to ask what's your biggest regret in life?

[EagledWingsofRefuge]

That and have you regretted more things you didn't do or did do?

I have a difficult decision to make and I'm wondering if I make the wrong choice if it'll turn out to be my biggest regret in life. It just made me wonder, what's everyone else's regrets? And are they over things you regret doing or regret not doing?

Staying in an emotionally abusive relationship twice. Should have learnt the first time. First shitty relationship meant I only got a 2:2 degree and I was heading for at least a 2:1. Really regret not speaking out and getting help. Desperate to do a Masters in the future to prove to myself I can do it!

My life philosophy has always been that I would rather regret doing something than regret not doing it.

It's mainly worked quite well, but I regret spending so much time in relationships with emotionally unavailable fuckwit men.

I'm another in marrying the STBXH category (although would have stayed long enough with him for DC's to be born). He is financially, emotionally and physically abusive. He continually puts me down in front of DC. He has had countless OW. Although can't wait for the "main" OW to realise what a selfish so and so he is. She us having an affair with him as her "husband" is selfish. The joke is on her when she sees his true colours! (Which includes another OW at their place of work - although she has moved). I suspect OW thinks she is the "one" and "only" for him. I know how he works and who he targets. (lonely single mums). Unfortunately it is my DC and her DD that will pay the ultimate price for both their actions.

To quote the admirable Hellen Mirren, I regret not having said 'fuck off' more often to some people in the past. Instead of trying to please everyone at my expense.

... but the biggest regret is not ever having seen David Bowie live.

Btw, this thread deserves to be nominated for classics.

I have many regrets and I am sure my super successful siblings have literally none. But I am at a stage in my life where I can maybe go in a new direction, have two lovely kids, somewhere to live. I still have ambitions to travel and learn new things. Life could be worse.

Not learning to ride a motorbike before I got too old and developed a balance problem.

Marrying my ex.

Divorcing my ex instead of hiring a hitman (would have saved me tens of thousands).

Not confronting or exposing my abuser.

I had a pretty bad health scare not too long ago and the only thing I could think of was that I wish I didn't have such a "normal" life. I travelled the world in my early 20s, dated too many people, and almost started a family of my own. I would have given it all up to have a chance at seeing my name at the top of a corporation.

Not many people understand this point of view, sadly. Which is why I don't ever say it out loud.

Like many, my main regret is getting married to the man I'm in the process of separating from.

Very true helen mirren. I should have said fuck off more often

Getting married too young to someone safe then never doing snythjng about it . Picking the wrong degree . Then doing the career related to that degree .

At least sone of you who have married the wrong man have done sonethkng about it- bet you won't regret that x

My regret is not going abroad to work. I was offered a job but my mum (who was on her own) said 'don't leave me' and my newish boyfriend who went on to become my ex husband said the same so I didn't go. Too late now but I wish I had.

Staying with my ex for so long and ruining my teenage years and mid twenties.

Not getting a brace (because of stupid ex)

Not going away to uni (because of stupid ex)

Teaching

Being scared of everything

Losing touch with so many friends

Not spending more time with elderly relatives who are now either too far into dementia to know who I am or who have passed away

Being so arrogant when I was younger. I really didn't know everything already. Now I'm embarrassed and it stops me from contacting people I used to know.

Getting fat. Believing I was fat when I was younger. Actually being fat now I'm older.

That's too many regrets, I think I need to re-evaluate my life.

Sometimes I wish with all my heart that my marriage had worked out. My children and I have just had a lovely little trip together and they've gone to their Dads tonight.
I'm getting used to it but every now and again I am hit with massive regret that i didn't try harder.
My baby stared at me over his dad's shoulder with big sad eyes the whole way to the car tonight.

I regret not having lots and lots of sex with different men. I married very young and have only been with my DH. I love him to bits but I wish I had been as carefree as my sister who seemed to have a jolly good few years shagging lots of men.

Crap a level choices= crap results and pretty useless degree not helped by me having hideous boyfriend during a level years and taking to many drugs- feels like a real sliding doors time in my life that could have closed many future possibilities

Had a children before I should have. I will never regret him but regret when I had him if that makes sense. Now stuck on the rental trap and always skint

Staying in a shit relationship for two years in early twenties.

Not following my true passion for my career but doing something more sensible.

Not researching universities properly and going to a worse one than I could have gone too (got offered a space in a better one but opted for one I a more fun city).

Not spending more time learning more languages.

Worrying too much about what other people thought of me in late twenties.

Working too hars and getting stressed out.

gosh I really have a massive list of regrets and I'm only 35!

I think the essence of all my regrets are: not researching and preparing enough before making decissons and spending too much time and energy on unimportant things instead of what really matters.

I regret taking until my forties to realise that my mother had had a personality disorder which led her to bully, belittle and physically abuse me until I was in my twenties. It would have gone on longer had I not, aged twenty two, finally punched her back after an unusually vicious beating. The resulting fear that thereafter accompanied any close relationship wrecked all my relationships [including those with my children] until I was forty eight, when I met the woman who taught me that I was actually a decent human being.

University. It's not that I didn't enjoy it, but I feel it's been a waste of my time as I could have been working instead.

Not marrying my The One. I thought I was too young at 20, told him it was over and moved on. Every time I bump into him, it pierces me through the heart, he tells me that I was the one that got away, 29 years later, I still love him. We always joke that when our DP's are dead we'll maybe have our time then, but I can't see it happening. :)

I have so many regrets I feel completely eaten up by them sometimes. My main one is not following my head not my heart in my twenties. I'm now still in the fallout from that decision in my 40s, and feel like I always will be.