To wish schools would enforce uniform rules

[SunshineAndSmile]

So DD wants to wear black trainers for school but the school says no branded trainer type shoes. Last year 'everyone' wore trainers and nothing happened. The school also say minimal makeup, minimal jewellery, no coloured nail varnish, no fake nails, no shortened skirts but why then do half the girls look like they are going clubbing. Why am I constantly arguing with DD about this when the school just makes rules but doesn't follow them through? I feel like am fighting a loosing battle.

WIBU to ask the school to actually enforce their uniform rules this year?

The better paid and more professional the job, the less likely you are to have to wear a uniform. What message does it send children to tell them they must dress alike? Preparation for a menial type job?

Fire service, police, nurses, paramedics. Not professional enough for you? Or are they 'menial'.

Pengggwn
You're clearly a horrible individual. You just want to crush the soul of a poor creative darling who wants nothing more than to express their individuality through the same acrylic talons that are all over instagram. After all, her nails don't affect her learning

TheViceOfReason
I can see how that COULD work.
I also know given how some parents can't get their head around the idea of black non-fashion trousers, black leather school shoes, no fake nails your good idea would probably fail in reality.

Next week we'll get all the local rags doing their 'my kid was sent home for not wearing uniform/having a shit haircut' stories, complete with compo face pictures.

I'm with you OP. The whole point of a uniform is that it is...uniform.

Pengggwn
Isn't that the standard line in those situations?
option 1
Child breaks rules
School sanction and request parental support.
Parents support the school
End of situation

option 2
Child breaks rules
School sanction and request parental support
Parents kick off and argue with school, often pointing out their child will not be attending detentions etc
School say 'fair enough but the policy for missing detentions is isolation' and put the child in isolation
Parent gets annoyed that school is ruining the learning after all 'they're only fake nails'.

Said parent can't seem to understand that one reason some schools nose dive (and then need very prescriptive rules) is because when there is a critical mass of parents like them that tip the balance and make it really difficult to teach.

Schools should have rules or not. To have rules and not enforce them is confusing and unfair on the kids.
I used to teach and it was a nightmare. "Mrs so and so lets me wear my nose piercing". Some kids excluded for dyed hair and others not. Rules ignored and then a sudden and draconian crackdown.

CockacidalManiac
Have you seen the Facebook page 'angry people in local newspapers'? It's hillarious.

I've already got bets on which schools in my area will be represented in the annual 'child was asked to follow uniform' story.

What was the school's problem with tights and socks?

MaisyPops

Yes; I follow him on twitter too.

If you choose to send your child to a school you should support the school rules and expectations. Parents who are unsupportive and rush to defend and make excuses for their DCs behaviour or failure to do homework are doing their DC no favours. DH has employed some trainees over the years and is astonished that they have parents phoning up to make daft excuses about why their precious little cherub cannot come to work, to say to go easy on them that they are 'a bit tired', or to complain if someone asks them to do something in the wrong tone of voice. I would be mortified if my parents ever did this.

questionable

I mentioned the socks and tights and i have no idea

I did ask them why but i got a whole lot of waffle and a 'thank you for your support' at the end

And i will support the school in 90% of stuff even if i dont agree with it, but no socks with tights is stupid

I'd rather not be specific Pengggwn but the trainee roles are office based and involve office admin and answering the phone not exactly back breaking work. Apparently talking on the phone is a skill that is lost on this generation but that's another thread.

People don't have a choice about sending their dc to school though, so you can't say that they chose the school and must suck up without question all of the rules. Many parents don't get their first (or any) choice of school and I don't know any schools that don't have a uniform.

I think schools have a responsibility to be sensible. So I can see why they would want minimal jewellery, no slug eyebrows, expect shoes to be a certain colour etc but struggle to see why some schools won't let kids remove blazers in the height of summer or object to socks and tights.

Pengggwn
I was referring to the OP's statement that parents chose to send their dc to a school and therefore have to support the rules/expectations. Given that parents don't have a choice, they are not under any obligation to support something they disagree with. Not all rules are good ones.

I think there is room for a teacher to recognise if an idea is ill advised (like wearing blazers in very hot weather) and to be sensible in not enforcing that rule. I wouldn't respect a teacher who was all about enforcing rules 'just because'.

The govt gives freedom to select home ed so that those parents who are capable of providing it can have the choice.
I'm presuming you did a degree and a PGCE (or similar) in order to become a teacher, yet you seem to think that teaching is something that all people can do. I suspect that most teachers would struggle to educate their own children in all subjects to gcse level, let along people without the training and experience. You devalue your own profession by saying this is a genuine choice available to all parents.

I don't see how two parents in full time work could home educate or people whose own education wasn't great.

I can't pick and choose between which rules to uphold. Either I support the expectations of the school, or the kids will ignore those expectations because of my inconsistency
This.
Though I can think of a few colleagues over time who just adore being the 'sound' one. 'Mr so and so doesn't make us... he lets us...' etc. When schools get too many teachers who want to be the 'sound' one / the one who gives in after every note it has the same effect as having a school where lots of parents undermine the school.

If we have an issue with something then we raise it privately with our leaders. Personally, I think setting homework weekly is ridiculous when I know my groups are doing more class work than another group down the corridor but I'd not voice it to the students.

If parents wish to queery a rule then they should contact the school and ask to speak to somone. There is almost no justification for parents sending their child in saying 'my mum/dad says I don't have to' to any rule they don't like.

I suspect that mostteacherswould struggle to educate their own children in all subjects to gcse level, let along people without the training and experience. You devalue your own profession by saying this is a genuine choice available to all parents.
I'd struggle in all subjects up to GCSE. I'd be fairly confident to the top of primary.

But you only have to look on some of the HE forums to see people claiming that a qualified teacher offers nothing to their child because all they need is to follow their interests and google stuff at secondary level.

That said, there are online platforms etc that some HE people use or they go down the route of tutoring - both can work well.

Some schools are more approachable than others. Some have an open door policy, with teachers regularly out on the playground, who hold meetings about changes, so parents feel involved and invested. Otoh I have come across a headteacher who won't answer emails for weeks so sometimes it really isn't straightforward to just contact the school and speak to someone.