smith is Appletree Dementia Nursing Home has challenging behaviour” but we talk about “behaviour that challenges (staff)”.

salsmum · 06/11/2017 00:16

My daughter is severely physically disabled with cerebral palsy, she is 29 next year and I have at times been a lone parent too (12 years total) sadly for most of my DD life I have had to fight tooth and nail for support and access to an ever dwindling LA service. I have discovered that funding for services is a ‘post code lottery’ and I have met many professionals who start work in my borough (social workers and occupational therapists) and are really good but then after a couple of months leave because just like me they are overworked,underfunded and exasperated with the workload and helplessness of the situation. My DD has not had physiotherapy for seven years since leaving college and the amount of money available for my DDs care package now she is living independently is minimal so the agencies we can afford have a high turnover of staff because they pay minimum wage. Because the local Day centres are closing my DD has only one to go to where there are much older people ( she affectionally calls it Gods waiting room) Wink Over those 28 years I’m sure somewhere along the line I have been referred to as a ‘difficult’ parent because I’ve seen my DDs health both physically and mentally deteriorating due to lack of appropriate support and local funding..do I see that as unjust and unfair? Absolutely, do I see it as my job as a parent to be my DDs advocate ? Of course, maybe the ‘difficulty’ here is that vulnerable people are suffering because of government funding.