To refuse to buy DS age 12 Grand Theft Auto?

[mrsmootoo]

DS, 12, has started asking for GTA because 'all his friends have it'. I have looked at various online discussion sites, some of which have parents who say it's not that bad; others feel the language and sex is OTT. I have discovered that DS does in fact have some '18' games and these do seem very violent, sadly, so maybe I'm being unreasonable about GTA. DS is at great pains to try and explain to me the difference between the 'story' game which you apparently have to download once you've bought the disc, and the 'playing online' version which he could do with his friends and supposedly doesn't have all the sex in it. Any thoughts welcome!

I agree with the banned on principle argument. GTA is just grim.

COD is violent but it's the attitude to women in GTA which means I would still not let DS have it in the house even though he's now an adult.
FWIW I don't like the violence in gaming but I have two of the gentlest, kindest DSs now 19/21 and it hasn't done them any harm.

There are some vile offensive people who play online though. I only used to let them chat to real life friends.

YANBU.

My DSs know that GTA will never be in a house I live in and we discussed my reasons.

I am holding firm on CoD for the time being (they are 13 and 14 and "all their friends have it" - which is actually true for many of them), but they do have some FinalFantasy and JustCause.

It it a minefield to try and get the balance right between social ostracisation and overly harsh "you will do as I say" parenting.

www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/08/12/grand-theft-auto-rape_n_5671400.html

To those who say that "everyone else has it" isn't true, in the case of gaming I'm afraid it is. I know for sure that all DC gamer friends had GTA as well as CoD before they were 13.

I was when a colleague at work told me she planned to buy GTA for her ten year old, he'd told her it was a car game. I described it and she was horrified.

www.polygon.com/2014/12/10/7364823/gta-5s-vicious-misogyny-ought-to-be-addressed-not-ignored

My mum always made it clear that she didn't care what "everyone else's" parents do. She made her own decisions, was more relaxed than the majority on some issues and stricter on others.

I respect her for that.

I would give in on things like COD if he was particularly mature but GTA will not enter this house. It's vile and disgusting. Even DP doesn't play it. He's never shown any interest in it but knows if he had, our relationship never would have happened. I can't abide it.

So many parents of my boys' friends are gamers themselves, so maybe dad has whatever 18 game in the house and the children simply grow up with CoD or GTA or whatever - I judge, I do, I think it's wrong to wean your young children on head exploding and first person shooter experiences.

I tell my boys that I don't really care what everybody else is doing and while I do not stop them from going to their friends' houses (where they play whatever - I am not naive), I will insists on certain rules at home.

There are some useful websites for parents that advise on how bad games are/what caused their rating.

I wouldn't let a 12 year old have it, it is a mature game. However, no surprise to see the usual hysterics on here about the game, especially by people who hear 'the worst bits' about it and decided that's all they're about .

There are actually worse games out there, with lower ratings, but GTA is the easy bait to go to. I especially love how they think letting teenagers play it results in violent human beings or teaches that sort of behaviour is ok. If your children mimic what they've seen on games or television, that's down to other factors, not media.

DH has GTA, it's incredibly violent . GTA V he struggled with the ending choices due to his MH problems. You have to choose the ending and you either have to betray you friends/kill them or be killed. DH as an adult was really shaken by this and struggled with guilt over his decision, asking my opinion on if it made him a bad person despite it being just a game.

CommonsenseMedia

AskAboutGames

ESRB - rating board - I am not that bothered about swear words, for instance, so went with JustCause3 even though it's an 18. The consensus seems to be that it was a harsh rating for what it is.

They used to play Skate3 when they were quite young and that was a 16 - some mild swearing and you could run over pedestrians which was kind of a glitch but still...

My husband, our friends and I have played GTA 5, it is absolutely not suitable for children or under 18s. I would actually say it's one of those games, some adults would find too much!

Hi, we have GTA V, its a great game....but isn't for children for a reason. If you want to look at examples of what happens in the story mode, just type in on YouTube 'GTA V missions'. Loads of stuff will come up, all missions start with a cut scene, and you will see for yourself the content involved, I personally wouldn't be surprised if your ds really wants the game he may have seen some parts already. I personally would tell him no.HTH

I can guarantee that all his friends do not have it, or I hope not at least. Even if your DS does only want to play the online version (which isn't as bad as the main game), he would still have the main game available for him to play. Apart from the violence there's prostitution, racism, sexism, torture....the list goes on. It is definitely NOT a game I would let my kids play.
As for his other 18 rated games, look them up on YouTube. You may be ok with your DS playing violent games but as many people have already said, they're rated 18 for a reason.

Off topic slightly but what's wrong with Nestle and Sky?

@bluebanana,
You don't have to either kill or betray your friends, there's a third way, you can get out of the dilemma.
I love gta5 but it's not a kid's game.

It's a brilliant game. Probably going to be the bestselling game of all time apart from Minecraft and Tetris.

Incredibly, nearly four years after release, it is still charting well around the world. It was the fifth bestselling game in the UK last week. The week before, it was number two.

It's stupid to buy it for children, though.

*Today 15:02 Notreallyarsed

In Scotland if a primary aged child goes into school and says they've been playing GTA it triggers automatic child protection proceedings. I know your DS isn't primary age, I used that example to show how awful the game is. COD is violent and extremely realistic warfare in the main (DP is a war veteran) so I'd dodge that for a 12 yo too.*

No it doesn't many school age children have these games, and I know lots of teachers in Scotland, family and friends whose own children have 18plus games and it's well known in our group. Funnily they don't have SS involvement even my nieces talk openly about COD and GTA as it's currently the in thing.

They have both games but from 2008 (I think) when it was a mere 12/16 rating

HaudYerWheeshtBawbag according to DS1's headteacher it does. Whether schools follow it is another matter but the legislation is there. And rightly too. If parents are letting kids play games like that at primary age, they're clearly not parenting well are they? So thanks for the face, but it really wasn't necessary.

They have both games but from 2008 (I think) when it was a mere 12/16 rating

GTA4 was a 12/16 rating?

They have both games but from 2008 (I think) when it was a mere 12/16 rating

I don't think GTA was ever below an 18, even the very original versions (which now is quite laughable compared to the new-gen content). CoD definitely had a lower rating release though, as violent as they are.

No surprise though, I know a popular game where tourture is rife yet only rated a 12. Popular as well, I bet a few people's precious children have played it.

No, we also have a "it will never be allowed in this house" stance. Ds are both resolved to the fact and aren't bothered at all now.

Lots of their friends have GTA and CoD.