To be fed up of Instamums 2

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Continued from original post...

Sadly Susie has probably gained loads of followers from this. If you go into the open ig feeds of a lot of the commenters it's obvious that they are aspiring to commodify their feeds too, so I'm actually not that surprised that they are coming out in wholehearted support.

Meh, Susie still hasn't answered anything related to how staged Instagram is in regards to all these perfect moments.

How convenient

I've just watched SV's instastories (never heard of her before this thread) and it smacks of irony. Vitriolic Psychos indeed

Yes langkaw. One of the responses on pukka's post called her a 'warrior' and I thought hang on a minute.

I also think these women who get freebies should declare them as such so we can understand why they're raving about every single aspect of eg a holiday. It is payment in kind so an ad.

Yes. It's all very surreal. All of it. None of us know what we're doing but I can't berate people for being lovely. The cynic in me wonders what it's all about sometimes but all I do know is these conversations are important.

I get called all sorts. Cunt Pukka was a firm favourite.

My instagram is private and I have relatively few followers. Every now and then a wannabe insta-mum will request to follow me. Why is this? Are they trying to get me to follow them back (and then they'll stop following me?) to try and slowly increase numbers? That's the only thing I can think of.

Lol at massive elephant twat. Where do these idiots get these lines?

I think it's great mother pukka that you're getting involved in the discussion on here and engaging in the conversation, asking your followers for feedback etc. I also agree that not all support should be dismissed as "fawning".

I'm not sure why this discussion has got so us (mn) vs them (intagram followers). Personally I fall into both categories as many people on here seem too. So by susie criticising the mn people she is in fact criticising many of her own followers isn't she?

I do think some of this thread has become a bit like people are trying to find anything to criticise/pick an argument with now like nothing the "instamums" do now can be right. Some of the comments on here are needlessly mean and judgemental in tone which makes it harder for us to argue that this is a reasoned debate...

The reactions are quite interesting. We don't all watch the same to shows or films and all have the same opinion, we don't all feel the same about things we come across. It's ok to find things annoying or irritating and whilst in black and white it might read more bitchy or sarcastic, actually we all do say 'that's really annoying' about things in life. On Instagram there's no platform for that. It gets deleted or the person gets put up in stories and anihalated. I know MOD has been mentioned a lot, but I think this is where people's feelings for her change, she has done this several times. Screenshot other instagrammers who've then been destroyed by hundreds of dm's and posts because of the public shaming. I've never seen other high profile instagrammers do this, even that SV, who seems more angry and bitchy than anyone on mumsnet as there is no mistaking her tone or meaning. Instagrammers can delete comments and block people so in that sense it's very controlled.
Ads clearly have a place on Instagram and maybe it's about balance.

Oh and did anyone see Giovanna Fletcher's instagram recently from her freebie holiday? I can't decide whether I like her or not. But a whole holiday free when she's already rich seemed a bit off to me. I have less issue with "normal" mums who make their instagram into a bit of a business and attract a lot of followers, but famous-ish already people who are already really rich getting more freebies? It just didn't seem that right.

yes, agree that the Them vs Us stance taken by some is odd. we have people who want to write for a living. we have people on this thread who are clearing looking to access interesting content and give constructive advice on what they want to see. I'd think engaging with the thread (like Mother Pukka has) would be beneficial to all.

Oh, and I was even called a cunt at work this week as well .

Mother pukka, there is nothing wrong with people who like something, commenting positive support and getting on with their day without reading 47 pages of conversation by strangers about Instagram. In a world where there's so much nastiness, people being nice and supportive is a good thing.

Morning this still going. I did follow SV then her very nasty rant put me right off her so I unfollowed. I don't need that negativity in my life #loveyourself.

I'm going to find some Drag Queens , I reckon they'll be good fun.

Ready teddy: discussing the issues of child exploitation and the murkiness of advertising and the nature of censorship isn't finding fault just for the sake of it. These are important issues that need to discussing. It might sound nasty at times but that's the nature of having conversation with lots of different people. People obviously feel strongly about this and want to have their say.

Positive support is great. Dismissing the whole of MN as a bunch of jealous bitches is not.

but famous-ish already people who are already really rich getting more freebies?

That has happened since the dawn of time of time though. I can't really fault anyone for not turning down freebies tbh. I just think it comes down to how transparent they are about it. More or less, everything MOD has posted lately has been an ad or a freebie, she just hasn't made it clear. (And it's not obvious to everyone as someone upthread said she'd only done 10 #ads this year. Yeah, ok...).

Oh, and not just ads, also trying to blag themselves a new washing machine on the pretence of asking her following which brand is best after hers broke down.

It's the nature of the platform. It's not meant to be a place of discussion, really.

There are a few comments on many posts that are considered. dMBL40 always gets comments from other mums with SN kids who basically say Yep, me too, it's shit sometimes isn't it, keep on keeping on, you're not alone. And one can see how it's become much more than a business platform for her. And people like dear Orla who writes so beautifully about baby loss and has I'm sure been a great find for other parents who've experienced that.

So I'm not dismissing Instagram at all.

But with the accounts that are basically kids + clothes + holidays, the comments seem to skew differently. There's a lot of people basically throwing flowers at the performer on the stage. And I can't help but wonder what the effect on you that would have, 365 days a year. No wonder anything negative would be upsetting.

But anyone who puts a product from a "brand" out onto the market should welcome feedback on how that product needs to be tweaked. If a product is starting to irritate, you go back to the drawing board and listen to where people think it's gone wrong. Except on Instagram, where you can have so many followers that you never have to care that much. You've become too big to fail.

Giovanna is top of the podcasts chart this morning.

Social media can be a wonderful place and more so because you get to choose what you want to see on your feed.

I agree that some #ads don't come across as genuine and stand out as paid for nonsense. I have unfollowed some when they started stuff I (and I suspect most of their audience) couldn't relate to ...e.g. Hugely expensive make up brands

To me, these bloggers are doing what they want and can get paid for. I'm not going to get massively annoyed by it to the extent of still following . There's many more bloggers out there

Langkaw I agree it's a very interesting and important discussion. But is a shame some people are being a bit overly critical/ petty as it makes the whole discussion/ thread open to being dismissed as people just being bitchy then I guess. Kind of sullies that side of the fence.

Also I find it a bit annoying that even though mother pukka is on here answering questions and being involved, people are still continuing talking about her like she's far removed from it. Seems a bit rude/disrespectful to me

Watched the SV story. The irony of her being nasty about other people being nasty!

As for some "behind the scenes info" well duh. I think we all got that "mums who make leggings" asked you to mention that product in return for a free sample. And yes supporting mums who want to work from home () is great. But Jacobs Creek, Boots, Mark Warner are big proper brands using this "phenomenon" to sell their stuff and you're just using the smaller brands to build your brand so the bigger brands will work with you

The responses to the different Instagram accounts on here are worth noting I think. Everyone seems to be unanimous about the fact that DMBL40 is a very good thing. She genuinely seems to use Instagram as a supportive/venty thing and it works.

Coming across as human and likeable Doesn't necessarily mean jamming up the whole 'were a chaotic messy family just like you thank god we have method floor wash to help us.' The audience is a bit more discerning than that (the audience on this thread I mean!)

Some instagrammers are brilliant and do come across with humility and the sense that they sometimes struggle just like the rest of us. Others do not and it comes across as cynical and a bit exploitative.

I've worked with some really big brands and have nowhere near the followers as these mentioned.

The funniest thing of all is that if you all sat back and read through your comments once in a while you'd realise that you're judging other mums for being 'judgey' and 'bitchy'. Yes they may have more money and better houses but surely that is the point that a lot of them are making? In the sense that they are just as normal as us mums and go through the same stuff with our kids. Mother pukka may go out to fancy events but hey she goes out and ends up with leaky nips just like we do. Susie has helped me alot as a young mum to realise that everyone has those 'fuck it' moments as a parent and were all just getting on with it and doing it, she shows the less glamorous side of parenting that a lot of people who have a big following would be begrudged to show. As compared to coming on here when no ones actually giving any advice or insight into parenting just moaning about parents who may have more money than them or may have the pleasure of advertising goodies that we may me interested in or may be fortunate enough to go to snazzy events (which I'm sure we would all say yes too). Everyone's living different lifestyles and you may think the money means that they aren't real like you when in actual fact I'm sure they come across the same problems with their children as you do.... if you don't like it then unfollow its very simple and will save you from all getting stressed out about people you don't know.