DH wanting to go hiking on family weekend away.

[PooFlower]

We are off to the Lake district for a Fri to Mon weekend away with our two dc.
DH has announced he plans to go for a short hike (2 hours) on the Sat and a long walk (5-6 hours) on the Sunday. He says he will get up at first light and go so he is back in time to do other things.
Am I being unreasonable to ask him not to?
I dont mind him going for a short walk each morning however a long walk will ruin the weekend for me. He will go to bed early the night before, probably wake dd2 up if he gets up early and be shattered and fit for nothing when he gets back.
I feel mean though. He loves hiking but hardly gets to go these days. I wouldn't mind so much if we were away for a week but think it will impact the holiday too much as with it only being a short break.

That’s right waterrat they aren’t babies. 13 yr old has not that many family holidays left to go.
I don’t think OP is complaining about the physical logistics of looking after her DCs - although it’s hard to think of activities that 13 and 5 would enjoy together- I believe the OPs issue is that she expected a family weekend away , instead of being left for most of it alone with the DCs whilst DH goes off and does his own thing.

The DH should be the one finding family walks as he likes walking so much- not the OP.

If he’s planning a 6hr walk in the Lakes in December it’s going to be more or less sun up to sun down, thats taking a whole day out of your 3 day trip which I think is taking p!$$ a wee bit...

Posters suggesting you go along and take a 13yr old and a 5yr old - please don’t ! The fells in winter with limited daylight hours are a dangerous place, especially so for younger children (who feel the cold quicker) and inexperienced walkers.... the weather changes in a blink of any eye!

I know I don’t know you or how experienced you all are but I get the feeling you’re not that experienced?

Please don’t take this as patronising or the wrong way because I mean it with sincerity - but as someone who both lives and walks in the Lakes the idea of you all out on the fells for 6hrs is December makes me nervous 😟

My suggestion would be a walk as a family for a day and maybe stick to perimeter routes around Lakes - Derwentwater is 9 miles but if the kids get fed up you can hop on the boat back!

And let him go do a longer Fell walk on the last day while you’re packing - if your family is anything like mine he’ll only get under your feet anyway 😊

Hope you have a fabulous holiday - I adore the part of the world I’m lucky enough to live in 😍

Also check out this page - they have loads of ideas for family friendly walks!!

www.facebook.com/familywalkspubslakedistrict/

To be fair pp2017, it was 13 degrees last Christmas. Hardly the Arctic!

(shuts up because I have, and have always had, a preternatural ability to not feel the cold that's not really relevant to normal human beings)

Well last Christmas was bloody warmer than summer.

But yeah, obviously don't take the bloody 5 year old on a long walk if they're not used to it and don't let him leave you to do the kid wangling solo whilst he monopolises the majority of the daylight hours.

Your DH could do his longer hike on one of the days and the whole family can do a shorter hike on the second morning. Then he’ll owe you some time away on your own to look at an art gallery maybe? You could also do something girly with your older DD, she’d probably like that.

Lunch/cream tea in a tea room after the walk would be lovely too.

But it does sound as though your DH needs to think more about what will work for the family not just for him.

It won’t have been 13degrees up a Fell though 😬

It’s not just the temperature its the wind chill, if the rain comes in and you get wet your body temp drops (children’s drop quicker), low cloud/rain coming in fast and restricting visibility... you only have to follow any of the MRTs on social media to see how easily conditions can change and catch out even the most experienced and prepared walkers.

Now I sound like a right party pooper preacher 😆😆😆

I don’t mean to be, it’s just sometimes people massively underestimate the fells and I’m not in any way suggesting OP is but if I didn’t speak up and then read on 28 December about a family being rescued I’d have been mortified...

Oooh this You could also do something girly with your older DD, she’d probably like that.** There are loads of lovely places that do half spa days and that time of year they’ll have offers!

😍

Are you going over Christmas or New Year OP? Seeing as they're on a Sunday, is he going to leave you Christmas Day or NYD for his walk?

To others saying there's nothing to do in the Lakes apart from walk, you're all very wrong. There is absolutely tons of activities including Grizedale Forest, Lake Cruises, Go Ape, National Trust properties and even a zoo.

This doesn't sound like a family holiday. It sounds like he wants a holiday and you lot are tagging along. If you and your DC aren't really into walking much, just pick somewhere else.

The Lake District is fabulous, but its a long way to go for a bit of a trundle, followed by DVDs and hot chocolate. It may not be the nicest place to walk in the middle of Winter either. The weather can be harsh up there.

He can get off to an early start doing an easy section of route as it gets light to maximise the daylight if he chooses his route wisely.

The shorter family walk and solo long walk sounds fair to me. DH has done several hikes while I've been too pregnant or looking after very young children* to participate (now they're getting bigger we're gradually training them up to walk themselves) While the likes of the Catbells are a great introduction to hiking for 5 year olds, December isn't the greatest timing for it.

It's rather teasing for a keen walker to go somewhere like the Lake District and just pootle around on a gentle walk that could be done anywhere.

It's a bit late now that it's been booked, but it's not the ideal location and timing for happy compromises for such a different group of interests.

• I've had plenty of other weekends away or time out running on holiday so it's balanced up in the end, and I didn't want him missing out when my body wasn't cooperating.

handbagkrabby that's EXACTLY what I was thinking. The seasoned hikers saying 'get them up the mountain right away' are, in my opinion, really quite silly, no, stupid, and reckless. It's VERY poor advice indeed.

These are huge landscapes topping 3,000 ft and no one should enter into walking around them without building up to it and having the right equipment.

DH usually starts his walks in the dark with proper head torch so that he gets the trickier parts and the decent (which is the most dangerous bit usually) in daylight. He is well experienced and has all the proper kit. There is a hill at the north end of the Lakes which you can drive most if the way up and weather permitting would be ideal for a family walk while still getting brilliant views over Keswick etc.

Latrigg.

The Lake District is only a long way for a bit of a trundle if you live a long way from the Lake District

Thisceas taken either at Easter or October, can't remember anymore.

Your mistake was posting a really reasonable compromise but you fail to understand they not enjoying a 6 hour hike is against mumsnet rules.

SentimentalLentil Given that the OP is going there for a holiday, I don't think it's unreasonable to assume she doesn't live nearby? Otherwise, it wouldn't be so much of a rare treat for her husband, surely?

Not sure why you're so snarky about it, tbh.

Ive changed my opinion having read more

Go to the lake district, op wants to sit on ass and do nothing you cannot do at home. Children cant or wont join in with what people go to the lake district for.

If i were dh id go alone and leave you behind.

There's something very rigid and peculiar about this idea that there's no point in visiting an area of outstanding natural beauty if you don't want to spend all of the daylight hours marching about at altitude. You do realise that the chances of op getting to look at a view (esp in December) will be greatly increased if she's below the cloud line?

It also seems unlikely from what she's said that she would be able to look at mountains, wander in beautiful countryside, cruise on a lake or potter around Keswick if she stayed at home. Why are these ways of being on holiday less legitimate than hiking?

Pandora I've reported that unkind comment.

I'm astounded at how many people are calling a two hour walk short! I am not a walker (really can't understand the point of just walking for the sake of walking) and wouldn't walk for that time for any reason.

I think he is unreasonable Ashe clearly is just going to dump the kids on you and do what he wants which is very selfish.

I'd go with him doing the short walk only and spending the rest of the time with you, but going out somewhere not just sitting watching a DVD which seems a waste of a trip away.

Surely there are some outdoor attractions or a nice museum you could go to?

It is true that December / January on the high fells is not the best first walk for a 5 year old.

Op, I hope some of the compromise suggestions on this thread might help, whether the timing of his walk or the way you work family activities alongside each other.

Really Sisinisawa?

Are you new to MN then? As that comment was mild compared to what is truly considered as unkind round here.