Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To make an official complaint about colleague?

792 replies

Abouttoblow · 03/09/2017 15:12

I'm really don't want to go to work tomorrow as I've had enough of selfish workmate.
I really love my work. I've been in this job for 10 years, find it fulfilling, great terms and conditions but if things carry on I will go mad.
Colleague had twins 5 years ago and returned to work 2 days a week. Since she had her DC she seems to think that they take priority over her job - even when she is at work. Her DM and SIL take care of them so I would assume they are reliable and trustworthy but she rings them every half hour to check on things. Every half hour WITHOUT FAIL. She will even excuse herself from meetings.
My main issue though is that every appointment she has, doctor, dentist etc she arranges on the days she is at work. We have flexible working to accommodate for this, more so for full time staff who work every day, so we take shorter breaks or start early/finish late to make up the time but she doesn't bother. She just goes off for an hour or so at a time and that's it. This has been going on for years and I've spoken to my boss but nothing is ever addressed with her.
Anyway, her DC start school soon and she came in last week with a list of things she just MUST attend at school - prize givings, parents in-school days, assemblies and I know if they're on either of her 2 working days she will just go.
She won't have holiday leave to cover this as she is off for most of the summer and I'm sure she will want half term etc now too.
I've just had enough and it makes me so angry that she thinks this is acceptable.
AIBU to make an official complaint to Personnel?

OP posts:
Guardsman18 · 10/10/2017 08:33

Shall we get the betting going as to whether she rings in sick tomorrow?!

PurpleStarInCashmereSky · 10/10/2017 08:46

Would have been much easier to sack her. Pisstaking with sick leave (which she will start doing next) is harder to prove and deal with.

What an idiot. If she just kept her head down at that first meeting and got her act together after, she would have got away with it!

CheeseAndWine71 · 10/10/2017 09:07

I feel a bit sorry for the first manager who has to turn down an urgent request for her to go to eg class assembly. If they say no manager will look very mean, and she is bound to call them out on it. Tricky situation.

TittyGolightly · 10/10/2017 09:28

Hopefully they have robust sickness policies that will catch any tricks she tries that way.

mmgirish · 10/10/2017 10:18

Awesome thread OP!

disahsterdahling · 10/10/2017 10:33

This system shows when someone is offline, logged in and, most importantly, active. If you are not using your keyboard or mouse it will show you as inactive

What system is that? That's actually quite scary! My laptop switches itself off after 10 mins inactivity, which is a pain if you are eg listening to a presentation at a teleconference. You need to keep wiggling the mouse.

EBearhug · 10/10/2017 10:41

Would have been much easier to sack her.

I don't suppose she'd have been telling everyone if she was given a final warning or something.

amusedbush · 10/10/2017 10:44

Fuck me, this thread is brilliant! Looking forward to any future updates!

FeralBeryl · 10/10/2017 10:51

Bloody Hell! Shock
Just read the whole thread, the thing that shocked me the most are the amount of people that thought this was acceptable !

It's multi level wrong:
It's stealing, if you worked in Tesco and one of your colleagues left work each day with a stereo or a toaster or a bag of shopping under their arm, would you just nod and smile?

It's endangering the service users, for example child services. They are so so fucking overstretched which literally risk lives. Every hour counts for these staff.

It's awful for morale. Consistency is key in organisations. I've managed large groups of staff within the NHS and I'd be gutted to think teams were feeling obliged to carry a colleague like this.
The vast majority of staff struggle and plan to fit everything in so why on earth should there be unofficial exceptions to this rule.
If everyone did the same, whole organisations would implode!

Keep us posted OP, glad things look like they're improving. Can you request regular team meetings to include things like this each month too?
Your manager needs to keep the ball rolling on this one.

Ploppie4 · 10/10/2017 11:04

Your managers have been kind. Although they could have picked this issue up a long time ago if they had been more observant

RiotAndAlarum · 10/10/2017 11:26

@TittyGoLightly, I'm really glad to hear that! It does seem incredibly odd, though, that she's been, and is being, permitted so much opportunity to tell her side of the story. Discretion is a virtue, yes, but management has to communicate as well!

Rachel0Greep · 10/10/2017 11:27

Great outcome, OP. As I commented upthread, I worked with someone like this. Not a flexitime set up but she could be a sister of your co-worker Grin.
Never on time, first thing was a good hour spent in the coffee dock, numerous cigarette breaks, and we were on a high floor of the building so that added to the time required for said breaks. She had the phone glued to her ear any time she actually WAS at her desk, talking to her mother about her children...
Thankfully I didn't stay on that team for long. Her blatant p1ss taking was totally ignored by her manager which made me completely lose respect for him. Like your colleague she lived in her own version of the world where work was a minor detail and had to be fitted in occasionally around her personal stuff. Oh and sick days were regularly featured also.

GreenTulips · 10/10/2017 12:34

You need to keep wiggling the mouse.

Or going into your setting and change the sleep mode to longer

(As you were)

Yokohamajojo · 10/10/2017 13:07

Wow! Great outcome!
I used to work with someone in an open plan office, who blatantly sat at her desk playing candy crush. She claimed it was downtime and she had finished her tasks or that she managed her own time and got her job done. She really was something. Office was really badly managed and lots of different line managers who were academics and just happened to have management responsibilities but not the training for it. She eventually got moved sideways but still thinks she's the bees knees (still have her on FB)

Original poster
Abouttoblow · 10/10/2017 13:07

Update..... I think this may be the last!

She's gone Shock

She emailed management last night. Boss told us this morning

OP posts:
mateysmum · 10/10/2017 13:12

WOW!

Bet she's now busy looking for another job where she can take the piss.

Great outcome though. I reckon she probably still thinks she is a victim and will tell anyone who will listen that it's all a stitch up and SO UNFAIR!

Original poster
Abouttoblow · 10/10/2017 13:14

Sorry. Posted too soon

She emails the rest of us this morning. Tells us that her family, children and personal life are her priority and slams the rest of us for being unable or unwilling to get the work/life balance right! What the actual fuck?

Probably going to get flamed for starting the ball rolling that's lead to someone leaving their job but you know what I don't care! She's responsible for her own actionsAngry

And of course working no notice therefore no hand off of work/caseload etc.

She's an absolute fuckwit Angry

OP posts:
RavenclawRealist · 10/10/2017 13:15

Took the sanctions so she could quit instead if he fired!! She definitely isn’t as stupid as she acts!

FarceFace · 10/10/2017 13:17

wow - what a sanctimonious CF. I take it back - 'my family are my priority' - well exactly who's family isn't their priority :)

FortunatelyUnfortunately · 10/10/2017 13:18

Good riddance. Shock at criticising everyone else for their lack of work life balance. Stupid cow.

Original poster
Abouttoblow · 10/10/2017 13:39

Dahling Your laptop may "go to sleep" but if you are connected to any kind of network chances are they can see exactly what you are or are not doing.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 10/10/2017 13:47

Good news! Hopefully she will be replaced with someone who does their 16 hours per week!

BlueSapp · 10/10/2017 13:54

I think she might’ve had the last laugh, because she quit she Has the possibility to initiate a tribunal where she could claim victimisation, it would be right up her street.

Zaurak · 10/10/2017 14:00

Jeez.

My family are my priority, always. That doesn’t mean I sack off work whenever I feel like it, it means I’ve taken career hits to have the time to be with them, etc.
When I’m at work I’m working - of course if there was a genuine emergency I’d drop everything. Similarly I do work extra hours/weekends often in order to get the ‘brownie points’ that enable me to be flexible.

It goes two ways. She’s a loon.

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 10/10/2017 14:11

She slammed you for working?!? Sorry but she is probably the most obtuse person I've ever heard of!

She gets caught wagging and basically being a lazy arse and decides to have a go at everyone else?!

She is something else. Don't let her get to you. You're well rid. Hope your work is much easier now she's gone and you get someone in who, you know, actually works!!!

Look forward to her later email when she suddenly remembers she might need a reference....