To not understand why teenagers are said to be quite so expensive

[theduchessstill]

On here I often see it written that having teenagers is so incredibly expensive and I don't understand why.

It's actually getting me quite anxious as ds1 is 10 so the teen years are fast approaching. I followed one of those links people post last week where you put in just your income and how many dependants/adults live with you, and apparently I am better off than 81% of people now but that will plummet to 51% of people when both dc are 14 +. Obviously this is a crude tool, but it has been niggling at me.

Why are they so expensive and are none of the costs balanced by the absence of childcare fees with this age group ? Childcare is easily my biggest cost after my mortgage and I often think I will be better off when I don't need it anymore. Exactly what takes its place? I know food - and am already seeing it with ds1, but food can only cost so much, surely. What else is so expensive with teens? I know I probably sound stupid, but, hey, I want to know.

DS passed his test first time on under 20 hours tuition plus the practice of driving every day, twice a day (rural area, no bus, awkward hours). If he did (invested in) an HGV licence, he would always be able to get well paid work to cover study costs, or at least, better paid than warehouse/retail/bar jobs.

I'm sure they do bratsy but if I was wealthy I'd probably give my DSs more than i do now too, otherwise what is the point of being wealthy? My DC will get whatever is left when we die, maybe I'm being selfish in wanting to see them enjoy what we have while we have it. Of course we are thinking of their future too and as I've said, DH and I were brought up poor, we know what it's like to do without. We never blamed our parents for the things we didn't have because we know they gave us what they could and if they'd had more, they would have helped more. There isn't a right or wrong but I hate meanness for the sake of it.

Totally agree with you sock!! A lot of teens I know aren't keen on driving but we will get my dd driving at 17 and get her a decent car . It's a life skill as far as I'm concerned and will help her in her life .

Teenagers are expensive because a) they are growing fast and eat a lot and b) sensible parents with a bit of money to spare invest in their skills so the children have choices further down the line. That can be a degree, or an HGV licence depending on who you are. If you can't do any of that, and can't advise that this would be a good option and work out a way to get to that goal, then your children have fewer chances in life and will need to be resilient.

Brasty, surely the future of your children is the biggest investment you can make? Even if you don't have a great deal to leave them, no grouse moors, you can gift them a work ethic and the understanding that all work is honourable and dignified? What isn't honourable and dignified is standing around with a hand out waiting to be given what other people work for 40 hours per week.

There are lots of things we buy for our DC that are not essential. Most parents choose (or not) to buy what we can according to our values and budget. Sometimes to improve their opportunities in life, sometimes because we want to.

But the OP asked if teenagers were expensive compared with younger DC. Variables aside I would say yes - because the essentials are dearer.

I have a pre-teen but I don't think it will be much more expensive in a few years. DD understands that she can't have everything she wants. I will continue to buy clothes from Primark. Hopefully I won't spend too much more on food. Entertainment and days out have always been expensive.

There will no longer be childcare costs so not having that bill will easily pay for extras like a phone (pay as you go only) and driving lessons with plenty to spare.

If she wants to buy expensive things then she already has savings in her bank account she can use and if she has very expensive taste she will have to get herself a part-time job or sell her old things on Ebay to make money. I worked from the age of 13. I don't see why she can't do the same.

I was that smug mum who thought her term son was easy. He didn't mind what he wore as long as clean and modern. So brought from primark etc with Costco Nike trainers.

Then he hit 15 and now it's Calvin Klein pants, Armani jeans, the expensive model trainers.

Luckily he has a part time job so I give him the money that I would say was reasonable for clothing and he adds to it to buy what he wants.

But aside from that it's the subs for sporting clubs and the equipment plus extra diesel to take him as well as needing to keep dd (11) entertained while we are hanging around waiting. So breakfast/lunch and sometimes shopping.

Plus he's 6'3 and has size 11 feet so nothing's cheap.

School are always asking for money. £3 for non uniform day £5 'donation' here and there for equipment. ££ for books for GCSEs.

I worked from the age of 13, doing a morning paper round and then shops/fast food restaurants so I paid for all "luxuries" like fancy clothes and consoles myself. I thought that was pretty normal.

I came on to say the same as Unicorn - DS is 15 and 6ft 1 with size 11 feet. Uniform will be from the mens' section and because he's got strapping rugby players' thighs he'll be in decent trousers as cheaper stuff rips.

Shoes, coat, shirts/trousers x 3, and you're looking the best part of £200

£3 for a non-uniform day??? What kind of school is it? It's never been more than £1 where we live. If school asked me for £3 I'd send in £1 with a note asking why it's so expensive.

Those saying they worked from age 13 do know that's no longer legal ?

Ok, let's just say 14 then. Children can start their own mini business at any age they like.

My eldest is 11 so not a teenager yet but my main costs with him are food, clothes and school stuff. I've just bought his secondary uniform so much more expensive than primary.

buttered of course it's legal. There are child actors, they're working You have to apply for a permit from the council that may limit your hours. I had one at 14. I'm only 28.

And to the rude PP. I have children, two of whom are very nearly teenagers.

www.gov.uk/child-employment/restrictions-on-child-employment

You can still work paper rounds at 13, permit can be given by the local authority. Both my teens delivered the local paper 13 - 15. DD took over DS1 round.

NameChanger it's a state grammar school. Ds2 is 20 and went to the local comp and non uniform day was £2.50. The money is usually given to a charity.

SheDone were our sons seperated at birth? mines a rugby player and a boxer. He towers over 5'9 dh and 5'7 me.

And ds only has a part time job as he works for family. Otherwise around here it's impossible for a 15yr old to get work. Hard enough when they are 16. It's sporadic odd day here and there but he's paid well so manages to save most of it. E.g. He brought his Thorpe park annual pass

My teens are very cheap in comparison. They babysit, wash up in a cafe and do get walk to earn the cash to pay for iPhones/luxuries. I pay for essentials plus a few extras - so uniform, food for their cookery hobby, netball matches. We do lots second hand because we like the environmental factor and the fashions are less boring

Why are teenagers expensive? Shoes. Even if you don't buy their trainers, school shoes are very pricey. Uniform gets grown out of overnight, a teenage boy can eat everything in your fridge, not put on a pound and still ask what's for dinner.

Going out shoots up in price as they turn into adults, and fares go up. When they pass their driving tests, you may have to pay for the insurance, and that can be a very nasty shock.

The teenage years can be heaps of fun; teenagers get a bad press but are generally lovely, but I don't know many parents who have found the teenage years cheap.

Hands up who get's their papers delivered now?

Paper rounds in my area area rare and the ones that do exist are near impossible to be completed before school as the houses are so far apart.

DS2's paper round is the local weekly free newspaper which is delivered to every house. It takes up a few hours on a Wednesday afternoon/evening.

My kids didn't have expensive clothes I couldn't afford it the rate the boys grew, they didn't get bullied. Thank God it was just before mobiles, or at least when only adults have them. Even so they don't need £300 phones.

No free newspapers here and paper round is done from a van . Essential for teens around here to learn to drive if possible as public transport is pants .

We don't get a weekly free newspaper.