Anybody else on holiday with a miserable bastard husband?

[Nettletheelf]

I seem to have found myself on holiday with Victor Meldrew. Tell me that I'm not the only one.

On a hot Mediterranean island suggested by DH. We return to the UK tomorrow, after a week's holiday. Just him and me: DSD and DSS are too old to go on holiday with us.

I'm 45, he's 52. Both very fit and healthy. Happily married, except on this holiday, when I have been tempted to murder him!

His complaints during the week have included the following:

1. Too hot. We're in the fecking mediterranean in August. Of course it's sodding hot.

1a. Too hot to sleep well, thus making him "a bit grumpy".

1. Beach too sandy (I HAVE NOT MADE THIS UP). Sand too fine and gets stuck to things, causing dismay.

1. Beach, specifically sand, too hot to walk on.

1. Has been "too full" to properly enjoy dinners at range of lovely restaurants.

1. Claimed to be 'delirious with the heat' today after leaving air conditioned coach for two hours in historic town.

1. We went on an organised long walk through an area of outstanding natural beauty, just up his street, I thought. He was disappointed in it. The gorge was "too stony".

1. Following gorge walk, his legs were "a bit sore" when descending stairs.

1. Foreign chocolate not up to UK standards.

1. World heritage site "a bit boring" and "just a load of stones".

10. Doesn't like "being told things by people" i.e. tour guide with expert knowledge of ruins.

Etc etc. I'll spare you the rest.

Is this inevitable? Do they all turn into whinging bastards? We know loads of them, and I always thought DH compared well. He doesn't!

It's enough to put me off going on holiday with him again.

Do I need to put LIGHT HEARTED, LIGHT HEARTED to prevent people telling me that my marriage is over and I should leave him? I have, just in case.

Tell me that I'm not the only one!!

My DP insists on getting some kind of minor illness every time we have a holiday. Nothing serious but just bad enough to wreck everything, like say bad sunburn or an ear infection. I probably should be sympathetic but I just can't help but think what a twat he is.

This is EXACTLY what DP did last year. He even managed to find some European versions of Antique restoration shows and his favourite 'When Trains Attack' and 'Snap. Why Women Kill' type programmes

Oh yes HemanorSheRa identical to my DH. I recently suggested we go off to a Beach Bar for a drink lunchtime for a change. He plaintively says "But I'll miss "Cocina de Limon" (or whatever it's called). It's brilliant, it's like Bake Off but in Spanish"
Bearing in mind he won't watch any cooking programmes at home, why the hell does he want to watch Spanish Bake off?! I just leave him to it!

And yes to the minor ailments. He'll suddenly start limping, or rubbing a mozzie bite with a very dramatic pained expression. I have learnt to totally ignore. It's the only way!

I think it's because our DCs don't come with us now, so it's just him and me and no focus on our kids like it used to be. Mind you, all the kids came with us for 5 days earlier this year, he suddenly became Mr. Action during the day!

My dad is like this....I had sympathy with DM until after the third holiday then I just asked why she bothered to go

Why does anyone bother to engage with MJD at best he's an embarrassingly pompous mansplainer at worst he's living the reaction he gets from winding people up.....can I suggest either way it would annoy him more if he's just ignored

Thank you everybody. Now I know that I am not alone! So reassuring.

Plus I have had a good old laugh at the sea being "too salty" and "too obvious" and sand being "just so sandy".

I get the 'minor ailment' thing with DH too, but I rained on his parade this year by dousing him in DEET nightly.

All the poor chap has to fall back on, now that mozzie bites are no longer an option, is stomach upsets, but he makes them count. One was, he thinks, brought on by calimari being "too curly" and "expanding in his stomach". He even expounded this theory to a waiter in a restaurant. The poor sod (waiter) had to pretend to agree with him.

I started calling my DH Victor Meldrew as he started to become a bit like this, he soon stopped!

Holidays are massively overrated. I'm with your dh. And it's not just age, our 15 yo ds is also locked in his hotel room as we speak trying to avoid the sun/heat and doesn't want to visit temples. And I'm being moaned at in because I'm not lying by the pool all day long.

Mine refuses to do anywhere where there are no pavements. He likes a pavement

Might I suggest that you spend your next holiday somewhere cold?

Definitely yes to the minor ailments thing. But it (seems to be) every frigging weekend that should otherwise be free not just holidays. just ill/damaged enough to avoid actually getting on with anything useful...

My husband is s permanent grump, this holiday has highlighted just how much to me.
I do all the cooking on the camp stove (which isn't easy as being at home in my kitchen) yesterday eve I made a delicious veg tagine with produce bought at the local market and he said he didn't want it (doesn't like veg) wanted the meal if cooked for the kids - plain pasta with grated cheese. He never cooks (hates all veg will only eat cheese sandwiches, chips and pizza) has never made me as much as a cup of tea the 9 yrs we have been together.

He hates sand so would rather go to a theme park in the heat, I love the beach, hate theme parks.

He got angry when I said I wanted to go to the spa on the island we are staying at. "Too expensive" his first wife (passed away) "never did anything like that - she was v frugal"

We never go out as a couple at home because conplains our kids don't like to be abandoned to the care of a sitter.

Honestly? I've had enough of him. Last night I sat in the tent and drunk a bottle of wine to myself (whilst he was in the campervan with the kids - he reads to them all eve every eve for hours)

Okay I agree to ignore every post that
Cheers
MJD writes

And maybe he will FOTTFSOF

badbadhusky I too have had the "sea is too salty" complaint from DD! She was also slightly horrified to find that our pool this time was a salt water one not a chlorinated one.

I remembered another one from my whole family. They complain incessantly about the heat while walking along the sunny side of the street. I don't complain because I'm walking on the other side in the shade.

Oh dear OP! I wouldn't recommend going to the Med in August again. Have you thought about Brighton, lol! NIce stony beaches, rain, wind, no fear of sand, be right up his street!

All joking aside, we once went to Menorca in Aug, never, never again, so hot. DH never gets in the pool usually, he was never out of it, it was cold and inviting to wallow in! Did we argue that week!

Canary Islands in the winter are nice, sensible temperatures and sunshine.

Try to enjoy the rest of your holiday!

Me and DH are both pretty Pollyanna about foreign sunny holidays- they work a treat. He is literally a different person when we go camping though. Victor Meldrew has nothing on him! On our recent trip, his most pressing gripe was that the pigeons were too loud...

Haha Chestervase1, your DP would get on greatwith my MIL she's a fan of a good pavement too!

jules your situation sounds completely miserable. The comparison to his first wife's frugality is just outrageous. I am sorry.

My ex was heavy drinker and all holidays had to take that into account. Drinking started at lunch time - how my heart would sink as he ordered that first beer - then would continue on till complete obliteration by the end of the day. Lots of nipping down to the hotel bar once the kids were in bed and of course he always had to have a night out alone while we were wherever we were, I would lie there waiting for him to stumble through the door in the early hours of the morning. I go on holiday alone with my kids now and it's hard work but utter bliss compared to trying to manage his alcohol intake. One particularly memorable holiday he started drinking the moment we arrived and didn't stop until we got back on the plane, disappearing repeatedly for hours at a time, including whole nights.

Hassled: I too enjoy an overseas supermarket. Highlights being M&S in hong kong and a place in Antigua which sold red snapper to take away. Quite superb.

Cheers,
M.JD

Yet you did not know that the Spar is still commonly found 'overseas'?

Cheers

Mr V Messy

There's a spar just down the road from me, in Cambridge.

Cheers
Ms DLBITSun
(libertine)

My DH has whinged about the heat so much on our last 2 holidays that I left him at home this year and took my DS away on my own. The holiday was far more relaxing. We're now stuck at home in the rain and he's whinging about the lack of sunshine. I can't win!

Cheers!

Fuck. Right. Off.

@DontLookBackIntoTheSun hi, we're just down the road from Cambridge. We have a Spar in our town 😀

I almost murdered my DH with the tent peg mallet when pitching the tent in 34 degree heat.

My husband doesn't do heat. We've never even been abroad it if we're out on a reasonably warm day in the UK there is sighing and wafting and mopping of brow. He is very overweight so losing weight would help a lot but I can't really suggest that without looking a bit shallow!