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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be angry at DH? *Title edited by MNHQ*

152 replies

gertiegildergoesbananas · 16/08/2017 19:12

I work full time but had taken a day's leave today as it's been mega stressful recently (miscarriage and a LOT on at work) and I wanted to spend a day with my son.

Anyway, I went out this morning to run errands with DS who's 3 and had taken chicken out to defrost for dinner at about 11am.

Came back later, tried to tidy up and get house organised.

DH came in and started to prep dinner and chicken hasn't defrosted through! He's just walked out in a huff and has gone to get himself dinner and hasn't even asked if I'd like anything. He'll probably sit at McDonald's and come back quite content and I'll be starving and I'm bathing DS and will be putting him to bed. I know there will be a chorus of "oh but just text him!" But surely it's rude to just leave someone dinnerless.i realise in the grand scheme of things this is a non problem but it's just selfish.

OP posts:
KeepCalm · 16/08/2017 20:32

What a prize wanker he is Angry

JaneEyre70 · 16/08/2017 20:39

So you've had a trying time of it, gone through a miscarriage and he behaves like that towards you? I'd be questioning why I was with someone so utterly selfish tbh. That's pretty fucked up behaviour Sad

WhatWouldGenghisDo · 16/08/2017 20:40

OP, please come back and tell us you've managed to get something delicious and really fucking expensive to eat??

BananaThePoet · 16/08/2017 20:46

How horrible. I don't think he is your friend. Your husband should be your friend. You need to be your own friend and think about how to make your home life happier and better for yourself. That isn't being selfish - it is being sensible. It isn't good for a child to grow up with parents who are not friends with each other. For your sake and for your child's sake - something needs to change. Maybe relationship counselling to see if the marriage can be improved for you all. Maybe relationship counselling to work out what Gwyneth Paltrow called a conscious uncoupling? You deserve better out of life. You and your child.

MistressDeeCee · 16/08/2017 20:49

What? His dinner isn't prepped ready and thats enough to make him storm off?! Aren't you allowed to make a timing error? Fuck it...rather than stew I'd have ordered myself a lovely takeaway + wine after sorting the DC and sat there still savouring it on his return. Nice & relaxed. I wouldn't even have the argument. Let him stew then raise it with you if he so chooses then give him what for

What is it with selfish entitled pricks on mumsnet today who can't think of anything other than themselves

Ginlovinglady its akin to being in a parallel universe lately. Men who sulk, men who fuck off to their hobby aka opt out of family life/domestics, men who make an absolute mess then sit in the smelly chaos expecting pregnant wife to sort when she comes home, men who avoid household chores leaving all to DW. I feel like screaming when I read those posts

I HATE the thought of women going into a relationship with some bloke that thinks right, I've got myself a house maid now, she can do it all its what women are supposed to do..

& Im apportioning no blame to women, because these men are very, very good at hiding their real "face" when it comes to this lazy entitled shit. Slob tendencies well hidden till marriage/LTR + DCs = I've got her now she's stuck. In fact some can't even hold out till the DCs come along, their inner slob manifests

Annoying!

DamnSummerCold · 16/08/2017 20:50

As with PP I am so angry for you!

DP can live in a bit of a bubble sometimes; ie: agree for us to meet/go somewhere with friends forgetting that he'd bo away with work...

But something as basic as food...

I've had gastro issues for the last few months totally off food; vomiting for no reason etc. Last week I'd gone to bed early; he woke me up slightly coming to bed apparently I muttered I could really do a McD strawberry milkshake. He got up/dressed and went to 2 Mc Ds to get me one.

A bit extreme; but thats what DP's do they are concerned with their partners welfare.

Atenco · 16/08/2017 20:51

What does this man bring to your life, OP?

ChasedByBees · 16/08/2017 21:05

He is contemptuous and doesn't act like he cares about you OP. What a horrible man.

AlexaAmbidextra · 16/08/2017 21:11

I read so many threads on here that leave me feeling profoundly grateful that I don't have a DH/DP etc. I have no desire for one whatsoever. So many fucking arseholes. Angry

MadameJosephine · 16/08/2017 21:15

Hear hear alexa

OP, he is an utter twat. Do you really want to be in a relationship with someone who treats you this way?

Mustang27 · 16/08/2017 21:16

Seriously that's a really horrible thing to do!!! I'm
Sorry for your loss op I hope things get a bit easier on the work front Flowers

DancesWithOtters · 16/08/2017 21:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TakemedowntoPotatoCity · 16/08/2017 21:22

Crush up some laxatives and rub them into the kebab. I'm tempted to say rat poison instead, TBH.

JimmysMum1988 · 16/08/2017 21:25

Put some laxatives in his drink and when he gets the shits say - oh I'm SO glad I didn't have any now...

StrangeLookingParasite · 16/08/2017 21:37

I'm fuming at him. What a knob

You're entirely justified. He is.
And a fucknuckle too.

Original poster
gertiegildergoesbananas · 16/08/2017 22:33

Oh I'm actually more surprised that I had the titled of my thread changed as "wring his neck" offended too many people.

Are we really that over sensitive as a society that a common phrase causes such consternation???

Jeezo what is wrong with people??

OP posts:
monkeywithacowface · 16/08/2017 22:38

How odd the title has been changed! Especially as there is a thread title AIBU to shoot my friend going on somewhere.

Poor old MNHQ I don't think they know if they're coming or going with deletions/edits these days. To be fair there's no pleasing some fuckers on here.

Anyway what did you eat in the end OP?

dollydaydream114 · 16/08/2017 22:40

What!? "Wring his neck" is a really commonly-used figure of speech. FFS. Please tell me nobody took it literally? Bloody hell.

Original poster
gertiegildergoesbananas · 16/08/2017 22:40

Thanks monkey

I did mention the shoot my friend thread and was told to report it. Since I'm aware of figures of speech and tongue in cheek comments I think I'll pass on that.

I gave him absolute hell when he came in. He apologised and said he shouldn't have done it.

OP posts:
LoyaltyAndLobster · 16/08/2017 22:41

OP couldn't you have just cooked yourself and DS something else to eat or called out for a take away?

Yes he has been selfish but I would rise above it, and probably exclude him from dinner for a few days.

"What's for dinner?"
"Well DS and I are having...."
"What about me?"
"Go and get yourself a kebab"

Original poster
gertiegildergoesbananas · 16/08/2017 22:42

The world has gone completely mad. The reasoning was that if a man wrote it about a woman there would be an outcry.

No there wouldn't....it's a figure of speech!!!!

MNHQ have you lost the plot?

OP posts:
eatabagofdicks · 16/08/2017 22:49

Is this one of those 'my husband is lovely and helpful and we get along really well, but today he did something awful 'and actually he's a prick most of the time

starlingsintheslipstream · 16/08/2017 22:52

I've heard it all now - "wring his neck" is a quaint turn of phrase my grandparents used, along with "box his ears".

ImperialBlether · 16/08/2017 22:55

I've seen on the Sex thread that some men throttle their partners for FUN! And those threads aren't banned.

I shouted "Selfish bastard" when your husband came home with that kebab. I would have thrown it to the end of the garden.

PoppyH56 · 16/08/2017 22:56

He would be wearing that kebab if he'd have done that to me Angry