No no no no no

[WoofWoofMooWoof]

I'll start this off:

The mom outside school today who said to her 3-year old: "Move it! Fuckin' hell, why are you so slow!"

Skinny jeans on men.

People who answer "yes i'm fine" or just "yes" when someone says "how are you". Just leave out the YES, it's not grammatically correct. Just say "I'm fine thanks" or something similar, no need for the "yes".

It's a relatively new thing, nobody used to say it, i watch loads of old films and i make a point of noticing if anyone says it....they don't.

'Wifey to Danny, Mama to Ava-Mae, Fur-Mama to Bentley'

Please tell me you made Fur-Mama up. Please.

Cyclists who have a child on the back in a child seat but don't wear a helmet. They usually (not always ) have the child in a helmet, but if there's an accident the child needs the parent to be conscious and with them. I'm not a cyclist so I don't understand the pros and cons here fully, but why would a cyclist not wear a helmet anyway?

'The proof is in the pudding'.

This one does my fucking head in. Doesn't the fact that it makes no sense whatsoever give them a clue that it's WRONG.

I can handle brufen, as that’s a real name for it, but the other variations irk me.

Charmedrose, I think people are starting to reply with ‘yes’ because so many people say ‘You alright?’ or ‘How’s you, you doing fine?’ rather than ‘how’re you?’

Cyclists riding two abreast so they can chat on busy London roads. I. Can’t. Get. Past. You.

People trying to get on the tube or train without letting me off first.

People saying ‘If I was’. It’s ‘If I were’.

‘Excited to’, ‘gotten’, ‘can I get?’, ‘a scissor’ & all other Americanisms.

My FB friend who calls her kids Mr 5 & Ms 2.5.

Judge Judy shouting ‘baloney!’ and Judge Rinder shouting ‘talking!’ So rude!

Turnt. As in “I turnt round and said....”. Was the person behind you? Grrrr
Spag bowl
Chinese on route
Plumped up lips and faces in the under ‘30’s
( I’m looking at you daughter)
Hair extensions that are badly fitted ( I can do it cheap for you Hun)!
The cunts who visit next door and block my driveway because they can’t be arsed to drive two foot to a parking space. Then act offended when asked not to.

.

Mabey. As in ‘mabey they had second thoughts’.

The word is maybe.

My silly mil pronounces bedroom as baidroom ... Baid as in maid. Wtf silly cow!

One of my old teachers at school pronounced it “Eye-BOOB-afen instead of Ibuprofen.

And I hate “Me-graine” it’s “MY-graine”

Brufen is a brand name or was as far as I can see

I also hate interviewees on radio or TV who begin their reply with “so....” so has nothing to do with it. None of these peccadillos beat your opening post though OP which is really sad. Swearing at a small child is never acceptable.

Please tell me you made Fur-Mama up. Please

It goes with furbaby, furchildren, furdaughter etc. All unfortunately real.

Can't bear them, or 'rainbow bridge'. Nauseating.

"Your" instead of "you're" or "you are"
"Must of" instead of "must have"
Starting someone's name with a lower case letter when writing/typing
Thinking it's cool to swear in front of children
Using the word "like" in every sentence

The word 'panties'

Omg yes. 🤢🤢🤢

Yikes, the post count was up to 666. I thought I had better move it on with a pointless post!

Shop bought ripped jeans.
You want to wear ripped jeans?
You buy them and wear them until they start fray by themselves. Then continue wearing them.

People that say the 'g' in 'tagliatelle ' and in 'bolognese'!! (parents in law, I'm looking at you!)...

Haven't read whole thread so this might already be on here...

People who say pronounciation instead of pronunciation

I forgot to mention:

Strictly Come Dancing.
The X Factor.

Both leave me utterly cold.

Bicnod I always used to say mischIEvious instead of mischevous.

Only found out the error of my ways last year

“Plating up” as an expression and a concept.

NO.

I hate all this new "pricepoint" nonsense. E.g. "let's sit and have a xhat and think about the pricepoint"
Aka price JUST price.

Parents with pushchairs who get on the exit doors of buses before letting people off first. There is one stop where I regularly get off that this happens at every bloody time. I'm disabled,and can't stand on a moving bus,so I have to wait until the bus has stopped before leaving my seat,causing a delay of what,about 3 seconds before I get to the exit door. Then I find it blocked by someone with a pushchair,then I end up getting the door shut in my face because I didn't get off quickly enough!

Not sure how to write this...
Family member re. holiday arrangements always says "breakfusses are included". Always called M&S "Markses" and basiscally pluralises any word she is able to.......