... A bit upset to be referred to, by a 3rd party, as 'huge'?

[IamtheDevilsAvocado]

Just this....

Someone referred to me as this... You'll recognise her.. She's the huge girl...

Apart from rudeness... At what size does someone become 'huge'.. I appreciate it's all relative etc etx...

PS I'm an (in proportion) size 18-20 and 5 foot 8. So to me tallish and curvy...

What about the fact that your a heart attack waiting to happen? What about your organs failing and struggling because their too coveredin yellow fat to work properly? What about running around the park with your kids? It's not good to be so unhealthy.

What about the fact that another persons health is none of your fucking business. Do you go around saying rude things to smokers? People drinking? People drinking soda? People do things everyday that are bad for their health, are you being rude to them?

I get why you’re hurt by this.

I am five eight, twice I’ve went up to a sixteen, once I was walking through the office and one man eyed me up, as they walked past I heard his colleague say “ you always like the big ones” . I felt shit.

Size twenty is big at five eight, and to someone who is five foot and a sixteen you prob do look huge when she looks up at you. It is not a nice way to describe someone though, but if that’s how she sees you that’s how she sees you. She was unlikely to say “ you’ll recognise her, she’s the tallish curvy one”

I'm a size 18/20 too op and smaller than you at 5ft 5 and I do carry my weight well ( hate that phrase but you get what I'm saying! )

I would hate to be described as huge but am under no illusion that I probably am to a lot of people. Two of mu best friends are a
size 8 so if we went out I would look like the back of a bus next to them!

I think there are nicer and kinder ways to describe someone's physique though...

I didnt realise how fat I was - huge actually - until I lost weight then everyone told me exactly how huge I was - I really didnt know - I had complete body blindness. Which sounds bizarre I know. I seriously looked in the mirror and thought I'd put on a pound or two and clothes were cut smaller

I really wish someone had given me the wake up call a few years ago. and I wouldnt have spent so long hiding away.

@user1471517900 maybe it seems patronising to you. I was trying to address the fact that people seem able to tell others they're taking up to much space in the world, which is judgemental and rude. Given a choice I'd rather be patronising but maybe I wasn't clear enough. I was suggesting she reframe it to herself not to you.

OP I would suggest if you wanted to feel better about the comment coming onto mumsnet is not the best place to do it.

I would say you're pretty big but not huge and I'm not being nasty. Cos I'm big but through exercise and some diet monitoring I've stopped eating myself into oblivion AND I'm addressing my health issues (I would certainly be almost pre-diabetic if I wasn't losing weight now).

It's a struggle and I'm certainly not banning foods - I'm changing my life building in exercise and managing my food intake better. I'm reducing portions and going to the gym. I'm still eating chocolate, eating out and having puddings but not as often and not as much.

Since June I've lost 8kgs, I could have lost more but this is steady for me and I need it to be an overall lifestyle change not a crash diet. I do look better and I feel more confident.

So OP I think it was a similar comment that made me think it's time to act. I didn't like what I saw in the mirror I did look huge in photos. I was size 18 and 5ft 4 so prob looked bigger than you.

Hope you don't feel too bad and hope you get sorted

I was a size 20 at 5' 5 this time last year and I was huge. I felt huge, looked huge. I got out of breath tying my shoe laces. I had a BMI of over 38, which is category 2 obese.

I've lost almost 50lbs, I'm a size 14 and I'm still obese (BMI 30.7). I'm still not what I would describe as "curvy" - I look and feel pretty fat.

While I would never describe someone as "huge", there's no dressing a size 20 up as "curvy" or "chubby".

Spot on Anni.
so fat shaming works does it? say to somebody that they have yellow day clogging up their heart, and hey they suddenly have the self belief and confidence to look at what they are eating.

And?

That 'and' was to whichever knob said 'it's not nice to look at'

Speak for your self Dexter.

That’s right Dexter try and make the OP feel worse than she already is.

it's not o.k to be so fat

Dexter. What it's NOT, is any of your business.

The only response to that is

"You'll recognise her... She's the rude girl...".

Her description was unpleasant, unnecessary and untrue and she has no business commenting on your size (and I'd say the same if you were short or skinny).

It was an adult.... Ironically this person is at least a 16 and about 5foot tall...

I’m 5 ft 2. To me, 5 ft 8 is huge. You don’t see too many women of that height where I live.

In proportion, in that I fit into a size 18-20..with big boobs/hips and a waist

In my 20s I was 16/18/20 depending on cut and shop but I was good weight - it was all boobs and hips.

Sadly that's not continued as I've aged but IME it certainly doesn't mean hugh.

I suspect it's also a reference to your height but it wasn't a nice comment at all - probably just thoughtlessness.

My youngest has been getting upset about tall comments - I've called a few people up on them and they apparently didn't realise it might be upsetting to her and few were very apologetic.

(I can't say tall is good - as both DH and I were tall children who ended up pretty average height plus have an older child at same height who's starting to be bit sensitive about their lack of height currently. )

So don’t look dexter. Stay home and Gaze on your own perfection all day. I don’t think the world will miss out on much

YANBU OP

That's just rude and there's no need for it.

I wouldn’t call someone huge because it’s hurtful and lazy way to describe someone but if they were obese, I would be thinking it.

I wouldn’t be happy for someone to draw attention to something that most people would be sensitive to. Then again, when I had a BMI of 16 I was called ‘too skinny’, which at the time mystified me because that’s not how I saw myself but now I have a healthier BMI, I would probably agree.

Was it rude to say, unequivocally yes but it doesn’t change the fact that most people think it.

Dexter - are you always this charming?

Not as gross as your attitude though eh Dexter. Do you not think obese people don’t realise the impact their weight has on their health?