Reach your kids some fucking consideration! [ranty]

[someonestolemynick]

This has been inspired by the mummy who let her two charming kids scoot around Tesco. But it also goes out to the geniuses who keep their little darlings watch Peppa Pig on the bus or the pub. The parent who doesn't think it necessary to teach their kids that the appropriate response to bumping into another human is to apologise.
I have noticed this more and more: children (being children) act loud, entitled or aggressive and the accompanying adult smiles indulgently rather than correcting behaviour that infringes on others.

Ianbu

If other people's children's behaviour effects you when you are out, perhaps you should stay home

Or maybe perhaps parents should actually teach their children and manners and respect and then we wouldnt have as many threads on here about rude entitled adults eh?

Loyalty. Don't worry you haven't offended me. I object to being told that if you don't mind twattish behaviour, I shouldn't mind either. But that's an easy mistake to correct. You have definitely amazed me though.

@SnickersWasAHorse - I don't understand how that is victim blaming, I never once said that it was OP fault.

I was in a pub the other day. A couple of kids (aged 4 and 7 maybe) had been sent to sit at a separate table from their parents and were given an iPad to amuse them. Cue tinny noises from some programme or other. I glared at the parents but they declined to notice me. So I just asked the older of the 2 kids to please turn the volume down, as it was disturbing us. He apologised and turned it down immediately - seemed like a lovely kid. So sometimes it may be better to ask the offending child directly rather than the parents.

@LagunaBubbles - A lot of bad behaviour is down to parenting, but that's none of my business as many parents find it hard to disclipine and teach right from wrong.

Ohtheholidays I wouldn't leave somewhere because my son is having a negative effect unless it was extreme. We and he are entitled to a life to. A lot of NT behaviour has a negative effect on him but he has to put up with it. It goes both ways.

Our most recent annoyances have been adults.

Odd looking family with fluffy dog in a buggy (?!) which barked and barked and barked disturbing everyone else eating their meals - outside restaurant. Weird looking mum fed it from her plate.Thought dh going to explode.

Just today dd aged 9 and I couldn't have a conversation because the one of the two sixty something female teachers at the next table had the LOUDEST voice ever. I know all about her job moans, oven cleaning habits etc. Dd and I gave up speaking as she was so fucking loud we could t hear each other. Rant over!

I don't understand how that is victim blaming, I never once said that it was OP fault.

LoyaltyandLobster it is victim-blaming. You are saying that if, for an example, an 86-year-old grandmother doesn't want to be shoved onto the ground in the supermarket, she should've stayed at home.

Cracks me up that people think we can actually control children's behaviour, and that if they do anything wrong it's because they haven't been taught properly by their parents. Particularly funny when parents of babies/toddlers think that 9 yr olds are mini adults and 'should know better.'

Parenting is tough and relentless. Children get excited, forgetful and are sometimes naughty. The summer holidays are flipping LONG and telling our kids off every minute for doing the wrong thing on a scooter or bumping into someone does not make for a happy time for anyone.

I was talking about extreme behaviour the kind that could be dangerous to others,ie a child skooting around on a outdoor toy in a shop or cafe/restaurant is bloody daft and could be very dangerous.

I'm disabled myself and the amount of shit I get of people that aren't disabled is disguting,we have enough to cope with without having to watch none of us are going to be run into or knocked over.

hellomarshmallow but if my overexcited child hurt someone else, then I would apologise, and take my kid away from the situation so that it didn't happen again. What's hard to understand about doing that?

My bugbear is toddlers and pre-school age kids running about in the supermarket. They are well below my eyeline, and I have lost count of the number of times I have almost fallen over a small child who has suddenly appeared right in front of me as they dash out at the end of an aisle.

Mind you, I dare say if I landed on the child, they would come off worse than me.

LoyaltyandLobster it is victim-blaming. You are saying that if, for an example, an 86-year-old grandmother doesn't want to be shoved onto the ground in the supermarket, she should've stayed at home

Why would you go to the extreme like that? I never said that and it, and don't know my thoughts, something like that would never ever cross my mind, who in their right mind would do something like that to an old lady??

I don't think scooting around type behaviour could be due to sn. That is just someone letting their child do what they want.

I was referring more to - who let her two charming kids scoot around Tesco. But it also goes out to the geniuses who keep their little darlings watch Peppa Pig on the bus or the pub

Those things above wouldn't bother me.

KERALA1 we had the same the other day except these 2 women were talking about they're sex lifes very loudly in front of they're own children and we had our DD9 who is asd with us and she could hear it all as well and this was at lunch time at a family attraction that is aimed towards children 12 and under,I had to say something in the end so they'd shut up.

I do wonder how some of these people have managed to keep they're poor children in one piece sometimes!

marshmellow, you'll notice that my post does not criticise children but the adults standing by.
I work with children and none of them are impeccably behaved all the time - but you address it: every.time. That's how they learn.
If your kid wants to scoot in the supermarket you say "no" and explain why. If they refuse, you take the scooter off them. You're the parent.

The summer holidays are flipping LONG and telling our kids off every minute for doing the wrong thing on a scooter or bumping into someone does not make for a happy time for anyone.

But being clattered into and scooted over is just a blast for all concerned? Might I suggest that if you can't control your children's behaviour (assuming they are NT, I'm well aware that some disabilities mean this is not possible) then not taking them to places where they're going to upset/annoy/bang into people is the only option?

Loyalty it was on this thread as a thing that has already happened, and I have already drawn your attention to it once before.

Cracks me up that people think we can actually control children's behaviour, and that if they do anything wrong it's because they haven't been taught properly by their parents.

Don't allow your child to take a scooter to the supermarket?
Also, you might find that a few of the other people posting are also parents.

ArcheryAnnie - Oh okay sorry, I hadn't read through the whole thread... that's why I was wondering why you said I was victim blaming.

I don't get what people have against using headphones. Low volume? What is the point? headphones provide a solution and are cheap and plentiful. We have two children with sen, always take tablets on long journeys and the rule is headphones or silent... simple. Ds with ASD is very sensitive to noise so he usually has his book or ds on silent to play games and ear defenders to keep out all the unwanted noise from other folks. I on the other hand have hearing aids in so I can hear what is going on around me! A right pair

LoyaltyAndLobster You still haven't told me how I'm supposed to ignore kids running around while I'm carrying a tray of hot drinks and hot food. Or did you realise that what you said was bullshit, too?

Or perhaps I should just stay home. Though if I did that, I wouldn't have a home for very long considering I didnt have a job anymore.

Those things above wouldn't bother me

How terrific for you.
Example one is not only annoying; it is dangerous though. To the kids scooting and people they could scoot into. Not to mention the fact that they were being surrounded by shelves full of breakable stuff. Surely as a parent or paid carer you think that far.
People playing videos on their phones is dickish behaviour. Their may not be danger involved but it's just not necessary. So it doesn't bother you. Great. Amazing. I'm really happy for you. It bothers enough people though to be at least worth some thought. Again, a two-year-old won't think of the people around them
That's where the parents come in: to provide head phones or a toy and am age appropriate explanation.

I am horrified to read some of this, your poor 86 year old GM. Trolleys hurt, especially if you are frail or have a bone condition. Wheelies & scooters are for parks and quiet wide pavements, not shopping centres nor busy places.

I confess my 3 DC when younger were v naughty sometimes, ninjaturtle-hurtling down supermarket aisles- but I wasn't far behind chasing them to firmly tell them off and make them apologise to those they'd gone near. It was mortifying at the time and I cringe.. even now that I once shouted in Asda "Rafaello stop now or I take your shell!!" . (Turtle name not DC's name!) We shopped online mostly for those years or I did a Sound of Music march with each child having a hand on trolley. Tough times 😁

As for letting your DC pee in someone's driveway- ewwwwww!!