to ask why so many people didn't stop to help?

[willothewisp17]

long story cut short - l was out last night at the threate with my sil and mil, once play had finished we went to wetherspoons, sil got taxi because her feet were sore and me and mil walked.

found a man passed out on the ground (it was cold and raining) made sure he had a pulse and tried to rouse him, he woke up a bit and it was soon discovered he was drunk, his friends had all left him, didn't want an ambulance or the police called because he's known with the police and then passed out again. felt his pockets for a phone to see if we could get someone but he had nothing so we phoned the local police station and they came and helped him up and took him home.

what gets me is in the time when we were phoning the police station (we had moved away from him to do this so he didn't hear and get angry/stressed) so many people walked past him and didn't even bother to stop and see that he was okay! not even a glance! is this normal? I don't think it matters that he was drunk and his own fault he was in that state, he still needed help, we couldn't leave him there in the rain!

London. I have 2 differing stories:

1. People on tubes & trains refusing to acknowledge the "baby on board" badge (FYI peeps ignore heavily pregs wimen on buses & let them stand too) - i was round 6/7 weeks preg in Jan 2014, just b4 Feb 2014 floods & tube strikes & mc at 7 weeks; likely due to combo of factors (long commute, a bad fall i had, etc.)
2. During said bad fall (on a busy main road near Fulham Broadway), approx. Nov 2013, when I didn't know I was pregs yet - multiple (multiple) lovely people stopped to help me, offer to help me up etc. The nicest one was a guy - he actually looked back to check i was ok & standing back up. It was clear fall had knocked me for six - probably wiv good reason.

Conclusion - people can be lovely, but public transport is a Dog eat Dog world!!

Apologies if someone has said this already. I'm guilty of skimming.

It's called the bystander effect. Social animals constantly look for cues from others as to how to behave. It's such a powerful inhibition it can overrule all reason.

Shockingly, the majority of people will ignore obvious abuse, violence, need or even murder if they see no-one else is reacting.

That's not to see it can't be overruled. But it is instinctual and frighteningly commonplace. You are the exception and that's a good thing!

Yep, agree it is the bystander effect. Theres been various different experiments on it. I would have stopped too op. Probably because I know the majority dont tend to.

I'm in London and unfortunately I see so many people flat out on a Friday or Saturday night lying in the street or a door way .You can't help everyone who you see slumped out in a alley way as you would be constantly on the phone to the police.

I am glad you stopped OP and think you were both courageous and kind.

Someone stopped for my husband when he was found at the side of the road with a head-injury (from a hit and run) - though he was vomiting and trying to fight and it was night-time.

That person saved his life. It was a close thing. He was in hospital for many months but this year (more than 15 years afterwards) he walked his daughter down the aisle.

I still think about that good and courageous but unknown woman who got help for him in the vital moments.

Not unreasonable. You showed compassion. I've read through some of the comments and there are alot of people surmising over the chap. Okay, he may have made the choice to drink, but since we know nothing of his back ground then we should not pass judgement. What you did was right and you demonstrated love towards your fellow human being who could have passed away on the street. As for the people walking passed; this happens and anyway you wouldn't want to many cooks to spoil the broth as you bith were helping him. Well done, make sure you are safe in any first aid situation. 🌸

I've called an ambulance for a man lying on the floor. I was alone at night so I didn't approach him and the emergency services said to absolutely not approach him, not to put myself in danger and that they were on their way to assist... Just my two pennies worth

I have stopped in the passed. I have also sat in my car an phoned an ambulance because I didn't feel safe. Wouldn't just leave anyone there. My uncle died because no one would help. He appeared drunk but he wasn't. He had a stroke.

I'd always stop and help. I'd intervene if I saw someone being attacked too. When I was 8 months pregnant with my son I saw a man chase a young lad (maybe 10 yrs old) into an empty building. I ran in after them, man was pummelling child, i grabbed him, he punched me square in the face, realised I was pregnant and ran away.

Maybe now I would call the Police if pregnant or with my kids, but I acted on instinct at the time and there were no mobile phones back then.