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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

neighbours car has been in my garden for 3 months

565 replies

PastryOnMyMind · 26/08/2017 10:14

first ever thread but I wanted some opinions from the outside

neighbours came to me in early May to ask if they can use our drive for two weeks, they bought their DD a car for her birthday as a surprise.
fair enough I thought no problem

the car is still there.

we don't want to cause tension with the neighbours because we all have to live here

my DD is 14 month and has just started to toddle so would like front garden back to make safe ( weeding, gates) for her to play in and I can sit on the door step whenever she wabts to venture outside.

we managed to catch him last week and told him we want to do our garden for DD (can't use back garden, subsided and v unsafe) and asked if he had an idea of when he was planning to shift his car

two months!!! we were quite shocked because he was very matter of fact, no apology etc and dp said "it's kind of taking the piss" and neighbour shrugged it off. it's the end of October...

aibu to want my garden back before October so I can let my DD run loose in her own space whilst we may still have sunny weather/ light evenings??
part of me feels selfish because we don't drive so don't have a car therefore a "drive way" in the literal meaning isn't needed. but our garden IS the drive way.

I'm quite timid and have no idea how to go about this whole situation so I was hoping some mumsnet opinions might help me figure out what to doGrin

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
maddening · 27/08/2017 20:32

Hhope the rest is a calm and speedy resolution - don't hesitate to report any further bad behaviour!

Original poster
PastryOnMyMind · 27/08/2017 20:36

I agree. doesn't matter who you are with drink or no drink. 2am waking a baby and still carrying on isn't normal behaviour!
and yeah I don't believe they're sorry. they're not sorry for leaving their car, waking my child or shouting at our door at 2am, they're sorry that the police have come and bollocked them.
feels like school all over again!

I will definitely let you know how it goes.
and as for civilised areas, a lot of areas arou d here are just awful. but we live in a lovely street full of retired people and couples with children. everybody seems to have a gardener and cleaner (apart from us. maybe one day Grin) friendly street. so it was quite a he'll of a shock that they turned into something off nightmare neighbours when they just seemed quite normal.

can I confirm that I am just a little bit less wet now? possibly just a damp cloth, or squeezed sponge? GrinWink

OP posts:
Gemini69 · 27/08/2017 20:43

OP I just want to apologise for calling your DP a Dick... very naught and bad of me... I am sorry ... Blush

Anxiety is a terrible affliction.. you have my sympathies ..

Congratulations on getting the right help there and solving the problem yourself.. you have done brilliantly Lady Flowers

Enjoy sharing your good news with DP Smile

Willow2017 · 27/08/2017 20:54

Well done Pastry

Now they know you mean business they might lose thier sense of entitlement and stroppy attitude.

Great result although another week isn't great. They have had months to sort out insurance. But police have your back now that should help you a lot.

PuffinNose · 27/08/2017 20:55

Proud of you - well done!

Now, while you know what you can acheive... get that back garden sorted. You are being fobbed off with that too.

PuffinNose · 27/08/2017 20:57

Should add - might be worth keeping a log of dates/times/interactions/witnesses for anything to do with them. Hopefully it's over now but just for a while in case there are any ither issues.

Original poster
PastryOnMyMind · 27/08/2017 21:06

yes I'll keep a log. I'm glad I took a letter. and photos of car from all angles just in case they try to say we've done anything to it.
I've always lurked on mumsnet, before I even had DD. glad I posted. I think I'll stick around Grin

and yes calling agents on Tuesday for update on fireplace.
will mention the garden.
life is looking brighter Star

OP posts:
Wreckingball25 · 27/08/2017 21:09

Well done you, pastry!
Feels like a proper victory for you Smile

GirlInTheDirtyShirt · 27/08/2017 21:11

Oh well done Pastry. Brilliant result. You're not wet at all, just a lovely quiet person who's been taken advantage of. Lesson learned!

KitKat1985 · 27/08/2017 21:11

Well done Pastry!

peekyboo · 27/08/2017 21:19

The agents definitely need to know about your bother, even if it's sorted out (very well done!!), because the neighbours might try it on with anyone who rents the house after you as well

Leeds2 · 27/08/2017 21:21

Good Luck with your interview!

Ta1kinPeece · 27/08/2017 21:21

Just RTFT
Well done pastry
the first time you stand up for yourself is the hardest
from now on it will get easier

LakieLady · 27/08/2017 21:39

Great work, Pastry!

Well done for getting it sorted, I know how tough it can be to do things you're anxious about.

Bigoldsupermoon · 27/08/2017 21:50

Just RTFT (bit of cheeky AIBUing before bed) and cheering you on from here, OP. You did it for your DD and it clearly took a lot of courage. Bloody well done!

Original poster
PastryOnMyMind · 27/08/2017 21:53

thank you all so much. the support from you all gave me the boost!

OP posts:
amistillsexy · 27/08/2017 21:56

Well done Pastry. By the way, it's quite common for fireplaces to be blcoked up with newspaper or similar (foil would work!) And then a piece of card or this plywood to stop the draughts, dirt and even the odd bird from coming down the chimney if the fireplace is not to be used. It's not really an option to 'fill in' the chimney, as it would get damp without air flowing around in there, and the damp patches would come through onto your walls.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 27/08/2017 22:00

Fab outcome POMM. Flowers

Maelstrop · 27/08/2017 22:03

I think you've been brilliant! Really well done contacting the police, I think that was an excellent move. Tbh, I would have pushed them to move the car earlier, they could literally push it into position on their drive regardless of battery, but you have a resolution, so fab!

GiraffesLikeToDance · 27/08/2017 22:04

Well done

TroelsLovesSquinkies · 27/08/2017 22:12

Well done Pastry, they really aren't sorry about what they have done. They are sorry that you were brave enough to call the Police and not let them bully you.
Stay strong you did the right thing.
Fingers crossed that the job interview goes well and you get the job..

MammaTJ · 27/08/2017 22:15

can I confirm that I am just a little bit less wet now? possibly just a damp cloth, or squeezed sponge?

You most certainly can, you are coral, as we are using sea products as an analogy, hard as fuck and really painful if you cross it!!

justilou1 · 27/08/2017 22:35

That's awesome, Pastry!!! Now we need you to get the strength to demand either immediate repairs to your house and garden to make it safe - or compensation!!!

DudeHatesHisCarryOut · 27/08/2017 22:38

Brilliant outcome! Well done you!

(How much do you charge for dealing with other people' CFNs?????)

Slimthistime · 27/08/2017 22:41

OP now that this is getting sorted, just a note re garden
Your contract says you are responsible for the upkeep of the garden but that's the garden as it is
It isn't your responsibility to improve it, in fact the safety aspects should be the landlord's job
Just saying because you don't want to sink a lot of money into someone else's property, they already make a profit anyway.

Re anxiety I first started suffering with that about twelve years ago, taking control of situations helps. Being paralysed by fear seems to make it worse. Medication is also very good, for me anyway.

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