to risk my own health for a 4th child?

[TVTregrets]

Is it unreasonable to risk your own health to have another baby when you have older kids who need you to be fit and healthy?

I expect the answer is yes and yet I am finding it so hard to convince myself it’s not worth the risk.

After my 3rd I had some stress incontinence and underwent a surgery called TVT. It was successful. However recently the Press has been full of coverage of law suits from women who had TVT and were left with a life time of pain and disability. They say the scandal is bigger than thalidomide. I saw my OBGYN who advised me not to risk pregnancy as it could erode my TVT and then I could be one of the women suffering. That could in fact happen at anytime anyway, but pregnancy increases the risk.

But I’m so broody. DH and I both just lost our mothers and both would really like to add to our family. We can afford it, our other children want a sibling. If it wasn’t for the surgery there would be no doubt in my mind.

So would I be unreasonable to take the risk?

My parents have 4 children and 9 grandchildren so far and I'm their youngest child at 26. The chances are high that you could have a number of grandchildren. If your youngest is 11 it may not even be as far off as 20 years.

My parents have 4 children and 9 grandchildren so far and I'm their youngest child at 26. The chances are high that you could have a number of grandchildren. If your youngest is 11 it may not even be as far off as 20 years.

I'll probably be roasted and shared out to feast on for this, but FGS.
You already have 3 beautiful children.
Be happy with it. Some poor women don't even get the chance to have 1 child.

Sorry to hear about your mums. I think I was a bit harsh before. However you losing your mum should really make you think. Do you want your children to go through that at such a young age. All children will say they want a new brother or sister.

Awwlookatmybabyspider I think most posters secretly agree with you.

Not so secretly, it’s what most have said, and I have basically agreed but simply said it’s hard to come to terms with.