To think driving to roads where there's good trick or treating is a bit wrong

[sahknowme]

We live in an area that puts a lot of effort into trick or treating (assumingly for the "local" kids). There's recently been a thread on a forum asking for streets/routes that are good to drive to for their kids to trick or treat, and our street has been mentioned.

AIBU to think this is a bit wrong/grabby, and we are doing it for our local area - not for randoms to drive from all over town?!

Ive only read the first page of comments but it's made me really sad. Necklaces so you know which kids to turn away as the arent lucky enough to live in an area that participates or indeed have accessable front doors. The latter is the case in vast parts of our city where children live in flat blocks. We are lucky to live in an area that goes all out but I'd welcome any chip despite their postcode. Of course the lack of opportunity in the most part goes hand in hand with social deprivation so again the children that already have the least are often the ones missing out. Very sad!

Seriously who opens the front door, inspects the kids for special badges, then teases them into singing a song, shows them sweets and still gives them nuts?

Vile doesn't cover it. I've never noticed where the kids come from when they trick or treat. We just want to look at their little costumes and see the excitement on their faces. You deserve someone to egg your door....i really really hope they did!

You either take part and give out sweets etc or you don't, and you don't decorate. It's sick to sit and sift through kids for who is 'eligible' and even sicker to hand out monkey nuts as a punishment. What an awful human being.

IME it’s the less well-off streets which attract a lot of trick or treaters (and door to door sellers!) There is less distance between the doorbells of terraced homes with no garden than detached houses with long driveways!

intercom

That seems to be the case in this village

And some people on the navy estate go all out

Last night whilst out with the children T or T I noticed a car following us around the roads and it was a family who drove around looking for decorated houses and literally drove to each house and let the kids out to get treats and then drove off to the next. It felt so creepy. It is one thing driving to a good area and getting out and walking round but driving from street to street practically on our heels felt so grabby.

We went out around the streets for an hour then came back to ours and put our pumpkin out and gave to the kids who knocked then so a bit of give and take. Lots of houses were decorated with lit pumpkins but no one home that it was weird but we had a fun evening.

We're in a go-to area. Kids getting dropped off, lots of secondary school kids. Decorated our house and welcomed lots of treaters. But my own kids missed out becauseany of our neighbours had ran out of candy within 30 minutes. So it does feel very unfair and I have noticed less houses participating this year. It's the backlash to being a "go-to" street.

Yes Anne that sounds like it was all about getting the free sweets. What I like about Halloween is walking around bumping into neighbours and school parents. It’s sociable and fosters a sense of community. How can driving around in the car be fun?

We've just moved house, and we moved from an area that has what OFSTED regard as great schools, and is consequently nappy valley in the Cotswolds. Last year, we had 200 little packs of sweeties... and ran out. This year, we did the same, but in this area we only handed out 20 odd.

Our kids are slightly gutted as we make a big deal of Hallowe'en - theme it every year as Harry Potter, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Gruffalo, etc etc etc as it overlaps with a birthday. I'd love it if loads of kids turned up at ours as they did in our old village - it's manic, there; streets thronged. I'm wondering now if people come to that area because they know it's going to be a big deal?

I guess it depends, but personally I wouldn't mind at all if they did - I mind more that it's not so popular here! When the sweets are gone, they're gone, after all - as long as some small people are benefiting, does it really matter? Mine were genuinely sad this year, as the communal aspect of a big Hallowe'en event means more to them than the sweets do, so the lack of doorbell rings and related excitement were a bit of a letdown.

intercom you have to be a pretty high earner to live in a terraced house round here. My daughters friends who have doctors and lawyers for parents all live in 2 bed flats!

I don't do tick or treating here anymore because I think ours is one of "those" streets. Last year I ended up with more than 20 kids on the doorstep at once, all pushing and grabbing. The toddlers at the front were getting squashed and I had to put on my grumpy teacher voice to sort it out. I didn't recognise any of them from our street and DD was terrified. The parents were all stood watching about from 3 or 4 houses away and made no effort to intervene.

I honestly couldn't give a shit about where the child knocking on my door comes from. They could come from Manchester, Market Harborough or Mars for all I care. They are out having fun and if I didn't want to take part I would not buy sweets or answer the door.

Couldn't agree more with Dalecooper. For those of you getting a tizz on about this, get a life!

Driving to another area seems OTT if it’s only about the sweets. Spend the petrol money on sweets instead 😀🍭🍬

While I wouldn’t send away those I didn’t recognise, once the treats are gone then that’s it 🎃

I live in an area where trick or treating is NOT a thing. At all. Last night we drove somewhere that was, and knocked on a few houses so my kids could join in. Do I feel bad? No.

We moved last summer to a village with very little houses and older population so we have taken ds back to our old street the last 2 years to T+T with our old next door neighbour not because this is particularly seen as the go to street but so he had someone to do it with and spend time with his friend that he doesn't see so much of these days.

That said we did have some trick-or-treaters yesterday I don't think I've ever met one of them no idea where they came from but it didn't bother me

Intercom, it is not just about getting sweets. We could all go to the shops and get armfuls of them if we pleased. It is about taking part in a fun activity. Do you really not get that?

Just hate this trick or treating which has nothing at all to do with Halloween. Live in what is regarded as a "good area". Last night kids would be disappointed as no sweets given out, just don't go with giving sweets to kids especially when I don't know who they are. Last night gave out napkins containing either party novelties or a small notebook and pen. Did have one parent say he was really happy with no sweets, more should do it. Whilst giving a "treat" still don't think this habit is justifiable. Basically begging!

If you go to a different area to trick or treat, would you consider taking some sweets yourself to give to one of the well decorated houses? So then they could have more to give out but don’t have to pay as much? I would appreciate that. Especially from people I know.

"Last year I ended up with more than 20 kids on the doorstep at once, all pushing and grabbing."

Yes, no more than 5 at a time is best - I can see why large battalions go round together but it would be good for parents to divide them into smaller groups when they go to knock on doors.

They ring the bell when there is a sign on the door, no decorations out, the outside lights are off and the inhabitants are clearly not wanting to be disturbed.

Just follow the etiquette and sod off. The road is full of children and they have lights on etc. so just go there and let me sleep when I am ill.

I bought this great full size creepy zombie put him at the front door with a bowl full of sweets. Dd was too scared to go trick or treating so we sat in wait. Not one trick or treater 😞 we live in an area of older people would of been happy to have had anyone.

One of the reasons we don’t do it. It’s a massive thing on an estate in the neighbouring village where school friends are but nothing in our hamlet so we would have to drive 2 miles to beg from people we don’t really know. Sits ill with me.

My kids have never done trick or treat and you can’t miss what you don’t know.

I think kids should go to their street and local streets unless they are at a playdate and tagging along. Driving in from the other side of town does sound grabby. A facebook page about my town had someone asking where are the good streets to go ToT, I was

I've just taken my Haribo and Moams packs to a neighbour as no one came last night. Her sons (8 & 10) are in a small local football club. She agreed that they would be appreciated at the weekend!

That is not in the spirit of it. Wherever they live, they will get some answering the door and some not. They have a bit of fun and go home. Its not about maximizing yield. It doesn't matter if their bag of sweets ends up half as big as it would be in a "good" area. It is not about that.

Fair enough if people who live in a rural location to drive to their nearest urban area but it is poor taste to be recommending good or bad areas.

The novelty wears off. Its nice to see a few dressed up but if the door doesn't stop going all night because people are coming from far and wide, people won't bother at all.