Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think Dressing your kids identical a bit tacky?

407 replies

Joannearobbo · 09/08/2017 09:00

My friend has a 12 year old and 2 twin boys (not identical) who are 9 and every day dresses them exactly the same.
Everything is the same..tops/socks/jackets etc
I think it's a bit naff...but each to their own I guess.
What do you think?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
Frazzled2207 · 11/08/2017 07:39

I have boys less than 2y apart and I've never been faced with this because the second wears hand me downs (plus some extra stuff that he needs but it has genuinely never occurred to me to buy two of the same thing).

Family have occasionally bought them matching Christmas jumpers or something and that's the only time they've been matching.

Really don't get how it helps if you're out and about if they're the same. I make a point of getting very brightly coloured coats for mine each winter but it would be confusing if they were the same. And I can just grab a jacket and know who's it is without having to look at it really carefully. Same goes for all clothing.

Tessliketrees · 11/08/2017 07:44

Seems like a lot of hard work.

I would often buy my boys the same thing, after all if I liked something/found a bargain etc why wouldn't I just buy two? I never went out the way to dress them in the same outfit on the same day, I didn't avoid it either though.

I don't think it's tacky. My kids couldn't have been less interested in clothes when they were younger so all this "individualism" thing is a bit odd. It's not like their clothes were an expression of their identity.

emilybrontescorset · 11/08/2017 07:48

I know many adult twins who dress in similar styles with the same hair cut etc. I've always found that odd.

zzzzz · 11/08/2017 08:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lweji · 11/08/2017 09:38

Once you live apart it's easy to get similar things by accident.

It's not odd at all. Same genes, similar upbringing, similar tastes.

EB123 · 11/08/2017 10:07

I don't like it. I have three boys close in age so could easily dress them the same but no chance. The only time they have similar is at Christmas I get them a set of matching pyjamas for Christmas eve.

RudeDog · 11/08/2017 10:11

I know someone with twin girls who won't allow them to dress differently- if something happens to one outfit it gets binned as no matching pair?
The girls (10) want to dress differently btw

I also know someone with a 5 and an 9 year old who insists on matching clothes - it looks ridiculous

surferjet · 11/08/2017 10:12

I think it's lovely if they're all under 7.

thehousethatjillbuilt · 11/08/2017 11:36

The more I think about this thread the more annoyed I feel.

If the kids don't like it and the parent is doing it purely for their own enjoyment then obviously that's not good (in anything really)

But it annoys me that there are people who see me and my kids coming and make judgements about ME based on what they're wearing. Assuming I'm selfish or whatever.

My elder son REQUESTS to dress the same as his twin brothers and that his twin brothers dress the same. Now the twins have turned 2 I am trying to give them the option not to if they'd prefer not to, but they all seem happy to match and the 4 year old actively wants to. He says he feels left out and dressing the same makes him feel like he's included.

What my children wear has no impact on anyone else. None. I don't see how it's any of anyone else's business.

Threads like this make me feel embarrassed to go out with them dressed how they feel most comfortable. Someone complimented me on their matching tees the other day and I found myself having to frantically justify it.

I also find myself having to carefully consider the rest of their outfit so that they don't fully match. Not because they or I care, but to avoid being judged. I can't really do much if they're all wearing jeans, but if they have matching tees on and one is wearing navy shorts I find myself having to get them changed if all that's clean for one of the others is navy shorts.

I don't mind putting the effort in to having matching stuff because it makes my son so much happier (plus how hard is it to find three different things that you like equally but as they grow and get more interests I hope they will diverge) but I do resent having to be careful not to be too matchy for fear of upsetting strangers. It's just odd to give that much of a shit about something as inoffensive as three small outfits that happen to match.

Lweji · 11/08/2017 12:28

Just as long as you don't dress them all up in curtains. Grin

To think Dressing your kids identical a bit tacky?
brasty · 11/08/2017 12:38

thehousethatjillbuilt But your kids are very young, that is different and I think it is fine.
But I highly doubt a 9 or 10 year old child actually has the same taste in clothes as a 5 year old. As children get older of course they should be allowed their own taste, within limits, on clothes.
I don't think wearing the same colour matters, as long as the kids are fine with that, but let them develop individual taste.

bellaboo101 · 11/08/2017 14:06

I get what @thehousethatjillbuilt is saying, I think labelling someone or something someone is doing 'tacky' is a little uncalled for.

If kids want to dress the same let them! I work in a dress shop and I had a lot of 15/16 year olds want to dress in the same prom dress as their best friend this year...

Each to their own! Smile

Ecureuil · 11/08/2017 14:11

I agree with @thehousethatjillbuilt too.

goingagain · 11/08/2017 14:22

I have three, aged 5, 3 and 1. The oldest two are often dressed the same, occasionally all three. Much easier to spot in playground. Not a faff. Makes shopping so much easier. The older two love it. I think it looks cute but it won't last forever. When we get to the point that they don't like it, we stop.

EB123 · 11/08/2017 14:25

thehousethatjillbuilt

Dress them how you or they like. I may not like matching outfits but nobody is going to get upset or offended! On the flip side you may not like the way I dress my children but I would never change what they wear because of some random stranger on the Internet.

IroningMountain · 15/08/2017 08:46

But why on earth would you start dressing twins the same? They are different children not clones.

Of course any singletons are going to want the same if the other two are part of a matching clone club. Way to make them feel left out( I too have a singleton and twins). Of course two year olds will want to carry on with what they know.

zzzzz · 15/08/2017 08:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IroningMountain · 15/08/2017 09:09

Even more reason to let hem express individuality when they can.Aside from that primary uniform can vary hugely. One of my dc used to wear something different daily. In secondary they're all desperate to show individuality in any way they can. The US and most of Europe don't have school uniform. Dressing kids identically isn't necessary.

MiaowTheCat · 15/08/2017 09:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Shadow666 · 15/08/2017 09:17

Because you go to the shop to buy winter coats and you find a great winter coat that looks warm and waterproof and it's half price, so it's really so much easier to just buy two the same. Or because people often send you matching outfits as presents. Or because you're a mum of baby twins and you're tired and behind with the washing and the only thing clean is matching.

Seriously, when you are a mum of toddler twins you have bigger things to worry about than insisting they dress differently in case someone judges you as a mother and it's easier to just buy them the same rain boots rather than deal with arguments and tantrums every time it rains.

Plus most twins will find it pretty laughable to suggest they may not develop as individuals if they wear the same color t-shirt.

LBOCS2 · 15/08/2017 09:18

Mostly I take my inspiration from the VonTrapp family singers 😁

Not really. No curtains. But I do dress my DDs in the same if I love the item and it's available in both sizes. And while DSS still tolerates it, they all still get matching Christmas pyjamas. They still enjoy it and allow me to choose which clothes they wear/are bought. At some point it will change and that will be fine too.

MrsKoala · 15/08/2017 09:20

Mine have identical 'soft play and days out where they might get lost' outfits. So i can locate them easily. The by product is they do look quite sweet together. They are 4, 2 and 9mo. Doubt i'd get away with it at 12, 10 and 8 tho.

I do also theme them tho. So all similar colours, stripes, dinosaurs, cars, robots etc.

fromthebreach · 15/08/2017 09:24

YABU. I think it looks lovely, and do it as much as they'll let me, while I can still get away with it! They're young. I think it helps them bond? Either way, they look adorable and if anyone gets offended, that's their right.

IroningMountain · 15/08/2017 09:29

Shadow I have 3 the same age and found exactly the opposite. Finding 3 identical outfits out of my huge ironing pile would take some serious work. We never got given identical outfits,sometimes similar tops with different colours but once they disappeared into the laundry they rarely met up again. Never had a problem buying different anything,different colours at the very least are in most ranges.

IroningMountain · 15/08/2017 09:35

Re shoes we've always had different styles for the very reason of ease. 3 identical lefts and rights would be a nightmare to sort through and grab. I expected them to dress themselves asap,have their own shoes( very important for foot growth) and find said shoes themselves. Finding 2 out of 2 is far easier than 2 out of 6 for a preschooler.