Anybody else on holiday with a miserable bastard husband?

[Nettletheelf]

I seem to have found myself on holiday with Victor Meldrew. Tell me that I'm not the only one.

On a hot Mediterranean island suggested by DH. We return to the UK tomorrow, after a week's holiday. Just him and me: DSD and DSS are too old to go on holiday with us.

I'm 45, he's 52. Both very fit and healthy. Happily married, except on this holiday, when I have been tempted to murder him!

His complaints during the week have included the following:

1. Too hot. We're in the fecking mediterranean in August. Of course it's sodding hot.

1a. Too hot to sleep well, thus making him "a bit grumpy".

1. Beach too sandy (I HAVE NOT MADE THIS UP). Sand too fine and gets stuck to things, causing dismay.

1. Beach, specifically sand, too hot to walk on.

1. Has been "too full" to properly enjoy dinners at range of lovely restaurants.

1. Claimed to be 'delirious with the heat' today after leaving air conditioned coach for two hours in historic town.

1. We went on an organised long walk through an area of outstanding natural beauty, just up his street, I thought. He was disappointed in it. The gorge was "too stony".

1. Following gorge walk, his legs were "a bit sore" when descending stairs.

1. Foreign chocolate not up to UK standards.

1. World heritage site "a bit boring" and "just a load of stones".

10. Doesn't like "being told things by people" i.e. tour guide with expert knowledge of ruins.

Etc etc. I'll spare you the rest.

Is this inevitable? Do they all turn into whinging bastards? We know loads of them, and I always thought DH compared well. He doesn't!

It's enough to put me off going on holiday with him again.

Do I need to put LIGHT HEARTED, LIGHT HEARTED to prevent people telling me that my marriage is over and I should leave him? I have, just in case.

Tell me that I'm not the only one!!

Thankfully neither DH or I are that keen on holidays!!!

If it turned him into a grumpy bugger I'd never go again.

Almost woke him up shaking the bed with laughter at the failure of the shop to stock potato waffles.

I have one too! Although mine likes to huff rather than actually vocalise what the problem is. Personally I would prefer what your husband does, that way at least you know he is being ridiculous.

My DH wanted to go to the mediterranean in July and I HATE the heat, Solution? He went without me, it was great for both of us.

We have just returned from a little get away in the UK and he has had a huff everyday then blamed me for ruining it. Next year, I'm having a spa weekend on my own!

Is 50 a watershed of narkiness, I wonder? . DP is 48. Don't tell me he is going to get worse? Please!

I know this is bad but DS and me always have a better time when it's just the two of us . Sand too sandy, indeed .

Oh and last year we had the strangest 'discussion' about mozzie bites. He was getting chewed by them.

Me: 'Put some repellent on'.
DP: 'No'.
Me: 'But it'll stop you getting bitten'.
DP: 'I don't want to'.
Me: . 'Well take some antihistamine then for the itching.'
DP: 'OK. If I must.'
Me: 'Stop being a curmudgeonly dickhead'.

Interested to hear more about the onsite SPAR? I've not seen a SPAR shop since the 80s. Are you on a Caravan Park?

Best,
M.JD

Also, the on-site Spar doesn't sell potato waffles. Again, he's 37 This has given me a good chuckle 😂

Oh, mine has been like this for bloody years! I will never forget the time he retaliated on "being told things" (yes, by an expert tour guide) by suggesting a different, and very very very unlikely, alternative meaning to a cave painting, and then not oetting the guide get a word in for above 20 minutes, by which time others in the group were calling out rudely about getting on (and dd and I had shuffled off altogether cowardly like). Not to be persuaded, dh continued to rattle on for the rest of the tour. At the end, dd and I went and hid outdoors while others walked away, we heard such delights as "who the hell was that wanker" and its many variances; someone was nice enough to say "feel sorry for the wife and kid".

Even after everyone else had left, we waited another 20 mins for dh to come strolling out as if he'd had the most fabulous time.

I have avoided anything like it with him since.

I feel I might be starting a similar thread about teenagers on holiday next week...

Haha I sometimes get this (he was great this year)

The best one was the year when he had a tantrum in a restaurant in Italy because all they eat in Italy is pizza and he didn't want any more pizza.

We had been in Italy four days and he had not eaten pizza once.

I sat with the menu and went "look dear there's a salad or they do steaks or a chicken stew or..."

He ordered a pizza.

The girls and I were

Nettle I feel your pain. Last year I spent much of the second half of the holiday looking on Rightmove for houses I might buy as a newly single woman...

Yes we have the heat thing, especially at night. And he likes going on Long Walks, especially if he is with anyone who is hungry, tired or wearing high heels. And he likes randomly dismissing restaurants (although when accused of this said "there's always a reason, I just don't tell you what it is.")

And breathe...

Oh jux you poor thing!

He sounds very annoying
Can you get him drunk?

Best
OneMCP

PS Martin please go away I dislike your arrival on mn and suggest there might be another more suitable site for you?

Off on holiday on Sunday.

on holiday he wants to go to bed at nine, get up at nine for brekkie, go back to bed after brekkie till noon, spend a couple of hours out, go back to bed for a couple of hours late afternoon, then go out for dinner, back to room for nine and ready for bed.

Omg, he'd do really well with my parents, up late, hang round, make it out for meals, then want to go to bed early because they're shit faced, as usualthen start all over again the next day. They wanted me to accompany them to somewhere in Greece for a fortnight this year. There's no way I want to spend two weeks with them, I'd kill them after two days!

If I go abroad, I'd want to explore, make the most of visiting cultural sites etc. I'm very into Greek mythology, not so much lying in bed all day when on holiday!

Just got back.. we're on speaking terms again finally.. just 😡

I've just been asked what time he flight is on Saturday.....for the 8th time!

Holidays in August with all the heat and crowds are idea of utter hell. I do city breaks in August - Berlin last year, was brilliant and not overcrowded because seemingly everyone has sprinted to make up the crowds in the Med. I live in London and it's the same, quietens down over the summer holidays. Beach holidays are for Easter holidays or over the Summer Half Term.

Oh thank the Lord mj has come to put us right!
OP- sil, it's you isn't it?
We are on holiday now, but not gone away. I'm getting the patio dug for week two.

My brother just got back from a holiday with his FIL and MIL. They are in their late 70s. They chose Spain in July. They sat inside the villa with doors closed watching cycling. They wouldn't eat outside because there might be flies!

The drunk plan has been tried. He is too concerned about becoming dehydrated and delirious etc., so the most I have been able to get down him is half a bottle of wine. Not nearly enough!

Glad you get the random restaurant dismissal too, Atthebottomofthegarden. I have often tried to decipher the signs, but there are no common factors.

Martin - you get plenty of Spars in Southern Europe. They are some weird familiar beacon. Actually the highlight of my holiday is usually foreign supermarkets - I bloody love them. If I could spend longer looking at aubergines and the biscuit aisle I'd be less grumpy about the sandy sand.

Can I second onemorecakeplease and also ask Martin to quit it. Dull as.

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow: You're more then welcome but seriously, you don't have to thank me. It's really just about applying common sense :)

Cheers!
M.JD

I had this last year. For a fortnight - in Rhodes. DH hated every minute of it.

This year we have gone/are going nowhere. And the fucker is making wistful noises about how much good his holiday in Rhodes did him last year. He felt a lot better apparently, out there in the sun...having a rest...

Not at the fucking time he didn't.

Me and my DP were delighted to share a poolside selfie on social media, to rapturous envy.

Shame I didn't have my phone handy when he kicked the air conditioning unit and called it a cunt.