Phrases/words you can't stand on MN

[cathf]

Maybe it's just me, but I'll kick off with:
Booby monster (or any kind of 'monster')
Figetbum (not seen this often, but it is so horrific I can't forget it)
Snuggly cuddles (see also milky cuddles,and sleepy cuddles or snuggles)
Newborn, used as a noun, not an adjective - as in my newborn, not my newborn baby.
I'm sure I will think of some more!

I have only really seen it with the waist measurements when they are looking for trousers for tall teenagers Pengggwn. it's sort of a requirement for that.

"You don't have a MIL/SIL/FIL problem. You have avDH problem."

"Get your ducks in a row".

"Non" at the end of condescending questions, when the rest is written in English.

"(Insert name) has it". The poster agrees with a previous poster and therefore a conclusion is drawn and everyone else can piss off with their opinion.

Disturbingly (until I read back through previous page) I thought you meant that people where posting their sons vital statistics ahem below the waistline. That really would be creepy.

A bright child will do well at any school.

Yes, the 'you knew what you were getting in to' wrt step-parenting.
I'm a step parent. My SD was 5 when I met her dad. I had never been in a relationship with a man with a child & I don't have children myself so no, I didn't know what I was getting into. I make it up as I go along, same as all the most people I reckon.

And! (While I'm on a roll), YES! The 'I'd have told your MIL to fuck off / gone NC / divorced my husband' responses when anyone posts about a mildly irksome but not completely awful MIL problem.
Or any problem really.
I can't really believe that the people who always say that they would have these incredibly robust responses would actually say that. Or if they do, they can't possibly have any friends or family left talking to them.

Triggery/triggering /it really triggered me.
This used to be used on eating disorders forums both way back when I was on them 20ish years ago. Now the majority of the population seems to be triggered by things.

You won't get any sympathy from the toddler mums, gorygloria. They just hang about the teens board to advise teen mums how they should have done things differently. The toddler mums know, of course, their child will not cause any problems because they have made it clear that they will not tolerate such behavior. Anyway, their toddler knows this and they are ONLY TWO

{{{waves frantically at the OP}}}}

{{settles in and pours a glass of wine}}}}
{{{hands glass of wine to the OP}}}}

But this one really grates on me

{{{{shrugs}}}}

Just realised the correct symbol was

cathf now you are REALLY getting me sold on the teens board!

I use the brackets.

Something that I've been wondering for ages. YY = Yes, yes, no?

Give your head a wobble lol tee hee hun fuck off.

Literally every other thing posted.

Sanpro, sanpro, sanpro... Don't know why it is annoying but it is.

Also feeling the need to use D before everything, DH DD etc, fine, because that is an accepted acronym here.

But I remember a thread where someone used DDog, and in fact the dog was anything but dear / darling to them... ! They were giving out about the dog. So why call it dear / darling whatever, in that case.

If you pull someone with a 4-year-old old PFB up on their sanctimonious "my child would never , you get told "but I was a teen once". No shit, how original, I was born aged 35!

Mission,

A MNer on another thread informed us all that "YY" = "Too wise".

I suspect she may have been taking the piss.

Most of the words/phrases selected for this thread come across as very childish and jar with the perception of the site being peopled by intelligent, professionals which is possibly why they irritate so much.

A few things that drive me mad:

Naice
Vair
Boob/Boobage/Boob to sleep/On the Boob
Large of Nork
Veggies

You/your (whoever) is in FOG, that's Fear, Obligation, Guilt. I'm pretty sure the people who trot this out are not qualified to do so and have either just read it on here previously or on the internet somewhere and want to be the first to post it thinking it makes them sound clever.

Agree with the poster about the competitive "What are you having for dinner" threads, it's always loads of veggies or a massive salad, I bet they are actually having chicken nuggets, chips and beans.

The virtual buffets/parties. When I first joined MN several years ago there were threads upon threads full of:

"Waves to X", "Plonks large arse next to X on the bench and hands round chocolate digestives" "Starts mixing G&T's for everyone."

This would go on for pages whilst the OP and whatever the subject of the thread was were completely ignored.

Thankfully, it doesn't happen very often now.

Oh yes, the virtual buffet parties. I used to feel I had to knock first but was usually ignored.

"stinky" and "pits"

People who write 'cancel the cheque'.

"Literally crying here, well done you bullies" if the thread comes back with a unanimous YABU or some other result OP didn't want. It's such a childishly obvious attempt at manipulation.