To think that the 45p 'business travel mileage' rate isn't for lifts between friends?

[MelodyNelson10]

This is about something that's kind of over and done with now, so I'm not really looking for advice but I'm still really curious to see whether most people think AIBU or not.

My friend gave me (and others) a lift in a her car a few times last year and the year before. These were for pretty long distances, a couple of hundred miles or so, when we were going to some events together. A hen party of a mutual friend and a music festival, for example.

I'm obviously very grateful to her for driving all that distance. However, at the end of the journey when we asked 'how much do we owe you for petrol?' she would always say that she needed to work it out according to the government's per-mile figure to factor in wear and tear etc. That figure is 45p per mile, waaaay more than just the cost of petrol.

Was this fair? The way I understand it, that figure is intended for people claiming back tax for mileage they've used for business purposes, NOT for charging your friends for lifts! But I'm prepared to be told that I'm wrong here.

I haven't accepted a lift from her in a while and don't intend to, so it's kind of a moot point now anyway. But we are still friends and it plays on my mind sometimes as I can't help feeling like there's something a bit off about the whole thing.

So... AIBU?

Our family/friends only split petrol if its a long drive. More than an hour each way. Start with a full engine, refil to full once home and split the cost of that top up.

OlennasWimple not really. We really help eachother out and to us it feels fair. It's not tit for tat wriiten down. You just feel what is necessary.

Everybody gets that someone in the middle of a divorce needs lots of help and won't give anything back for a while. I've known this friendship group for almost 20 years. It always evens out somehow. People always get to deal with bad stuff in their lives and need help sooner or later. It's nice to help someone out or pay something for them if they have done the same for you in the past.

It maybe does also help that nobody is afraid to ask for a favour.

If you would rather use public transport or walk you should just say so.

That's what I've done whenever it's come up more recently. I'm a bit of a wuss and my friend can be hard to say no to sometimes, but now I just say I think it makes more sense for me to take the train.