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AIBU?

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Original poster

Straw-poll please - Do you make breakfast for your DH /DP?

342 replies

rumginger · 25/10/2017 17:42

I told DH at 8am I would put this on MN and give him feedback, but he has no clue about this really.

I do usually make him breakfast in the mornings because I'm doing it for the DC as well, so fine. However, we're now into the second week of half-term which means I don't strictly need to be up at 6.30, but I'm kind of in the habit and the cats need feeding anyway. So this morning I had made him poached eggs with salmon on muffins and this is what he actually said to me - "Is there no hollandaise sauce with this?"

Firstly, as if anyone can be bothered to be faffing with egg yolks that early. Secondly, I told him most people would be lucky to get breakfast made for them at all. I don't think I am BU, but could MN please confirm that he is on his own planet to even ask such a question?

Thankyou.

OP posts:
shhhfastasleep · 26/10/2017 18:46

My wartime generation parents didn’t do this either. In fact, my Dad cooked for us loads.

Original poster
rumginger · 26/10/2017 18:58

Well god knows why I do then Confused. There are some conversations (like this kind of thing) where I would get more response from the cat. If I said to him I couldn't keep on top of the house, he would just say "get the cleaner todo more hours". It would never occur to him to hoover there and then. He has never hoovered or dusted or changed the beds, I don't think. He will put his muddy sports kit in the machine, but never wonder about how it gets dry. But in other ways, I can ask him anything - e.g. If I needed something from the shop at midnight he'll go, no bother. Or he'll always taxi the kids about anywhere, that kind of thing.

OP posts:
shhhfastasleep · 26/10/2017 19:05

It’s not your domestic dynamic but maybe your children could do with seeing a few tweaks. I don’t know how old they are but you need to think about what they are learning about male self reliance or lack of it. Maybe as they get older get them doing more for themselves (or treating you!).

maddiemookins16mum · 26/10/2017 19:07

I make my DP breakfast every morning. He's up first, feeds the cat and does her litter tray. Then brings me tea in bed.
I get up 10 mins after and he's normally just got in the shower. He then shaves.
As soon as I hear the annoying tapping of his razor against the sink, I make his breakfast.
Now, this may make me a 50's Housewife, but two slices of breast toasted to a golden brown, smeared with butter and topped with Roses grapefruit marmalade and a fresh mug of tea is not really a chore in my book.
He'll get porridge in a few weeks and god forbid on a Sunday if he's working I'll do a bacon butty.
But, poached eggs and hollandaise is a step too far (plus I have no idea how to make it).

maddiemookins16mum · 26/10/2017 19:09

I meant bread not breasts, sorry 😳😳

UnicornSlippers · 26/10/2017 19:12

Nah. He brings me a cuppa in bed every morning, though Grin. He's an early riser, I love my sleep.

We all get our own breakfasts in our house (older DC). I might make the odd weekend fry-up for us all.

Notonthestairs · 26/10/2017 19:23

Why isn't he feeding the cat?
Go mad and have a lie in occasionally - you'll never look back Grin

(I don't make breakfast for DH and he gets home later than your DH - it's an irrelevant fact but you seemed to think his home time was pertinent to your breakfast making so I thought I'd throw it in).

lljkk · 26/10/2017 19:27

I don't make ME breakfast before going to work.
When I was a SAHM, DH left for work before I was awake, too.

Original poster
rumginger · 26/10/2017 19:52

The cats don't go to him even if he's up super early for a run. Instead they sit around my head to wake me up and the loudest one howls.

OP posts:
Notonthestairs · 26/10/2017 20:22

Hhhhmmm I suspect that as you feed the cats in the main they will come to you. If DH fed them on a regular basis they'd be harassing him. It would take a bit of consistency and willingness on his part however.
But if you are looking for ways not to have a lie in keep at it Grin

listsandbudgets · 26/10/2017 23:11

First of all OP please may I come and live with you. I promise that if I want hollandaise sauce I'll buy my own ready made jar and share it with you and I'll even make the coffee.

I sometimes make DP breakfast at the weekend - usually a bacon or sausage sandwich but normally its toast, cereal, tea or pastries if I feel like treating myself the DCs.

We normally do school run together and then go on to work as we work close to each other and 2 mornings a week DD is in early (8am) for before school activities so we book DS into breakfast club and then go to a cafe - DP pays Grin

listsandbudgets · 26/10/2017 23:13

and insist he buys you one of these then have a lie in

Purple52 · 26/10/2017 23:50

By prepare DH breakfast I'm assuming you probably don't include ordering cereal, milk and bread etc from Sainsbury's, having it delivered, putting it away (ok sometimes he puts it away).
Technically if I didn't do the ordering there would be no food for breakfast, or any other meal!!

OP - stay in bed in the morning!!!

JaneJeffer · 27/10/2017 00:05

No. He's gone to work by the time I get up (thank God) but even if he wasn't I still wouldn't. I'm not a morning person and he gets on my wick in the morning being all chatty and annoying.

gamerchick · 27/10/2017 00:19

You’ve spoiled and pampered your husband to the point that he expects it as your role. This is partly your fault.

That comment in your first post would have had me pull the plug on the breakfasts without asking anyone else. If you want to be taken for granted that’s your lookout but if In the event that you are physically unable to do what you do your man will get a huge shock.

You’re not doing him any favours here.

Sashkin · 27/10/2017 00:28

I’m going to assume he has never made hollandaise sauce, and thus has no idea what he is asking.

I have made hollandaise exactly once, and it was an almighty pain. And wasn’t thick enough. If DH wants eggs benedict now he can take me out for posh brunch Grin

I do occasionally put some cereal in a bowl for him at weekends, but he is in charge of any cooked breakfasts. It’s every man for themselves on weekdays.

AdoraBell · 27/10/2017 00:34

No. We are flexible. Whoever wakes up first, him 95% of the time, makes the Brew and he will often offer me breakfast when he is doing his own. And now that DD are fully fledged teens I don’t do their’s either.

I am willing to do the dog’s brekkie though because if I allowed them access they’d eat a months worth of food in 1 go.

missiondecision · 27/10/2017 00:36

No I don’t do breakfast

Myheartbelongsto · 27/10/2017 00:37

I can't believe some of these replies.

My boyfriend would always offer me something to eat if he was making something for himself.

CupcakeEater · 27/10/2017 00:49

I don't tend to eat breakfast, when I do dp normally cooks for me as he has breakfast every day...

dogskidsandcats · 27/10/2017 07:13

I make breakfast on Saturdays- if he’s lucky!

Ktown · 27/10/2017 07:23

No
I get breakfast in bed ( nothing exciting mind you). We’ve agreed the day this stops I’m off!

MissMogwai · 27/10/2017 07:35

Nope. Monday to Friday it's every man or indeed woman for themselves in this house. Your DP should think himself very lucky!

At the weekend if my DP fancies a fry up he will make it for those who want one.
I will make pancakes or waffles now and again, but as I have lazy teens who don't surface until late, it's very rare.

Minidoghugs · 27/10/2017 08:05

I do make my dd a cooked breakfast as I think it's good for her to have some eggs and if Dh wanted some I would make him some too. But he just grabs something when he fancies it.
Moaning there was no hollandaise sauce with his poached egg and smoked salmon! What can I say?

JigglyTuff · 27/10/2017 08:07

This is a joke, right?

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