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Original poster

There will be no progress until we name the problem

327 replies

TinyRick · 17/08/2017 14:06

worldnewstrust.com/there-will-be-no-progress-until-we-name-the-problem-mickey-z

AIBU to think this article should be shared far and wide?

There is a real problem with Male Violence being swept under the carpet and not addressed fully on news sites and papers.

If we don't say what it actually plainly is then we can't address the real problem.

OP posts:
Original poster
TinyRick · 17/08/2017 15:27

To be frank worridmum I don't give a shit that some women steal.

We have bigger fish to fry. Classic derailment.

OP posts:
worridmum · 17/08/2017 15:27

Ok justifications for women stealing, biologically humans are primates and male brains are hardwared to be more desiposed to violence as before evolution of culture men were the defenders etc so thats why they commit more violent crime there brains are wired that way oh wait thats no excuse to commit crimes and no justification of them.....

Original poster
TinyRick · 17/08/2017 15:29

If 2 men on average were murdered EVERY week by their partner you god damn well know we would hear about it.

But we don't. Hrmm...weird, huh?

OP posts:
TheSparrowhawk · 17/08/2017 15:30

Worrid - this is a genuine question. It's a fact that the vast majority of violent crime is committed by men. What is the problem with us noticing that? Are we supposed to ignore it?

Papafran · 17/08/2017 15:30

From research by Caldwell et al (2012) on intimate partner violence:

For example, Phelan
and colleagues (2005) found that 70% of female
victims in their sample were “very frightened”
in response to physical aggression from their
partners, but 85% of male victims endorsed “no
fear” in response to IPV. Similarly, in the National
Violence Against Women Survey
(NVAWS), women who were stalked were 13
times more likely than men who were stalked to
be “very afraid” of the stalker

birdsdestiny · 17/08/2017 15:30

The reaction you get when naming this is astounding. It makes people very uncomfortable. That usually means we are on to something.

TheSparrowhawk · 17/08/2017 15:31

It is weird isn't it Tiny, that all those women are murdering men and nobody notices it, while men keep getting caught for murder all the time.

TheEgregiousPeach · 17/08/2017 15:31

Worridmum what are you talking about?

VikingVolva · 17/08/2017 15:32

It's not derailment. It's simply looking at a less narrow set of crimes.

You cannot control how a thread on the internet goes, and it's up to the poster to decide what is relevant.

Because not everyone will agree with you about the need to see this through the prism of sex, rather than through the prism of crime.

And that doesn't make someone an MRA, though it probably does mean they're not RadFem

Original poster
TinyRick · 17/08/2017 15:33

Ahh. Men are just wired that way! They have male brains!

Phew! We can just allow them to keep up their violence then..it's in their nature. Nothing to worry about. Let's just carry on.

OP posts:
worridmum · 17/08/2017 15:33

I am not arguing that i am just getting annoyed with people say its men thats the problem no its not men thats the problem it violence that is.

We need to examine why the violence is happening rather that saying its men that are the problem

TheEgregiousPeach · 17/08/2017 15:33

Worried- sorry if my last post sounded abrupt, do you mean men are biologically predisposed to violence?

TheSparrowhawk · 17/08/2017 15:33

Even though the reaction annoys me, it's totally understandable. Women have been so well trained by men to be subservient that even when men kill and rape women in the millions, women will still say 'don't hurt men's feelings.' At the root of that, of course, is fear of the very violence that women are denying - we don't want to hurt men's feelings because we know exactly what happens to women who hurt men's feelings. They get taught a lesson, pretty damn quick.

sunshineintheclouds · 17/08/2017 15:33

Haha ok

TheSparrowhawk · 17/08/2017 15:34

So worried, should we just ignore the fact that the vast majority of violence is carried out by men?

sunshineintheclouds · 17/08/2017 15:34

Violence and abuse does not just mean murder Hmm

TheSparrowhawk · 17/08/2017 15:35

Oh so it's only violence and abuse women carry out at the same rate as men is it sunshine? Not murder?

worridmum · 17/08/2017 15:36

That is NOT what i meant i was attempting to say excuses are not justifiable as someone was attempting to say women steal lie and cheat for reasons a,b,c and so its ok.

I was showing how stupid it is we need to look at the causes of violence rather then just say meh its a male problem

Original poster
TinyRick · 17/08/2017 15:37

Viking It kinda is derailment when the thread was specifically about male violence and someone interjects with 'but what about women thieving'.

That's not what this post was about.

OP posts:
Papafran · 17/08/2017 15:37

We need to examine why the violence is happening rather that saying its men that are the problem

Sorry, but what the fuck do you think people are doing on this thread? The fact is that the majority of the violence is perpetrated BY MEN. Why is that happening? Because we live in a culture and society that normalises a lot of male violence- eg we have people like you saying that men are hardwired to be violent.

In order to find out why the violence is happening, you need to find out who is committing the violence and then ask why they are doing that.

To say 'the problem is not men, it's the violence' is idiotic. Violence is not a 'thing' that exists separately from human beings. What we are talking about is not 'violence' but 'violent people'. Who overwhelmingly are male.

TheSparrowhawk · 17/08/2017 15:37

Well clearly one of the causes of violence lies somewhere in being male because most violent people are male. How can we tackle violence if we completely ignore such a big fact?

sunshineintheclouds · 17/08/2017 15:37

I said it may well be the same rate, as edited in my post after realizing my typing error.
My point is that man do not have the confidence to report abuse that is done by the hands of a women. So I don't trust data that I know is not a true reflection on dv.

worridmum · 17/08/2017 15:39

Yes there a numerous studies to suggest that biologically they are more predisoped to it BUT a big BUT this is NOT justifying it as we are more evolved and should control these impulses.

Look at other primates behaviors and see (humans are primates btw)

TheSparrowhawk · 17/08/2017 15:40

'Yes there a numerous studies to suggest that biologically they are more predisoped to it BUT a big BUT this is NOT justifying it as we are more evolved and should control these impulses.'

No one is justifying anything worrid.

Papafran · 17/08/2017 15:40

I said it may well be the same rate, as edited in my post after realizing my typing error
My point is that man do not have the confidence to report abuse that is done by the hands of a women. So I don't trust data that I know is not a true reflection on dv

So, how come only you have this magical insight into domestic violence that is not reflected in the statistics or the research that has been done on the issue? Please enlighten us on your special skills, sunshine