To ask if your dad has ever bought you a present?

[moutonfou]

I saw a post online about a gift that someone's dad had bought them for an achievement.

It made me realise that my dad has never ever bought me a present. Of course my mum would buy things that purported to be from the two of them, but I doubt my dad ever actually knew what was in there.

I don't say this in a "what a mean guy, never buying me a present" way. It's not so much the lack of presents which struck me, but the fact that he probably didn't/doesn't actually know me well enough to know what I'd like, or could never be bothered to even take a wild guess. I don't think he'd be able to tell you three things I enjoy doing tbh.

Is this unusual?

Yes, really touching things for no reason now and then - a book or something from a gift shop of a place he thinks I would like.

I have an unusual name and was always jealous of kids having stuff with their names on. Last year I got a package in the post with a child's pencil case with my name on it 😂 Bless him.

Think I should go and call him now.

My father bought me a purple silk trouser suit when I was a teenager and we were on a day trip to a town without my DM for some reason. I saw it in the shop and he bought it as an early Christmas present. It was awesome.

He wasn't involved in present buying for the family after that for many years (although he was brilliant at presents for my DM) but now my DM has dementia he does the presents and cards - mostly off an Amazon list because I want to make it easy for him.

Not a huge amount by himself but he was always (genuinely) involved in the choosing of Christmas presents from him and my mum/Santa. He always made sure there were creative things in my stocking like watercolour pencils, pads of paper etc. The odd time he went away anywhere he would bring me something back. Once he bought me a little silver St Christopher medal which I still have even though I'm not religious. He also had an arrangement with his friend who ran a bookshop. Unsold books would have their covers removed and returned to the publisher (I have no idea why this was) and the actual pages of the book would remain intact for disposal, and he used to go and hunt for any he thought I would like. I had loads of books with no covers! At the time this seemed completely normal.

After I left home and moved away, every time I came back to visit he would cut some flowers from the garden and put them in a wee vase on the windowsill in my bedroom.

Ah my dad is/was brilliant. He's on his way out now god love him, no more picking flowers and he can barely hold a pen let alone draw for hours with my new coloured pencils.

My dad was/is vile, really a horrid man. Thankfully my DH is is exact opposite and I think he will be like some of the lovely dads here.
The one with the fresh flowers and fruit is just lovely, so thoughtful.

My late father used to get me awesome presents, ranging from the practical (electric drill, lawn mower) to the frivolous (perfume, lovely silk scarves from Libertys).

He worked abroad for many years, and would always bring me lovely perfume and leather goods on trips home. I still use a huge leather shoulder bag that he bought me in Italy, it's 40 years old and just gets better with age.

He even used to buy presents for my dogs!

My dad likes to buy small tat at Christmas.

It's sweet, even though it's often things I don't really want.

Chocolates every Christmas and I looked forward to them. I would sit every Christmas night with my cup of tea and eat them all myself when the kids were away playing with their toys.

I won’t get a box of chocolates from him this year, he passed away a few weeks ago x

Useful stuff like a new lunchbox, gardening gloves etc although that was mainly before I had DD... now she's the one that gets spoilt!

Yes, but my DP split up before I was born, so he had no one to do it for him. I buy all the DC's presents though. DH would probably buy something too old, too young, or that they weren't remotely interested in.

Yes, not often but especially if we were out together on our own and he saw something posh in a sale but still far too much for me! Or something related to a mutual hobby which he knows I'd never treat myself to.
He's probably better at spontaneous gifts than Christmas and birthday if we're talking about personal, meaningful gifts - now I'm an adult he just asks what I want for those and buys it for me, can't exactly complain about that though!