Uninvited to Halloween party :(

[Annoyedbaby]

Just wanted a few opinions on this really as I'm not sure what to do... fairly first world problem but it's got me really prickled

My lovely friend invited my 8 yr old DS to her village's Halloween party. Low key village hall affair, £5 entrance, the more the merrier kind of thing.
DS super excited, we've got the costume ...first time he's ever wanted to dress up... all good!

Then another mum from the village (and also a mum from my DS's school) then told my friend (pretty rudely apparently) that my DS can't go as only the children in the village are allowed to go. She knows my DS thinks he's going.

AIBU to think that this is mean, petty and unnecessary
What would you lovely peeps do?

Ridiculous - mainly because you have actually been invited already. Please take him, he doesn't deserve to be let down and I'm sure while this bitch woman will possibly be very PA, she's hardly going to turn away an 8 year old. He doesn't deserve to have his excitement dashed by her :(

They'll know DS isn't from the village because they know him ....
I'm fairly sure it's just the one mum who has this issue though x

You don't actually know that this woman (let's call her Tubs) is an organiser.

Even if Tubs is involved in the organisation, does she have ownership of the event? Presumably it is organised by a not for profit? Authority usually lies with a committee.

It would be very unusual to set the terms you describe; if it is the case, I would assume they will clearly advertise the postcodes that are eligible. Given this is almost certainly not the case, it is probably just Tubs' personal view.

Personally, I would not alter my plans on the off chance that Tubs' personal bias is an actual rule. I think it's an important skill to politely explain to nutters why their assumptions don't affect you.

I get the maybe each child attending gets a prize/present thing but it’s not rocket science, surely you just buy a present per ticket sold?! It’s incredibly mean of tubs and her local party for local people.

@Onceuponatime21

"We live in an area with a lot of small villages and the parties here tend to be by village and not open to everyone."

Are you talking about publicly advertised, charged, ticketed events?

I'm not at all sure it's legal to ban people who 'aren't local' from public events in this manner. Certainly not to sell them tickets and then ban them.

They couldn't possibly enforce this once they've sold the ticket which doesn't have any restrictions. He should just go.

Pengggwn I totally see where you're coming from
But this mum knows me, and she knows DS and he's a gentle kid
But like I said, I think I'll just leave it x

We've not been sold the ticket yet...
as I understand, it's a ticket on the door type of thing
Sorry if I wasn't clear x

Pengywnn she is being a bitch though. Another woman from the village invited her, OP has paid for her tickets. She was then rude to the other mum, and she knows that OP's DS thinks she's going to the party. It's one child, it's not like they've opened the flood gates to all the village outliers; this will be evident by the amount of tickets sold.

Have you got a ticket?

If so, surely he wouldn't be turned away?

What an arsehole of a woman.

I would go anyway.

Sorry didn't realise you hadn't got your ticket yet but surely some common decency and goddamn niceness wouldn't be so amiss when it pertains to a halloween party for children? Goodness. Maybe I'm in the wrong here, who bloody knows. I would feel awful and would take my son but completely understand if you want to compensate him with something else OP

Bitch = horrible word?

@Pengywnn a bitch is a bitch.

I really think you should still go, I bet you won’t be the only ones from outside the village there anyway. No doubt other people will have invited their family and friends to come along especially as it’s to raise money, not like it’s a private party.

Other mum just sounds like she’s being a mean cow and one of those types who feels superior and hates outsiders.

Go and have fun. No one else will bat an eyelid.

Oops, Xpost!

You do need to clarify somehow-would be awful to be turned away on the night.

I would have thought whether or not she's a "bitch" might depend on whether or not it is village only & she was just informing Op's friend (albeit rudely), or whether or not she's making it up to exclude Op's son.

Maybe shes jealous of you & ypur friend.

Where did that come from? For all we know village nay-sayer is beautiful, rich, healthy, with a stellar career and tons of friends. OP and her friends might not be. Or it is the other way around. But we would need a hell of a lot more information to suggest jealousy.

Well I'm sorry if I offended your delicate sensibilities but I genuinely think there is some kind of malice or power trip behind this woman's motives. Therefore, I feel like she's being a bitch to the OP and her poor DS.

But if numbers are limited to children of the village only , then OP would not have had a chance to buy a ticket , because they would have been strictly limited to children of the village and therefore a set number Pengggwyn ?

OP without giving too much away , it sounds as though your child attends a school which is in a village or near a village having a Halloween party and one of the organisers has decided it is more exclusive than other organisers thought ?

I live in a small village, Christmas parties that the children are given a gift etc are usual for villagers only but these certainly aren't charging an entrance fee and funds are usually raised within the village. Any other things that charge an entrance fee we are usually glad of whoever turns up to be fair.

I'd personally go, just stay you are stopping over if she asks but I doubt she will