To have refused to remove our coats from free chair in the pub

[user1498921160]

We were out earlier in a local pub for lunch. There was five of us sitting around a table, with our jackets, cardigans, elderly person's walking stick etc on the sixth chair.

A family of four came in and went to a table for four behind us. The daughter, aged about six, put her stuffed toy on one of the chairs and then kicked off that there was no seat for her.

Mother then came over to our table and asked us to move our stuff off the spare seat so her daughter could have it. We pointed out that there was a spare seat at their table and she said 'oh the giraffe is using that chair'. We replied that our coats etc were using our spare chair and she went off in a huff.

WWBU. Obviously, if the seat had genuinely been needed we would have moved all our stuff.

When I say she went off in a huff, I meant she went off muttering angrily and she and her DH shot a few dirty looks over at our table. They genuinely seemed to think we were being disagreeable and unpleasant.

There is a massive difference, the bags, coats etc of 5 people vs 1 teddy. Teddy could be on childs lap easily, or even on the table. 5 coats, multiple bags a walking stick on the other hand, much more in tbe way. Teddy wasnt a necessity, bags coats and a walking stick are.

YANBU (Awwwww clearly is the mother who asked you!)

Clearly it would be unreasonable if they needed it for an actual person!

Anyway the giraffe should have been in a highchair surely?

I wouldn't have peed on a kid's play for the sake of putting a coat on your chair.

But surely the OP wasn't taking a chair from another table to accommodate their things .

We are raising a generation of kids who get their own way far too much . Kids are so entitled.

That was at the OPs table so no you were definitely not being Unreasonable to not move your things .

aww has a point the chair belonged to the pub not you. So it was a chair not belonging to you holding your precious items that you wouldn't move for a 6 year olds item.

Yes but since when has a coat been a person. .

Must be me. Its gotta be.
I'll get back in my box.

Actaully scrap that.
I've completely changed my mind

But why should we have Bizzy. Five adults, including a disabled elderly person, who were halfway through their meal all having to start moving coats and bags, finding somewhere to balance the walking stick etc so that one child could have a chair for a stuffed animal?

YANBU, OP. Children need to learn they can't always get what they want, especially when it inconveniences others around them.

For a person - yes.
For a stuffed toy - no.

How PFB. I think I'd have burst out laughing.

So it was a chair not belonging to you holding your precious items that you wouldn't move for a 6 year olds item.

Give me one good reason why she should.

Unless it's a real giraffe, in which case, you wouldn't really argue would you.

"You're having a giraffe aren't you?"

When I said "I probably would have done the same" I meant the same as you, not the huffing woman - just realised there's room for misconstruction there!

But I wouldn't have asked in the first place, that's ridiculous levels of indulgence. Giraffe would have been sat on a lap or the table, not on a fecking seat that some human needed.

And no, a coat is not a person, but neither is a stuffed toy.

I'd have cleared the chair if it were for a living breathing human to sit on. But being interrupted during a meal for a fucking soft toy - swivel!

To not be a miserable arsehole?

Not indulging a child's every whim is not being a miserable arsehole.

Where do you expect everyone to put all their things, while their dinner is going cold?

I have a 5yo and I’d have told her that giraffe had a choice between sitting on my bag on the floor or sitting on her knee. If there happened to be a spare chair at our table then fine and good. I wouldn’t have asked anyone else for a chair, no way so YANBU. But yeah, you were only doing the same sort of thing I guess. Where would you have put your hats and coats if there had been 6 of you?

Op if I had asked you with the explaination that my DC have autism and role playing with the toy helps her manage her anxiety would you have been considerate and given us the chair?

I've asked the odd person this, or asked if the mind if I swap chairs in a coffee shop as one of my other DC are v obsessed with a particular pattern. No one ever seems to mind but I am very open about explaining their disabilities.

I don't think it's ur to not give it to them under your circumstances but i likely would have as I'm aware not everyone is comfortable being honest about disabilities and it allways is at the back of my mind that it could be because of reasons similar to my kids.

It's not about being a miserable arsehole though, is it? It's about not being interrupted during a meal, to move a bunch of stuff, for an entitled child and a TOY. I had many imaginary friends and "real" toys as a child. I was also taught to respect other people.

If the chair was for another person, that would be different.

surely giraffe was too little for a seat of it's own

That's what I thought shoofly - should either be on someone's knee or in a highchair with a plate of mashed acacia leaves within easy reach.

I agree, Gone. If it was for an issue surrounding disabilities, she should have explained and asked nicely. Then I'm sure OP would have been more accommodating.

Your stuff was there before giraffe arrived so tough titties.