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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To make an official complaint about colleague?

792 replies

Abouttoblow · 03/09/2017 15:12

I'm really don't want to go to work tomorrow as I've had enough of selfish workmate.
I really love my work. I've been in this job for 10 years, find it fulfilling, great terms and conditions but if things carry on I will go mad.
Colleague had twins 5 years ago and returned to work 2 days a week. Since she had her DC she seems to think that they take priority over her job - even when she is at work. Her DM and SIL take care of them so I would assume they are reliable and trustworthy but she rings them every half hour to check on things. Every half hour WITHOUT FAIL. She will even excuse herself from meetings.
My main issue though is that every appointment she has, doctor, dentist etc she arranges on the days she is at work. We have flexible working to accommodate for this, more so for full time staff who work every day, so we take shorter breaks or start early/finish late to make up the time but she doesn't bother. She just goes off for an hour or so at a time and that's it. This has been going on for years and I've spoken to my boss but nothing is ever addressed with her.
Anyway, her DC start school soon and she came in last week with a list of things she just MUST attend at school - prize givings, parents in-school days, assemblies and I know if they're on either of her 2 working days she will just go.
She won't have holiday leave to cover this as she is off for most of the summer and I'm sure she will want half term etc now too.
I've just had enough and it makes me so angry that she thinks this is acceptable.
AIBU to make an official complaint to Personnel?

OP posts:

LoveProsecco · 03/10/2017 20:06

She is more bonkers than we all though! Thanks for the update I’ve just laughed a lot

Darthvadersmuuuum · 03/10/2017 20:08

Shamelessly placemarking for further updates of the CF

Auspiciouspanda · 03/10/2017 20:11

what a fucking piss taker. im a local authority employee with flexitime and im gob smacked at how shes been able to do this for so long.

if it makes you feel better me and loads of my colleagues would have dobbed her in ages ago why the hell should everyone else work for 40/30/16 (hours my colleagues does) and she doesnt and abuse of flexi is a sackable offence!

ToadsforJustice · 03/10/2017 20:12

Her attitude just blows my mind. She has five days a week to do her personal stuff. How can she not see that?

ToadsforJustice · 03/10/2017 20:16

DH has just said the CF should work an extra day a week for the next twelve months (not making up flexi) to pay back the hours she's stolen!

Original poster

Abouttoblow · 03/10/2017 20:19

Toads It's even worse when you see what her "personal stuff" is! Not always related to her DC.
Off for more than an hour to take her husband's wedding ring to him as he went to work without it. An hour to be at her mum's for a washing machine delivery. Mum was also there but she wanted to make sure everything was OK! Mum is a very able 60 year old

OP posts:

DJBaggySmalls · 03/10/2017 20:21

Hopefully Personnel are now aware and keeping an eye on her...

MadamePomfrey · 03/10/2017 20:23

She doesn’t grasp flexi time at all dose she I would like to be a fly on the wall at the meeting where she tries to explain her logic to personnel

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 03/10/2017 20:26

It's madness I tell you!

Well done for not grabbing her by the shoulders and shaking her for being such a numpty. I agree with the others. She's setting herself up for a fall. Leave her to it and hopefully all your problems will be over

Thanks for coming back op. Hope you had a lovely holiday!

Brighteyes27 · 03/10/2017 20:27

Sorry for you OP. I have a colleague a bit similar but not as dim and not in your colleagues league for taking the pee.
She once went away for the weekend and phoned in sick on the Monday. We all knew she was away as it was a Centre Parcs. She was always coming in at 9 but going home by 10ish as either her son or daughter or elderly father was poorly. We aren't on flexi but she say she was making the time up by saying she was foregoing lunch breaks for a certain time period but then forgot, still went for lunch or stood in a long queue in the canteen for lunch. Like your colleague she always has to have first dibs of half terms and all school hols. If a meeting is held on one of our days off she can't commit until she has asked her in laws (even though both her kids are at school and the meetings don't start before 10 and she can only stay for two hours). Again all her doctors dentist and any hospital appointments always occur on her working days and she never makes the time up.

BananaShit · 03/10/2017 20:51

Piss taker, but still though OP, tread carefully. I've just read through the whole thread and was thinking when I saw the personnel outline thingy you requested that you'd done the right thing there. Much more sensible than complaining. I'd continue to deal with things in that more tactical manner.

Timeywimey8 · 03/10/2017 20:54

Can she just "up" her hours like that anyway? I think most of us who work part-time would need budgetary approval before we could increase our hours.

As for all the people who thought the OP should not say anything, don't any of you have ethics policies in your organisation? In mine, we are all supposed to be Stasi-like informers and report things. Organisations generally have whistleblowing policies, too, though I suppose the NHS is well known for its bad treatment of whistleblowers.

As for those of you who say it's fine to make appointments for your working days because you can't take the kids...have you thought about paying for extra childcare? Why should the employer subsidise you? If you can't take the kids, organise childcare. Don't take time off from your job unless you make it up. When I worked 4 days a week when ds was small I paid for a full-time nursery place (it didn't cost much more than 4 days a week did, and was well worth it, both for personal things and for when I needed to be flexible for work). The OP mentioned having a scale and polish, that is not an urgent appointment and should be fitted in outside working hours. A hospital appointment is different. I know people are going to argue that they can't afford extra childcare, but is it really reasonable to slack at work?

I work PT and I arrange all my appointments for outside my working hours, except for the time when I broke a tooth and needed it fixing when they could fit me in. But routine appointments are always outside my working hours.

Appuskidu · 03/10/2017 20:59

Nope! She tells me she is not taking on any more work/clients/extra duties she's just going to be "coming in" for an extra day!!!

WTF!! But is your boss likely to go for it??

Original poster

Abouttoblow · 03/10/2017 21:05

It will be unlikely that she can increase her hours as another member of staff does 3 days which technically makes up 1 FT person IFSWIM, although not classed as job share.
And there is no way our boss would accept the just "coming in" an extra day without picking up more work.
She just doesn't seem to get it

OP posts:

Jux · 03/10/2017 21:21

She sounds hilarious! Too thick to hold down a proper job - or too cunning? I've known people like her actually get the tterly unreasonable things they want just by pretending they actually believe the unresoablerap they're spouting; hr in one case just got too frustrated to carry on explaining.

HidingBehindTheWallpaper · 03/10/2017 21:21

So is she going to be working 16 hours still but spread over 3 days?

Original poster

Abouttoblow · 03/10/2017 21:44

Hiding I think that she thinks she will be getting paid for 3 days but not actually doing 3 days work. She th8nks you get credit for "showing up"

OP posts:

EBearhug · 03/10/2017 21:45

Does she really not understand that she has 5 days a week to do personal stuff, when full-time have just 2?

Original poster

Abouttoblow · 03/10/2017 21:45

Jux You are absolutely spot on! Although I don't think it'll fly this time

OP posts:

bringbacksideburns · 03/10/2017 22:01

She's not dim or stupid. She knows exactly what she's doing. I've worked with people like this. She's also assertive/confrontational, spectacularly selfish and thinks she's doing nothing wrong!
Not sure how it will all pan out OP but I'm bewildered as to why the colleagues on her team aren't speaking up unless she flies under the radar, has no team, no deadlines, no cases?? It's all very odd. Is someone covering for her and picking up the shortfall? Does she not have targets and reports to do?

I'd be just thankful her lazyness does not directly affect your work and wonder at the colleagues who remain silent, frankly.

Appuskidu · 03/10/2017 22:03

She sounds as thick as mince! Please report back when she has requested this extra day! Presumably she won't tell the boss that she won't be taking on any new work, just doing more hours to do her existing work!!

Original poster

Abouttoblow · 03/10/2017 22:25

I shall definitely update after the meeting if she tells me about it

OP posts:

Popfan · 03/10/2017 22:32

Great update - thanks for coming back! Definitely keep us updated!

MTverystressed · 03/10/2017 23:04

Just read the full thread and this has made me laugh, your colleague is actually something else op!

YetAnotherNC2017 · 03/10/2017 23:27

What an absolute twat she is.

I’d be emailing the HR contact that’s dealing with her request to increase her hours and relaying the conversation you had with her....

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