Phrases/words you can't stand on MN

[cathf]

Maybe it's just me, but I'll kick off with:
Booby monster (or any kind of 'monster')
Figetbum (not seen this often, but it is so horrific I can't forget it)
Snuggly cuddles (see also milky cuddles,and sleepy cuddles or snuggles)
Newborn, used as a noun, not an adjective - as in my newborn, not my newborn baby.
I'm sure I will think of some more!

Red Herring - people are constantly proclaiming part of a story to be a red herring on Mumsnet. Never hear the phrase in real life! You've never read it in a book or heard it in conversation, seriously? It's not a 'MN phrase.'

Dame Diazepam (sorry, no idea how to bold) of course I have heard of the phrase, I simply meant I very rarely hear anyone use it, whereas I see it very frequently on Mumsnet.

Oh, and the constant veiled troll hunting.

We all know what 'interesting first post' means! You're not being subtle. Just bloody tedious.

Give your head a wobble!

Are you me?

Of course not FFS.

Posts starting with 'Dear Ladies' - you have know idea if I'm a lady or not.

Pull up your big girl pants

This is my first time posting here

NC for this as outing

Learning moment

Milky cuddles

On the boob

My little family

Mama bear

Gentle reminder

'D' anything

Odfod

Toys and snacks

Little one

Tiny human

Pull up your big girl pants Personally I love this phrase and use it in many RL conversations as it's so often apt.

For some reason mine are usually breastfeeding related.
Boob to sleep
Boobing
Milky cuddles etc
Also hate ones like DTD and BD
I just don't understand why people can't call a spade a spade.
Things like hollibobs and famalam are other ones I can't stand and I'm sure there is loads more.

'hard of thinking' No. I just don't agree with you.

'Underthinking'. Nope-you are just making a huge deal out of absolutely nothing.

Oh and 'mundane'. Used in the Sex Topic for anyone not embracing bumsex/swinging etc.

Fidgetbum may have been around for years, but that does not make it any less annoying!
I think it's the veneer of cuteness used to mask the fact the child is not perfect (now that we live in a world where everything has to be perfect and every mother has to be the perfect mother - no frustration allowed!).
So: I am co-sleeping and I only get an hour's sleep because my DS is a fidgetbum - meaning I am exhaused and hate sleeping with my toddler.
I have a velcro baby means I am stuck to this baby every hour of every day and it is doing my head in.
Etc

'It works for us' Yuck

Another one!
'In this house' used with a smug explanation of what happens (allegedly) in their family.
Eg There are no faddy eaters allowed in this house, or only books are allowed for presents in this house.

The invention of a backstory by people other than the OP to demonstrate how OP is making a huge mistake in not accepting a date e.g. "You never know, he could still be living in his parents box room and working in the chip shop because he's actually writing a screenplay and saving his money so he can go to L.A. and sell his script to a major studio, and then you'll have lost out OP, but he'll find someone nicer than you anyway"

I'm always when people start AIBUs like this "AIBU to ask if you like cheese on toast?". One day, I'm going to say "yes YABU to ask, yin nosy bastard" and not answer their question. Why not use chat? It's a perfectly busy and active board.

Cocklodger

Can't stand it.

I really like some of these, cocklodger and it works for us.

The other scenario is when a poster is abused or treated badly by a random and the saintly crowd pile in with " they may have just lost their entire family in a boating accident" or "I would have given her an impromptu counselling session and keys to my car".

ODFOD

He's gaslighting/negging/love bombing you. A person can quite simply be a twat without having a title needed.

"Have you tried a sling?"

For any baby-related problem.

gorygloria

I know exactly the thread you're referring to and some of the answers were comedy

Oh yes to 'Talk to me about...' or, worse, 'Come talk to me about...'.

'It's not great', usually in pursed-lipped response to somebody saying they give their kids something to eat which may allow for a mild charge of unhealthiness to be laid against it. (Oh, and on a related topic, the recent demonisation of fruit on here, because sugar).

Again related: 'we've lost sight of what a normal weight looks like'. Often uttered by smug orthorexics. (FWIW, size 10, BMI 21 and three skinny children, so unaffected by such devastating home truths).

On the Relationships topic, "What are you getting out of this relationship now; what needs of yours are being met?." I feel bad about being irritated by it, as the poster is genuinely trying to help, but it sounds so formulaic, trotted out in response to just about everything. The "three Cs of alcoholism" is another stock phrase...sounds almost as if it's been cut and pasted.

'I'm a teacher.'

Especially when they think alerting you to their job makes their opinion on something objective.

"Triggering" used for anything more controversial or sadder than "what's for dinner".