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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think that this is NOT a thing!

116 replies

LloydColeandtheCoconuts · 28/08/2017 18:24

DD was due early August and DP, who works in FE, was on his summer holidays since mid July and my mat leave started early July. During that time he was running around doing DIY and dealing with DS (3) whilst I got things ready for the newborn and rested.
Anyway, baby was born and DP was getting stressed with DS' behaviour in the playground and ranted that he'd be going back to work soon and he hadn't had a holiday and the weather was shit and other things..Hmm. (I was and am sleep deprived and doing the majority of stuff with newborn). He then said that his friends' partners take themselves and their kids to their parents' houses to give the Dads a "break!" And it's not unusual. I said that I wasn't going to my mum's with the DC so he gets to have a time out from being a parent. And none of my friends do this!

I don't think I was BU at all! But I'm interested to hear if anyone has heard of this or does this.

OP posts:
AmysTiara · 28/08/2017 18:25

I've never heard of anyone doing this.

MrsMeeseeks · 28/08/2017 18:26

No, I don't do this and neither does anyone I know, as far as I'm aware. Parenting is pretty much a 24/7 kind of arrangement.

ChilliBanana · 28/08/2017 18:26

He is BU and a bit of a dick. Why can't he take the kids so you get a break? Congrats on your new born and please make sure you get taken care of xxx

Aquamarine1029 · 28/08/2017 18:26

Your partner is full of shit.

KentMum2008 · 28/08/2017 18:28

Not a thing. DH (not my DCs biological dad) takes the DCs out for the day so I can have a break, not the other way around Shock

loveulotslikejellytots · 28/08/2017 18:28

Nope, that sounds like hell to me. I've heard of the mother of the 'new' mum staying once the partner goes back to work to help out. But only where the mum/daughter have been really close.

I'm close to my mum but wanted my space once DH went back to work.

Littleorangecat2012 · 28/08/2017 18:29

He's having a laugh. He should be giving you a break if anything!

PandorasXbox · 28/08/2017 18:29

Nice try DH.

Cheeky sod. He's had a glimpse of what's in store for you!

thatstoast · 28/08/2017 18:30

Not with a newborn, no. Nobody gets a break!

gunsandbanjos · 28/08/2017 18:32

Another one who has never heard of this!

He's chancing his arm...

Bluntness100 · 28/08/2017 18:35

Jesus. He doesn't even have the balls to say it was his idea and what he wants, he tries to play it like people actually do this and it's not something he thought of in his own head. And not even to give mum a break but to give the dad a break.

Sorry, but what a spineless twat. Least he could do is be honest.

thepatchworkcat · 28/08/2017 18:35

Not a thing.

catbas · 28/08/2017 18:35

I've heard of this / we do this but it works both ways not just the dad!

QueenofLouisiana · 28/08/2017 18:36

Nope not here either. I used to take DS to my mum's for a few hours just before term started so DH could get his planning done.

The only time I did anything like that was when DH had to write his dissertation for his MA. My mum and I went on holiday together for a week (it was lovely).

theITgirl · 28/08/2017 18:36

Well, when I was on maternity leave about a million years ago. I did go and see my parents for a few days at a time. BUT it was to give me a break.

DH was back at work, so I might go say Monday to Thursday. Mum would look after me, so I only had to look after DS.

gazebowarrior · 28/08/2017 18:36

Is he going to take them to his parents for a bit so you get a break too?

elQuintoConyo · 28/08/2017 18:38

Diddums.

AlpacaLipsNow · 28/08/2017 18:38

That is sooo not a thing! He needs to stop being a twat.

perrypausal · 28/08/2017 18:39

Bless him. God loves a trier. Lol. I wish this was the case. I'd happily pack of OH and kids to my in laws after all. Whats good for the goose is good for the gander.

NerrSnerr · 28/08/2017 18:40

Nope, not a thing. When our eldest was about 3 months my husband had to go abroad with work for a week and my MIL suggested he spent a few days with them before the flight so he was well rested for the business trip. After I stopped laughing he politely declined. She hasn't suggested it since.

FlyingElbows · 28/08/2017 18:41

It's a "thing" in Mr Elbows' family (working class Irish Catholic) and his sisters are horrified that he doesn't behave like that. As far as he's concerned he gets all day to himself at work and he doesn't need the other hours as life spent in some sort of weird 1950s penis worship thing! He's a keeper Wink

Original poster
LloydColeandtheCoconuts · 28/08/2017 18:43

Yup, it certainly wasn't his finest hour! Thanks for your responses. Needless to say this won't be happening!

OP posts:
FartSmeller · 28/08/2017 18:44

Not a thing. We just got on with being parents.

arethereanyleftatall · 28/08/2017 18:45

No, we don't do this, but we have always alternated taking care of both of our dc on our own so that the other one gets a half day each at the weekend to have a break.

Neutrogena · 28/08/2017 18:47

This does happen quite regularly, if parents are retired.

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