To ask parents to turn down volume.

[Borntobeamum]

Sat in a nice restaurant in a hotel.
DH and I are celebrating and sat at the next table is a Mum and dad and their son- aged about 4. He’s watching you tube videos. With the sound on full.
Restaurant is full so can’t move tables.
The parents are both on their phones too.
There’s no interaction. Just tinny noises as they click on various pages.
WIBU to ask them to start up a conversation with their little boy. I could give them some ideas if they’re stuck!

Who cares what you think.

Spikey someone who for any of a number of reasons (hearing loss, sensory issues, etc etc) has a problem with electronic noises is in an otherwise quiet cafe. You want to use a noisy electronic device. Do you think
a) they should be able to continue to use the cafe in peace?
b) they should sit in the cafe despite being unable to communicate with others because they can't hear anything (or get increasingly anxious/in pain, if they have sensory issues) and eventually get distressed?
c) they should leave?

You don't seem to understand that your needs don't necessarily trump other people's. They might do, sometimes, but it isn't an automatic thing, and you should be prepared to listen, and negotiate, and try and find a solution which, while not perfect, works for everyone. You need to be aware that not everybody is the goady cunt you seen to assume they are, and that other people may have a great deal more direct experience of disability than you do.

NannyOgg - screaming babies?! What would you like the parents to do with them? Put them out in the cold? Smother them? Just get up immediately from their meal and run out of the restaurant for you? Just have a tiny bit of empathy.

There are a few themes running through this thread as there always are.
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How other people choose to eat a meal whether it be chatting, reading a paper, sitting silently or playing on a phone or ipad is literally none of your business. They may also decide to have ketchup with their ice cream, again none of your business. It doesn't make you a better parent if your child colours, sits quietly or chats about the political fall out of brexit. Literally nobody else cares.
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Some children (and adults) need to use devices in order to access public places because they help them either communicate or regulate themselves. That will not be true for all people with disabilities or even people with similar disabilities but it is true for some. Not every child with a device will have a need for it but some will and you can't tell which are which just by looking at them most of the time. So while you're giving dirty looks at a family you have decided are just lazy, they could be that family who are struggling and really need that device.
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Loud blaring noises are irritating to many but can be very difficult to deal with for people with their own sensory issues. The latter could well also belong in the group that need devices to cope. It is perfectly reasonable to expect people to use headphones or have the sound turned low so that it can't be heard over the ridiculously loud music many restaurants like to play.
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No it isn't appropriate to expect people with disabilities or their families to divulge a diagnosis in order for you to be placated that they are part of the deserving few.
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OP I would make a complaint to the management about the staff's handling of the situation. They may have a policy of not making requests to turn down devices but then at least you'll know not to frequent their establishment again.

@zzzzz that was me, not Nanny. I don't like electronic noise, either - it really bothers me. I know lots of other people who hate it, too. Please stop trying to paint Nanny as some sort of weird outlier in the hates-electronic-noise-in-otherwise-quiet-cafes department, because she's not.

Good lord. There seems to be a plague of misunderstanding.

I’ve made my views very clear and i’m not going to continue this stupid circular argument. Try re-reading what I’ve already written if you are struggling with the concept of courtesy.

You can continue with your whataboutery now. I’m off.

Step away, do you really sit in restaurant with a screaming baby? Why? You’re miserable, everyone in the restaurant is miserable and so is the baby. I’ve left a cafe when my son was screaming- he’s too young for restaurants.

Buzzy machines playing games, cartoons or whatever make my best friends hearing aid useless. She ends up just smiling and nodding as she cannot hear the conversation at her own table.

I find it very hard to believe that all of the children who sit in public like this have special needs.

There is a strange attitude on MN that we must all shut up and tolerate every kind of annoyance or rude behaviour just in case the person had a disability. This seems to be doing a bit of a disservice to people with disabilities to me.

Are people proposing that we abandon all standards of behaviour in public?

Should we tolerate drunks? After all, some kinds of fits or strokes can make a person appear intoxicated.

Old enough to sit and eat and not scream.

That of course, depends on the child.

Oh and not leave food all over the floor (trip hazard with hot drinks and foot, as well as hygiene and extra work for staff) or run around the restaurant which is very, very dangerous.

I’ve done many waiting jobs and have little patience for children behaving inappropriately in restaurants.

A cafe for twenty minutes maybe. An actual restaurant? Hell no!

What’s the bloody point?

Packed lunches, self-catering?

Because eating out in a restaurant with a screaming baby or a toddler doing BLW is a waste of time and money.

See my post of 19:13 for further info

Why do you sit in a restaurant with a screaming baby?

Well clearly the issue does not apply to you. Clearly you’re not going to sit with a screaming baby in a restaurant either!

Unfortunately no, they are not.

People do sit in restaurants with a screaming baby. They do leave food all over the floor and they do let them run around.

I have no idea why they do it to their own children (screaming baby is clearly not happy and with the other issues, their children are risking injury).

That’s before you consider the other diners and staff.

Great post soapbox

I also find it a bit offensive that the children with blaring IPads in restaurants are being assumed to have a disability. My child with asd has never used an IPad in a restaurant as it wasn't a habit I wanted to start. Sure he probably would sit still and I could eat my meal without having to bother to entertain/speak to him but I didn't think it would do much for his social skills. So my kids disability is a big reason why we don't have iPads at the table.

Exactly pp

Families actually functioned abs socialised before the IPad