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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this is not an edible meal

159 replies

Lockheart · 10/09/2017 21:28

I'm studying for some critical exams. My bf very kindly offered to cook for me - pasta with pesto, lovely. Have barely eaten all day as I've been in the library, so was ravenous.

Into this 'pasta with pesto' went 2 day old peas and chips, half a pot of tahini, some raw peanuts, an unripe avocado, and finally some actual pesto.

When I saw him about to tip the chips in (I was studying at the kitchen table but by this point was watching with horror) I said "Oh no, please don't put those in" and he got quite huffy about it, because he was making me dinner and I was sitting there and criticising (I'd also pointed out that the avocado was not ripe).

The peas would have been fine had they not been hard, the chips were burnt, I don't like tahini, and whilst I can understand peanuts in a noodle dish, I would not serve them up with pesto (just my preference).

He also served it with a side salad - just not cricket Wink

I accept he was making me dinner and it was a lovely thing to do, but AIBU to think this is not good cooking? Pasta with just pesto is so simple and would have been more than fine.

This is a man who, upon being told I'd like to cook Mexican one evening (id been dreaming about fajitas all day), took the whole thing over; he insisted on buying veal mine (it was more than the beef mince, but it was reduced!), then put mushrooms, cashew nuts, and sultanas in with the meat. And then, to add insult to injury, tipped my pan of refried beans into the whole thing. I could do nothing but watch as my lovely and much dreamed of Mexican literally went down the pan Sad

I love the bloke and I appreciate that he cooks for me, but how can I get him to stop cooking like a student and actually cook me something edible? He's 33, for reference...

OP posts:
KnitterAndTwisted · 10/09/2017 22:11

Thank god for the clarification, I was genuinely starting to panic when Hula asked if he had put the chips in the boiling water.

I once lived with someone who served grilled chips. And they weren't oven chips, either.

KnitterAndTwisted · 10/09/2017 22:12

Chips in pasta is wrong.
Chunks of avocado in hot pasta is wrong.
Tahini mixed with pesto is oh so very wrong

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 10/09/2017 22:14

Fridge Roulette.
High risk of death!

Balaboosteh · 10/09/2017 22:16

I think this post is too lighthearted

Balaboosteh · 10/09/2017 22:17

Pasta, tinned clams and rubbery cubes of Edam cheese. In case you're interested

Silverthorn · 10/09/2017 22:18

'Making a potion' snigger.
But seriously, day old chips? Wtaf? Even without putting them in pasta pesto! Mind is boggled.
Cooking lessons for Christmas or Birthday, whichever is sooner methinks.
Maybe try writing to your fave celeb chef for an intervention.

YetAnotherNC2017 · 10/09/2017 22:20

He cannot cook for shit.

Make him watch a few Kay's Good Cooking videos on YouTube. They'll be best mates in no time.

Aquamarine1029 · 10/09/2017 22:21

OMG that sounds vile. The poor, sweet, dumb boy needs cooking lessons. The sooner the better, before he kills you!

pictish · 10/09/2017 22:23

Why on earth do you keep leftover chips in the fridge in the first place? Uneaten chips go in the bin surely?

paranoidpammywhammy2 · 10/09/2017 22:23

Lost my post!

As a student I experienced left over chip omelette with mushy peas, leftover cheesy chip soup with oxo cube and leftover chip potato salad with kebab meat.

I decided to quit the shared house/shared cooking and return to halls.

YouTheCat · 10/09/2017 22:24

For his next birthday, sign him up for a cookery class. I'd suspect a cookery teacher might be less diplomatic about his awful concoctions.

Lockheart · 10/09/2017 22:25

I dont, pictish - this is his house and his fridge! If we were at my house they would be in the compost.

OP posts:
Elllicam · 10/09/2017 22:30

Oh my god chip pasta sounds godawful. I thought my husband was bad with baked bean pasta Confused but chip pasta sounds worse.

NoSquirrels · 10/09/2017 22:32

There's a Hugh F-W book on leftovers that's genuinely good - get him that.

This thread is so funny, though! I have been Grin at lots of posts.

My DH is a bit like this too. He gets so far in cooking something that seems delicious, then he'll go 2 steps too far in the imagination stakes. We've endured the balsamic vinegar phase, for instance, which started off well but quickly became upsetting, and the tinned beans in everything phase (protein!), and the just-a-dash-of-ketchup phase, and the worst was the mint sauce in the bolognese.

He makes himself cheese on toast mostly, and is allowed to be in charge of eggs, and steak & chips.

abbey44 · 10/09/2017 22:32

Oh my God, that sounds like something a child would throw together. WTF is wrong with his tastebuds? Does he have any? Confused

UterusUterusGhali · 10/09/2017 22:36

How can anybody be that clueless?
My 9yo can cook better than that.

Maybe Jamie O's "ministry of food" might be better for him. Start with the basics.

Ye gads.

BruceAndNosh · 10/09/2017 22:39

Putting random items in a pan together does not constitute cooking

wotabastard · 10/09/2017 22:42

Are you going to show him this thread op? Please do, I think it could be the start of his recovery from his cookery disorder. Grin

BlondieNikC · 10/09/2017 22:44

Oh my life! As someone with quite major food issues (as in textures, food not touching other food etc not an ED) I found that description totally traumatising!

pictish · 10/09/2017 22:47

Oh thank god. So keeping chips isn't like a couple thing you do together.
You will have to tell him no. Put the chips in the bin and stop being weird.

ThinkOfTheSwingers · 10/09/2017 22:52

This made me laugh so loud I woke up my child! GrinGrinGrin

What the fuckity fuck!?

A) who leaves chips?
B) who keeps chips in the fridge for another day?
C) are you too involved to LTB?

Fucking chip pasta GrinGrinGrin

inchyrablue · 10/09/2017 22:52

The Sam Stern student cook books are really helpful.

ThinkOfTheSwingers · 10/09/2017 22:53

Can I give this a really really early vote for Classics GrinGrinGrinGrinGrin

hackmum · 10/09/2017 22:56

Gross

Soupfordinner · 10/09/2017 23:00

I was served tomato soup with garden peas over tagliatelle once Confused

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