Woman on bus got people to move for her toddler

[questioning1]

Not sure whether AIBU or not. Was on the rush hour bus this morning (in London) sitting on one of those raised high up seats at the very front of the bus.

A lady with a baby in a pram and a toddler (maybe 3?) got on the bus. She walked down the aisle past me and parked her pram, and said to the bus at large, 'Can someone move for my son please?'

I was always brought up to think that children make room for adults - for example they give up a seat for someone, not the other way round. Anyway a few mins later I turned around again and the woman was sitting in a priority seat with her son on her lap!

AIBU to think that 1) she shouldn't have asked for a seat for her son and 2) she shouldn't have sat in a priority seat herself once it had been vacated?

She then got off two stops later! I'm genuinely not sure if it's just me or not.

Anyone can pull a quote off the internet that 'proves' anything. You do know that camellia

"The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers."

Socrates (469–399 B.C.)

CherryChasingDotMuncher, how original, must have taken you forever to to think that one up, back in your box "love"

I was on a bus recently and a frail elderly person with two walking aids shuffled slowly on and stood in front of the priority seat (for some time, shockingly) and had to ask two children to move, parents ingored the whole interaction. The less able-bodied always has priority. Small children can be held, standing or seated on lap. A whole generation of young people are being raised to just not see other people around them and consider the needs of others

Elderly or disabled people should be offered a seat of course.

However, some posters on here believe children should offer their seats to any adult even if they are perfectly healthy and able bodied, purely due to the fact that they are an adult.

Anyone can pull a quote off the internet that 'proves' anything. You do know that camellia

Don't display your ignorance so overtly. I merely said that this piece of current research suggests the current trend of falling empathy/regard for others. It's very bad form in science to state that something 'proves' an effect. And it's the abstract of a peer-reviewed research paper, not a quote. It's actually a very interesting paper if you could be bothered to read it!

I disagree op. I think a child certainly of that age should have priority over an adult.
Why should children make room for adults? It's 2017, what age are you living in??

So if current children and selfish entitled snowflakes and that is the fault of "Generation me" who are also selfish entitled snowflakes then whose fault is it really?????

Seeya 😂😂

So you think of this had been a father rather than a mother the OP would still have posted?

This thread is bonkers. We should martyr our 3yo children and risk them falling for perfectly able bodied adults otherwise they’re ‘snowflakes’.

You can tell it’s half term

Not sure 'fault' can be pinned down so easily FormerlyFrikadela
, seems to be an ongoing societal trend with many different causes/factors, I personally find it worrying though.

Don't display your ignorance so overtly.

I have a PhD of my own thanks very much, so enough with the superiority. Some random admonishment on the internet isn't making much impact on my sense of self worth, thanks.

CherryChasingDotMuncher, in answer to your pretty sensible question yes I do, for me the gender of the person makes no difference, my opinion wouldn't change just because a man was asking the question.

"Lazy parenting". What, because people don't make their children jump out of their seats for able bodied adults?
Alrighty then. Whatever you say.

I don't think it's today's children who are entitled little snowflakes.

I have a PhD of my own thanks very much, so enough with the superiority. Some random admonishment on the internet isn't making much impact on my sense of self worth, thanks.

You have mentioned your own PhD (unasked) and self worth (irrelevant) in the same sentence, hidden message there Laurie?!

If you do indeed have a PhD I'm suprised at your initial response to be honest, given that I used the word suggested not proved. I would've expected someone educated to PhD level to posess slightly better critical thnking skills. Ah well!

I can't believe some people think a toddler should have their safety risked (take Peanut's 3 year old who ended up with a bloody nose) just so that adults can feel 'respected.' It's abhorrent.

To be honest, I'm only dipping into this thread while doing something else (that I really should be focusing on,) so I'm not actually paying that much attention (I save my best thinking for my actual job, believe it or not).

Not sure 'fault' can be pinned down so easily FormerlyFrikadela
, seems to be an ongoing societal trend with many different causes/factors, I personally find it worrying though

I know no one is at fault because there is no fault to find. It's just you see it all the time of people complaining of entitled snowflakes as if, were it true, it's the actual persons fault rather than the fault of those who raised them.
Society changes and evolves and how we raise children changes with it. I don't believe we have entitled snowflakes but I don't think we achieve anything by accusing an entire generation of being that way.

This again! Nope, I don't teach my kids to give up their seats for able bodied adults. I'm an able-bodied adult, I don't see myself as more entitled to a seat than they are, and then there's the whole 'They didn't pay a full fare!' Well, a lot of companies charge full fares to kids over a certain age and well, people on free bus passes don't pay a full fare, either, but many are as able-bodied as I am and I wouldn't expect them to give up their seat for me, either.

Yeah I wouldn't expect an 8yp to get up for me and nor would I get up for Ann 8yo.

I would get up for a parent with a small child.

I would absolutely give up a seat for a small child. Cant stand the "respect your elders" bollocks.

The effect of automatic respect for and deference to elders by younger people is that it allowed respected people to get away with systematically abusing younger people and any one else who was "less deserving" of respect. I'm very glad to live in a society where I no longer have to "know my place".

I find people generally are more likely to be rude the older they are, up and until those who are 75+ who remember WW2 and rationing, they are mostly lovely.

Young people and kids today are mostly fantastic.

elfinpre

The effect of automatic respect for and deference to elders by younger people is that it allowed respected people to get away with systematically abusing younger people and any one else who was "less deserving" of respect. I'm very glad to live in a society where I no longer have to "know my place".

There are bad apples in every generation. I get on a bus twice a day Mon - Fri, on the way home kids also get on it, 75% of them are fine but the rest are swearing, shouting and being pests to the other passengers, imo this shows a total lack of respect for other people (regardless of age), they are racist, ageist and sexist, this is learned behaviour and I can only surmise that they are learning it from parents or that the parents just couldn't care less and are busier with more important things (FB and Instagram), most of the kids take seats (and why not) but is it asking too much that when someone with a disability, someone elderly and frail or a pregnant woman gets on that they show some compassion and offer their seat? I've done it many a time, but then I was raised and not dragged up!

If someone asked I would - not sure I'd offer it automatically, unless I was in the front seats. There's a school on my bus route at rush hour and all the DC stand pretty much and older people sit. I only get a seat about one day in 50 though so not something that comes up much!

I can't believe how many people would let their toddler take up an adult seat when an adult got on the bus! I would be completely mortified to do this!

Respect your elders is something that should still be respected! Fair enough if there is a situation where your child is being disrespected, shamed or otherwise hurt by an adult - but for the sake of a bus seat!! Toddlers should not be taking one up, end of story.

How many toddlers do you see flying through the air when a bus brakes?! So they trip over; you pick them up, brush them down, and move on. They aren't much safer on a seat seeing as busses don't have seatbelts!!

No wonder kids these days are growing up to be entitled little buggers.

It's damn good manners, it's respect, it's decent behaviour. Most decent, respectful and polite people do it.

No, it's extremely rude and bigoted. Your manners and sense of entitlement are appalling!