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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How can you NOT get onto a motorway?

382 replies

purplecurtaindog · 31/10/2017 22:15

I have driven on motorways for many years and avaerge 15,000 miles some years as I drive for work. I consider myself a very confident yet safe driver. I have experience driving lorries and an extended professional license.

Never in my 20+ years of driving have I had trouble getting onto a motorway...

Yet my friend told me today that she was not able to join a motorway today, that she matched with speed of traffic but there were 'no gaps.' She got stranded at the end of the slip road, DC in car, and ended up getting a vehicle recovery service to come out and get her car as she was too scared to move onto the motorway from a stop.

She says it was not her fault and that this was not due to fault of her driving.

However I can't see how you could fail to get onto a motorway if you were merging correctly?

I've always matched my speed with the traffic, indicated right, ended up on carriageway. If the traffic is slower, you still match your speed! My guess is she want too fast or slow. Yet she insisted this was not her fault.

So AIBU to not see how a safe and competent driver can get stranded at the end of a slip road? And AIBU to ask if this has ever happened to anyone/ if they've witnessed it?

I personally never have in all my years of driving.

Friend has been driving for ten plus years. I did mention that this shouldn't happen and that it was very dangerous, but I wasn't harsh or rude.

Thank you.

OP posts:
Kitsharrington · 03/11/2017 08:00

It's a Mumsnet trope for people to smugly quote the Highway Code

Yes, what idiots, following the Highway Code!

NerrSnerr · 03/11/2017 08:09

Limited what are people supposed to quote when talking about rules about driving or should we be going by the** other popular saying ‘I have been driving for years and always done it like that’

ilovesouthlondon · 03/11/2017 09:00

It's happened to me too. Not every good driver is cut out for the motorway, myself included..

NewPapaGuinea · 03/11/2017 09:11

If everyone had the attitude of we're in this together and allow merging cars a few metres space the roads would flow so much smoother and quicker. Same for roundabouts. If people used them properly rather than treating them as some kind of race and honking people who "pull out" the roads would be a much nicer place.

Unfortunately many drivers are selfish and think their journey is more important than anyone elses. Learning to drive consists of rules and car handling when people also need to be taught how to drive in a way that is considerate to keeping the roads flowing. Going back to roundabouts, if people were more tolerant and didn't have such a selfish attitude that "I'm approaching from the right, it's my right of way and heaven help anyone who dares pull out and causes me a nano second of inconvenience" we wouldn't be having roundabouts pulled up and replaced with ghastly traffic lights that cause no end of congestion problems.

BlackBanana · 03/11/2017 10:33

It's happened to me too. Not every good driver is cut out for the motorway, myself included

If you can't drive on a motorway, you are not a good driver. And you shouldn't be on the road.

Fluffybrain · 03/11/2017 11:23

The DVLA don’t agree with you blackbanana.

Mumto2two · 03/11/2017 11:45

Well said Fluffy. If driving on motorways was required to be considered a 'good driver', then it would be part of the test. But it is not, and there are many people who have passed their test and are good drivers, but don't like driving on motorways. It's a rather narrow minded comment.

Haint · 03/11/2017 12:12

I drive on the motorway daily. I've never had a problem getting on but quite often there will be a wall of lorries bumper to bumper stretching for a mile, which makes getting off difficult

weasledee · 03/11/2017 12:46

This doesn’t need to happen!! As my driving instructor told me over 27 years ago.... it’s called the hard shoulder and emergency lane! If you can’t join the motorway u continue down the emergency lane until you can!!! Stopping on a motorway is a recipe for disaster Confused

Migraleve · 03/11/2017 14:19

As my driving instructor told me over 27 years ago.... it’s called the hard shoulder and emergency lane!

Erm, no it’s not Hmm

weasledee · 03/11/2017 14:21

Yes it is...
For emergency use!

Migraleve · 03/11/2017 14:25

It is not called the ‘hard shoulder and emergency lane’

rubybleu · 03/11/2017 14:58

the layout of the slip roads is different though, at least in WA. You can't really compare, slip roads in the Uk aren't designed in the same way. I would say perhaps they should be, but I have to say I didn't find it too much fun driving on the freeway there, either.

Perhaps, but as someone educated to drive overseas, I’ve never found it remotely difficult to join a UK motorway (or a European/North American) because we have been taught to join them safely. It is just so much safer being at least the same speed as the traffic - you can slow much faster than you can speed up.

weasledee · 03/11/2017 15:13

The name is irreverent in the grand scale of things, it’s just common sense to not stop at a motorway slip lane! Use the hard shoulder (or emergency lane) and
continue driving until it’s safe to join the motorway..... just pure common sense! Confused

Migraleve · 03/11/2017 15:17

The name is irreverent in the grand scale of things,

You made it relevant by claiming it was called a 'hard shoulder and emergency lane' and trying to use the description to prove your point though?

QuestionableMouse · 03/11/2017 15:46

I've just found out that one of my friends was killed by someone driving on the hard shoulder. He worked for the AA and was trying to recover a car.

All of you fucking idiots who think it's fine to drive on the hard shoulder need to rethink. It's not there to be used as a lane because you are too fucking useless to join the road properly.

Lweji · 03/11/2017 15:46

Use the hard shoulder (or emergency lane) and continue driving until it’s safe to join the motorway..... just pure common sense!

I'm curious. How long is that for? Until you crash into a car broken down on the hard shoulder? Or until you crash on the side of a bridge or a rail?

Should all cars continue along the hard shoulder until they all have gaps? Should the hard shoulder become another lane on the motorway?

Versus, waiting at the slip road for enough space. Just not at the very end, so that you have time to speed up.

I despair...

iveburntthetoast · 03/11/2017 15:51

There are dual carriageways with slip roads that don't have hard shoulders.

Lweji · 03/11/2017 15:51

In short, if you drive along the hard shoulder you are endangering yourself, anyone stopped on the hard shoulder and drivers on the motorway.
By stopping on the slip road, you're not endangering anyone, just waiting for a suitable gap.

Driving along the hard shoulder gives you a ticket and probably points on your licence.
Stopping on a slip road waiting for space to merge onto the motorway doesn't give you a penalty.

People will only "need" the hard shoulder if they speed up blindly hoping for a gap to magically appear.
If you adjust your speed so that you go slowly but can look for a gap then speed up to match motorway traffic speed, it's more likely that you won't have to stop on the slip road, nor have to use the hard shoulder.

caughtintherain · 03/11/2017 16:31

Your friend sounds a) extremely dangerous and b) like an idiot. She shouldn't be on the bloody road.

User452734838 · 03/11/2017 17:05

Most slips lead to the hard shoulder which means you can carry on if needed. For me, it's not the person on the slip roads fault but the people on the inside lane who don't allow for the fact that people are joining the motorway.

Migraleve · 03/11/2017 17:08

Most slips lead to the hard shoulder which means you can carry on if needed.

Why does it mean you oh carry on?

The solid white line along the hard shoulder is a HUGE clue that actually; you do no such thing.

Badbilly · 03/11/2017 17:09

People will only "need" the hard shoulder if they speed up blindly hoping for a gap to magically appear.
If you adjust your speed so that you go slowly but can look for a gap then speed up to match motorway traffic speed, it's more likely that you won't have to stop on the slip road, nor have to use the hard shoulder

Well, as previously mentioned, the only time I have ever done that it was because another driver had come to a complete stop on the slip road-I then had three choices,

1: Stop as well, and hope that the driver behind me is also aware of the situation, and paying attention, and not on his phone or changing the CD, or he/she might just crash into the back of me.

  1. Move around the obstruction in the road (because that indeed is what it is) by using the hard shoulder and joining the motorway safely -and once again hope that other drivers are paying attention and don't crash into the obstruction.
  1. Crash into the stopped vehicle

I chose number 2. Which in my opinion is the safest for me, and indeed for the idiot who has stopped, and I joined the motorway safely and had no problems at all. I was on the hard shoulder for less than 30 yards (which, if I was doing, say 50 MPH, would be about 1 second, or, just say I was doing 70, and the distance was 50 yards, it would still only be 2 seconds.)

So, what would you have done in the situation I was in?

Lweji · 03/11/2017 17:12

Badbilly

That was a special case, although if you kept enough distance from the car in front in relation to the speed you were travelling at, you'd be able to either stop in good time, or join the motorway before you reached the stopped car.

Migraleve · 03/11/2017 17:15

badbilly.* The situation you describe isnt difficult. The lines mean give way. If you approach any other junction with give way lines and there is a car stopped at them, you also stop. You don’t drive round them Confused.* I don’t see your point about the person behind you possibly changing a CD and not noticing you either, surely that is a very slim possibility which is present throughout your whole journey