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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think driving to roads where there's good trick or treating is a bit wrong

447 replies

sahknowme · 30/10/2017 23:38

We live in an area that puts a lot of effort into trick or treating (assumingly for the "local" kids). There's recently been a thread on a forum asking for streets/routes that are good to drive to for their kids to trick or treat, and our street has been mentioned.

AIBU to think this is a bit wrong/grabby, and we are doing it for our local area - not for randoms to drive from all over town?!

OP posts:
CakeLoving · 31/10/2017 22:13

@SonyaY wow that is so depressing. Makes me think you're in the rich north London area I just moved out of. Just such a sad, mean spirited attitude.

Goshthatwentwell · 31/10/2017 22:18

Cake that's the impact of a horribly over commercialised event. Have you not read the posters describing van loads of people coming in from all over?
If it's just locals you give and receive. Driving round town looking for easy pickings is nuts.

Original poster
sahknowme · 31/10/2017 22:21

My elderly (infirm) mother came to visit, and they weren't able to park anywhere near my house thanks to the all the cars that had driven down to ToT.

Was absolutely manic for a while - houses and cars egged for no reason. It's usually such a nice area :(

Only a few sweeties eh?

OP posts:
Frillyhorseyknickers · 31/10/2017 22:30

I live two miles out of the village on a farm, we don't trick or treat, however my friend drives her little girls over each year so they can trick or treat us, without bussing them down to some random street. Our village do operate a good parent run trick or treating circuit and on the village leaflet it advises the times they will be visiting and th pumpkin rule, and also suggests no one answer their door to trick or treaters after X time, which discourages older kids.

PIL live in the village and said they had lots of tiddlers with parents and not many grown ups. I don't think it's fair for people to drive to other villages or streets to trick or treat.

FloraFox · 31/10/2017 22:40

Gosh have you not read Sonya's post where she says she wants the other kids to know they're getting second best so they won't come back? The local kids are getting bags of sweets and change (!) while the other kids get monkey nuts. I think that's horrible.

Piggy I quite liked monkey nuts when I was a kid too. Usually they were from poorer people who couldn't afford to give out sweets, not from people who just didn't like the cut of your jib.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 31/10/2017 22:52

I found a picture of SonyaY and her DH

To think driving to roads where there's good trick or treating is a bit wrong
MissEliza · 31/10/2017 22:55

We live in a ‘good’ street where people come from other neighbourhoods. It’s not the cost of buying sweets for all the kids who knock that bothers me. It’s the selfishness of the adults. Maybe if they stuck around their streets and decorated their houses and gave out sweets, it would encourage others in the street to do the same. I know lots of the people that come from other neighbourhoods. Those streets aren’t full of elderly people but families (most of whom come to our street).
I like Halloween because I like the effort I and my neighbours go to to make it fun for the kids. I just wish others who realise it’s nice to give as well as receive.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 31/10/2017 22:58

This whole “our local children and local community, they’re being DEPRIVED damn you” is bollocks because -

  • it’s fucking sweets. I can assure you that children are not deprived of sweets on Halloween. We only stopped at a dozen houses and DD got half a bucketful. Children don’t need a tonne of sugary crap. All it means is they’ll get 5 fewer bags of Haribo than if the ‘blow ins’ didn’t come in.
  • not every child lives in a ‘community’ setting. Some kids lives above shops, in town centres, in flats, where no one around them has a pumpkin welcoming them. Not quite fair they are deprived of that, I would certainly be venturing where they’ll be getting half a chance of having a good ToT
  • it’s a bloody appalling lesson to ‘badge’ children as being more important against ‘council house’ children. What horrible entitled snobs they’ll turn out to be. I can bet as well your community isn’t as posh as it likes to think it is
  • monkey nuts are delicious so the joke is on you 🥜
CherryChasingDotMuncher · 31/10/2017 22:59

Also how do you know where the ‘blow ins’ live?? How do you know they don’t have a DH at home handing out sweets to their ToT’ers?

Goshthatwentwell · 31/10/2017 23:01

Flora, yes read the whole thread. Yes a bit harsh but why should the local children miss out to the hoards. We get literally 100's turning up after the majority of the estate made an effort. Every year less and less do anything as it's just too expensive so supply the whole town.
Our estate got so bad so others turning up tha we suggested charging people coming in. That way at least we could use the event to benefit our community.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 31/10/2017 23:03

Children aren’t more deserving of sweets just because they live near people who give out lots of sweets.

How on earth do you charge people to enter the street Confused

fevversbetterout · 31/10/2017 23:14

Had a good evening here. Small children chapped the door with their parents, and some larger ones on their own. Didn't know any of them. They weren't wearing badges or tags. Looked like young people to me. No idea if they were locals or "blow ins".

FloraFox · 31/10/2017 23:17

why should the local children miss out to the hoards

What are they missing out? I bet they're having a lot of fun with all the crowds of extra kids running around, unless they've taken on their parents' views that they don't want to associate with the hordes. They can only be missing out on either an extra few bags of sweets that they don't need anyway or an opportunity to mingle with their neighbours without the hordes. Lovely.

We get hundreds here too. If you are using Hallowe'en to teach your kids they deserve more than the kids from "over there", do us all a favour and don't celebrate it.

MummySparkle · 31/10/2017 23:20

So what about my DCs if they want to go trick or treating? We live in the absolute middle of nowhere on a narrow lane that isn’t safe to even walk to our neighbors front door in the dark.

ZombieVampireHedgehog · 31/10/2017 23:38

My DC's went & got a bucket full, so if people did drive from elsewhere it didn't affect his yield

ArcheryAnnie · 31/10/2017 23:40

We didn't get a single knock on the door! And now we have 50 48 37 mini haribo bags we simply have to finish!

FloraFox · 31/10/2017 23:42

Your DCs must go without MummySparkle. No time like a fun holiday for them to learn that some things are not for them. Halloween Hmm

justalittlelemondrizzle · 01/11/2017 00:17

We used to live in an area that was very good. Went trick or treating every year there and since we've moved have always gone back there to do the same 'circuit' that we used to. Plus we often bump into the dc's friends there too. Does that count? It's never been a conscious thing due to it being a generous area. I suppose it's just our routine.

Migraleve · 01/11/2017 00:20

I’m so shocked by the replies on this thread. Some people are just so shitty.

We are talking about giving some sweeties to children. There is so much campaigning going on worldwide for things like LGBT rights and sexism issues but people are going to exclude some little kids because they don’t live in he right area? Fucking hell thats grim. Proper low.

Namethecat · 01/11/2017 00:25

Lived in my place for 5 years. Never had a trick and treat knock at the door.

Piggywaspushed · 01/11/2017 07:09

I love this idea that somehow you are a lesser person if you haven't decorated your own house and made an effort and somehow this makes you 'selfish' . Goodness me, call the parenting police!

I can't believe we have got to a point where people are publishing leaflets with circuits!

I know if my estate did this my house would be left out as I am not one of the 'gang' having DCs who didn't go to the local school as young children - village life, eh?.

I think sometimes the ostentations house decorator types don't realise how much they isolate and exclude other people - this reminds me of the other thread where there was a party for local children only and a woman got uninvited!

fucksakefay · 01/11/2017 08:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hoppinggreen · 01/11/2017 08:04

The next road over from us have a reputation for putting on a good Halloween.
My dc went down there as part of a general trip around the neighbourhood and said it was crazy with traffic jams and loads of cars parked up!!
One lady there told me she had almost 200 visitors last night and the pictures on FB were nuts
To be fair though only the houses that want to do it join in but I do feel sorry for the ones with just a solitary pumpkin outside that would probably like a few visitors but get the hordes turning up.

NewPapaGuinea · 01/11/2017 08:20

I still laugh at when I was a teenager bring given a lecture about God, that halloween was worshipping the devil and sent on my way with a 7inch record of hymns.

WhyamIBoredathome · 01/11/2017 08:26

I guess it's a problem if an area gets such a reputation as being a good ToT Street that it gets inundated so locals just give up doing it, then their own kids miss out.
Some of our neighbours counted 250 kids that knocked last night, which is of course far far more than live here. I had only bought sweets for about 40 and expected to have loads left as in our old house we'd have about 10 kids all night. Last night they were knocking in groups of 10 at once.
Some kids knocked even after I'd taken pumpkin in and stuck a note up saying we'd run out.