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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To put big No Wanking signs in my bathrooms?

228 replies

Dragonflycushion · 16/08/2017 12:11

Because I can think of no other earthly reason why DSs (all 16+) would need to spend upwards of 20 minutes under the shower. They are definitely not depilating as they'd all give Mr Tumnus a run for his money.

LIGHTHEARTED

OP posts:
Purple52 · 16/08/2017 21:09

Er. Haven't teenage boys done this since the dawn of time?!
As the irritating sister, my dad always took me away from banging on the bathroom door, telling me "he can wash it as much as he likes and banging on the door won't make him stop washing any sooner".
I was the oldest.
Ridicule is part of growing up in a friendly family. It's banter.
It works both ways.
... I am the oldest sibling.

Cailleach666 · 16/08/2017 21:45

Ridicule is part of growing up in a friendly family. It's banter.

Not in every family I can assure you.

"he can wash it as much as he likes and banging on the door won't make him stop washing any sooner".

Quite grim.
My OH wouldn't speak to our teenage DD like that.
People in bathrooms deserve privacy.

RestingMyEyes · 16/08/2017 21:53

Did anyone watch the episode of Orphan Black where the nun was caught masturbating? I clutched my pearls, I did

I'm on series 2 episode 2 and struggling with this, is it worth carrying on with?

Yes! I've watched it all and loved it, took some time to get going but it's worth sticking with Smile

WhataHexIgotinto · 16/08/2017 21:57

When i read a thread like this I thank the Lord that I was brought up in a family with a sense of humour. DH's family are a bunch of po faced stick up their arses bores (he's the first to say this), but thankfully he's been gradually.unclenching over the years and can now see that life shouldn't be taken too seriously.

DorisMcSweeney · 16/08/2017 21:58

If you want you son to stop wanking in the bathroom, just put up some prints of nice family portraits. That should do the trick.

Cailleach666 · 16/08/2017 22:18

Why the need to be so uptight about what a teenager does in the bathroom?
It's totally their own business- I wouldn't give it a second thought.

gamerchick · 16/08/2017 22:23

If you want you son to stop wanking in the bathroom, just put up some prints of nice family portraits. That should do the trick

Heh I wanted to suggest a personalised shower curtain with pictures of parents all over it but was worried I'd get my head kicked in Grin

JennyBlueWren · 16/08/2017 22:39

DH used to spend a long time in the bathroom to avoid his parents (I can understand why)! He didn't masturbate (for bizarre reasons) but of course that's what his parents though.

maximus55 · 17/08/2017 07:45

maximus you win 'strangest post on he thread

Well, to say "ladies don't do that" is ridiculous. Example: After my divorce 25 years ago, I was living in bedsits till got a settlement on the marital house. One was big house with five of us in. Two males including me, and obviously three girls. One night, around one in morning, could hear this moaning and groaning coming from a room next to mine. Like she was having sex? Strange I thought? I knew her BF wasn't there as she was in by herself. From there, used to hear it odd occasions. And she always went to the bathroom the moaning and groaning stopped. I could write a book on my bedsit experiences with mixed male/female occupancy!! Wink

FanjoForTheMammaries · 17/08/2017 08:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

doreen007 · 17/08/2017 09:25

No max. Ladies just don't do that sort of thing

I'm with Max here. When I was in the Queen Anne's regiment TA back in the late eighties, our barrack room had 10/12 beds. Could always tell when a QA was having self gratification. Being a light sleeper, not unusual to wake up middle of the night to sound of deep breathing. And I'm not referring to snoringl
Only have to see the bed covers raised in the middle with movement going on below to know what's going on. The offices were very strict to keep the men and women apart. Although we did mingle with men on social nights. So by having a what you refer to as a wank, was the only sexual release some women could get.

GingerBeerDrinker · 17/08/2017 10:03

Do some people not understand sarcasm?

ClopySow · 17/08/2017 11:05

Doreen are you max's sock puppet?

Strange use of itallics both of you.

EllenMP · 17/08/2017 17:37

Good god, leave them alone. At least they aren't getting it all over your sheets. Young men need to masturbate. It's normal and you need to relax and let them have their private time. Or maybe they are just enjoying a relaxing hot shower? Who knows? Please, for your partner's sake, don't push them out of your house by embarrassing them about it.

Tazmum01 · 17/08/2017 17:45

Just want to say that this thread is AMAZING!! I have a 16 and 11 year old DSs and the thought of them knocking one out makes me break out in a cold sweat. They're going to do it, they all do it. My husband does it. I just don't see any evidence of it and I don't want to.
I don't have a pearl necklace, so I can't clutch it anyway.

Thanks for the entertainment, dragonfly!!

Andpppy · 17/08/2017 17:46

I am a man in my 40s and I still spend up to 20 mins in the shower or 40mins in the bath if I can bother to run it. No I'm not fiddling with myself, it's the only place I can get some peace and quiet and think time plus it's warm and cosy. Us men, including those coming into manhood do need to fire watch. Having a long shower or a bath is the modern day equivalent without appearing rude by locking oneself in ones study. I like the drive home for the same reason.

AufderAutobahn · 17/08/2017 17:47

If my Dad had shudder put up signs on the bathroom saying No Wanking my sister and I would have fucking well left home and never come back. Is it normal for a rents and children to discuss each other's wanking habits like this? Like Ellen said, surely they need privacy, leave them alone!

AufderAutobahn · 17/08/2017 17:48

*parents I meant, doh!

Cyc10ne · 17/08/2017 17:54

20 minutes isn't a long time to spend showering. Takes about 15-20 mins to thoroughly wash if you're not rushing. Plus an extra 5-10 mins of just relaxing. 30 minutes is a normal shower time imo.

UsedToBeAPaxmanFan · 17/08/2017 17:57

It's not what my teenage ds might be doing in thd bathroom that bothers me - it's absolutely his right to privacy. But 20 minutes in the shower, using up all the hot water plus the cost of water (we're metred) is no joke. I bang on the door after 10 minutes to tell him to turn the shower off.

There's no way I would allude to whatever he might be doing in the bathroom as I have no desire to embarrass him but I do remind him that there are 4 people in this house and using all the hot water is anti social.

Crispsheets · 17/08/2017 17:58

The irony of clutching pearl necklaces considering the subject matter Smile
I have very matter of fact conversations with my dcs regarding sex and masturbation. And we watch Game of Thrones together Grin

OJZJ · 17/08/2017 17:58

Sorry i am so sad but what does pearl clutching mean?? X

PrincessDorisWindsor · 17/08/2017 17:59

Paxman If you bang on the door after 10 minutes it'll put the poor lad right off his vinegar strokes.

leighb23 · 17/08/2017 18:05

Fanjo - no fucking chance!! Lol

olbndansmummy · 17/08/2017 18:10

Took me til the end to stop sniggering at wank socks!! Can't believe all the miserable folk out there, it's a funny Subject discussed in a funny way. Lighten up peeps

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