No no no no no

[WoofWoofMooWoof]

I'll start this off:

The mom outside school today who said to her 3-year old: "Move it! Fuckin' hell, why are you so slow!"

Skinny jeans on men.

Film trailers saying the date as 'October Four' instead of fourth, for example.

People who use 'defiantly' when they mean 'definitely'

Gender reveal parties/cakes/nightmares.

Sorry one more - people (mostly women) who only describe themselves by their relationships to others.
'Wifey to Danny, Mama to Ava-Mae, Fur-Mama to Bentley'

GAAAAAH

DH says 'take down your panties' in a Swedish accent. He thinks it's funny.

(it is a little bit)

Facebook

Pete wicks

Self diagnosed food intolerances oh bore off you attention seeker.

People who jog with a pram with headphones in I fucking hate that.

Ath leisure wear

Self absorbed twathammers who pedal along on bikes with their tiny DC in those wanky trailers on busy roads.

Because that stupid fucking flag is going to announce to the driver of the 15ft tall articulated truck up your arse that your toddler is being dragged along behind you two feet off the ground and the arrangement is in no way a catastrophe waiting to happen but that's OK as long as you're announcing your fucking eco warrior credentials to the world.

Pricks.

The idiot woman/man (both of them do it) and then ride down the road with a dog on each side of their bike to exercise the dogs when people are trying to drive to work. They ride out almost in the middle of the lane and it's impossible to over take them.

People who take their mobile phones into the toilet with them. Gross

People who sit at the outside of the seat on the train/bus/whatever and refuse to budge in so you have to squeeze past them with all your stuff to get a seat and then do the exact same thing to get back off at your stop, while all the time risking falling over as the train jolts to a stop/speeds ups.

Haha Woof! Hope you get to throw your crotch away soon. Careful where you put it in the meantime though, you don’t want anyone tripping over your crotch ;)

Ophelia I do agree that from an HSE perspective they are a disaster waiting to happen

I cycle but I go off grid and off the main roads as much as I can

I see these people in arterial main roads

Anyone who describes something as being 'cliche'. NO NO NO. It can be A cliche, or cliched - it CANNOT be merely 'cliche'.

See also:

'I did it off my own back'.

'He was chomping at the bit'.

'The proof is in the pudding'.

ARRGGHH

People who say "opposed to" when they mean "as opposed to"

People who use "text" as if it is past tense. "I text her and she said...". No, you didn't. You TEXTED her and it's irrelevant anyway because you are no longer my friend due to your blatant inability to conjugate a fucking verb correctly.

I rest, I rested, I had a rest.
I text, I texted, I sent a text.

How hard is it FFS?

Rant over. I need a rest...

High denier tights worn as leggings. Don't they realise that leggings don't actually have feet on them?

Hashtags #lovinglife #mum #ilovemykids etc

And women who wear see-through white trousers with no knickers underneath.

BeyondNoone - my late DM used to pronounce 'ibuprofen' as 'I-boo-proofen',with the accent on the 'boo' part. I put the accent on the 'pro' bit.

Shop assistants calling me Madame makes me cringe.

Is text strictly a verb anyway?

*GranolaLover

BeyondNoone - my late DM used to pronounce 'ibuprofen' as 'I-boo-proofen',with the accent on the 'boo' part. I put the accent on the 'pro' bit.*

Yes to that, but I'd like to add I-buro-fen instead of I-bu-profen

I hear it A LOT - is it a brand name I don't know about maybe?

Exh just calls it brufen. Does my head in

People who walk round the swimming pool in groups / women who wear full perfume makeup in the pool then moan if they get hair wet! It’s a swimming pool take the sodding makeup and crappy Yardley shite off!
Entitled arseholes who park do whatever they want and generally have no shame whatsoever
The whole contouring /tattooed eyebrow or drawn on caterpillar thing since when did women become so insecure 😟 as to have to put makeup on so thick

Like PPs the myself yourself thing instead of you and me.

Similarly the epidemic of ‘ways’. We seem to no longer have houses with halls, drives, doors and arches but they’re “hallways, driveways, doorways and archways”. Also the death of the ground, even the real police on TV seem to “wrestle him to the floor” when they’re on a bloody motorway so surely it’s the ground.

Finally, the death of the word ‘which’ which seems to be replaced invariably by ‘that’.

Of course the people who don’t pick up dog
poo, who spit in the street or swear loudly and aggressively in public are all beyond the pale.

Pavement cyclists - it's illegal - fuck off.

People who say "Haitch"