Is there a similar forum to MN for men? And if not, why not?

[Multidimensionalbeing]

Because I think there should be.

I don't hate men though it will probably be suggested. I really don't. And I think the forum should be open to anyone who wants to use it for advice.

But....It's becoming increasingly strange around here. We've always had the 'what about the menz?' posters derailing threads talking about the harrassment or abuse of women by pointing out that women do it too..... Though it seems worse recently.

But now it seems that so many threads descend into accusations that men are treated differently on MN and often they are. But surely that's because it has a predominantly female membership? Who will see things from the female perspective?

It seems to me that it's causing division and bun-fighting among posters when I genuinely don't understand why there isn't a similar forum available for men?

Why not?

Why does a man join a predominantly female forum to then point out that they're not being treated like a woman? Or....just sit and watch as the women do it for them?

If there is no where else for them on-line then why not?

I'm sure it's possible.

Multi,

What do you have to do to make it ‘accessible’ to men? We can generally read in the same way as women...

I guess there are some boards that aren't related to parenting though, and mumsnet is very well known and popular, so maybe that is why women with no kids come here. (for advice and tips.)

Still don't know why men come here though. And from what I have read on this thread so far, quite a number of posters think the same.

EG, @trueheart1

Krytensnanobots Why can't men have their own space for parenting advice instead of going to a predominantly female space?

EXACTLY. Like men don't dominate enough in this world, without muscling in on mumsnet!

As I said though, it's just my opinion that I didn't understand why men come here, I wasn't saying 'why don't they all bore off!'

And of course everyone is welcome, as long as they aren't coming here purposely to bash mothers and women (and I have seen THAT happening!) People from MRA come on here fairly often. Now THEY can bore off!

Larygryll; Wow for illustrating the point perfectly. Thanks for explaining the group to us so that we know how awful and "chipy" so many of us are.

I do think there is a correlation between male posters who announce their maleness in their usernames, and how irritating they are.

What would a male counterpart to the Feminist forum be?

I think people are really going to have to learn to accept the fact that there is no safe space on the internet. You cannot just cordon off an area and say “women only” and expect it to be respected. It won’t be. People will always intrude. You have to accept this. You have to learn to deal with it. These people exist in real life and you have to learn to handle it. Use the intrusion of the unwelcome visitors on MN to practise how to deal with them IRL. They aren’t going anywhere.

Could you be any more condescending and patronising @NoCryLilSoftSoft ?

True,

You only need to look at the number of threads with titles like ‘what’s happened to MN’ to realise that it is not only males who think it has become chippy of late.

People start questioning threads to get attacked and shot down. Not a male/female thing.

A polite acknowledgement of the fact that abuse happens to men too and then a return to the original discussion would deal with the problem.
It is a choice to engage with any of the members on here. If someone is behaving in a provocative or disruptive way deal with it the way that emergency services deal with provocative members of the public. Warn. Keep safe. Ignore. Ignore. Ignore. If necessary, engage once calm has returned. Although often without the desired responses the poster will have left the thread.

I think a few men on a thread balances the conversation a bit, some threads on here are very man-hatey and I don't think it's fair not to let men defend themselves when they are being spoken about. That's a very cowardly system where you can rest assured that the men can't argue their own case when you slag them off.

So many people are apparently "gender fluid" now that the men can just identify as women or mums and get on a female only forum anyway.

If I dealt with unwanted male intrusion on MN the same way I do IRL, I'd be banned.

dionne

* I do find it odd that men come here, or women who aren't mums. It is MUMSNET after all!*

Erm, you do know there is a conception and an infertility section? For women who want to become mums but aren't yet already (and in the case of the infertility section, those of us who want to become mums but can't)

Are they just for women who are TTC a sibling?

Should we all piss off to another infertility forum? Or should we just stay on the infertility boards and not venture out onto any other sections?

If you want a female only forum feel free to start one. However this is a parenting website for either sex. Saying it's mainly for women so men should stay away is the same shitty argument men use in other areas of life. 2 wrongs don't make a right.

It's not just for parents, either. When I signed up, I quite truthfully stated that I had no children; still let me on . I like it on here. In the main ......

If they created their own forums there wouldn't be this problem

I think this is where you're mistaken. The men who come here to argue with women would still be here, even if there was an identical and equally busy forum for men. They would still choose to come here. That's the nature of online trolls.

If men created their own forums, you'd lose most of the normal/decent men here who are here just to talk, and you'd keep all the trolls who are here to argue.

might go and join Italian singles chat. I’m not Italian, nor have I ever been there, oh I’m not single either but why not!?
People are Bonkers!
Don't know what you're on about... this forums is not only for mums, simple as! Have a chat with MNHQ if this doesn't suit your needs

Should we all piss off to another infertility forum? Or should we just stay on the infertility boards and not venture out onto any other sections?
TBH fertilityfriends.co.uk is much better, been there for years, you won't find same advice/expertise in here ...

I do find it odd that men come here, or women who aren't mums. It is MUMSNET after all!

Really? Why's that? If MN were solely limited to mothers, then it's possible that the ONLY thing some would have in common is ..... the fact that they have children. Not really sufficient to foster meaningful, sustainable relationships.

I find that I have plenty in common with plenty of members here, regardless of whether they have children. I like it here and I'd like to stay; unless of course you can point me to another suitable site for the childless

I think having a male presence helps bring a little balance and sanity back to threads. Women on their own can be a bit of a challenge.
I don't think it's coincidence that MN is the most female dominated board I've ever used and it's also the most phobic of anything that isn't female/for women...and gets away with it on the grounds that this is 'for the womenz'.
It's good for any forum to have a cross section of individuals. I'm female, but I'm not a mum and have absolutely no intention of ever being a mum - I came to mumsnet for the chat and AIBU sub-boards.

Yes, mn should absolutely start a board to counter feminism. It will be called "the patriarchy's fine, no really" or something equally snappy, and we'll all enjoy having our eyes opened in a scintillating debate.

Won't that be fun.

Women on their own can be a bit of a challenge.

Really?

As Anecdoche says, men dominate the majority of the internet. So no, they don't need their own special space

In any case, anyone can be anyone online. Sometimes it's staggeringly obvious that it's a man posting, more often unless a poster tells us we have no idea (and even then we cannot verify it). So until there are labia scanners to gain access to certain websites, we have to accept that anyone can post on an open forum (provided that they stay within talk guidelines)

Diego - true. But at least there'd be a forum to direct them to. Whereas currently it seems this is the only forum where they can post.

Even though Dadsnet and the like has been set up with them in mind. I'll join Dadsnet later and obviously no-one will say anything as it's 'a parenting forum' so I'm obviously the target demographic for Dadsnet and nothing to be said by me joining as a woman.

I also agree with your sentiment OP. It does make me chuckle though when a bloke rocks up, a lot of women on here go all coy :)) and excuse all manner of shite.

I personally don't want to interact with the men coz Im a mum not a dad.

I’m beginning to wonder why I bother coming here but then I read an insane AIBU thread and I get sucked back in

I was reading a thread in Relationships about DV against a male and some of the responses were disgusting, nobody says that there must be another side to the story if a woman is assaulted by a man so why do some posters think it is appropriate to do so when it’s violence against males?