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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think family should have shown concern?

183 replies

hustlepyramid · 05/08/2017 10:13

Out for afternoon tea and somehow spilled hot tea on my hand.

I squealed and jumped up. A waitress came over as I was still crying out and took me to a sink where I could put cold water on my hand. I screamed several more times as it hurt.

When I got back my family were all just eating cake and chatting!

I sat down and said "I'm fine."

AIBU or could they have shown some concern?

OP posts:

Mummyoflittledragon · 05/08/2017 17:31

Merchant. I'm fine with what I said. I gave op a perfectly reasonable and feasible explanation of why she may have felt the way she did. And she hasn't been back. So we are now chatting about incidents where we've hurt ourselves and not overreacted. She really sounds like a drama queen. It's not your job to police what others say.

MerchantofVenice · 05/08/2017 17:37

Thanks for explaining that Mummy.

It's not my job to police the thread. It's not your job to chat about incidents where you've hurt yourself. We're just bringing our own little related bits and bobs to the thread.

For me, the most pertinent thing to say related not to OP's original post, but to the nasty pile-on that followed. Is that ok - or are you going to 'police' my input??

MerchantofVenice · 05/08/2017 17:42

And it is nasty to laugh for 6 pages at someone who's hurt herself. You know that. It's just more fun for you to paint me as the boring thread police.

There are ways to tell someone they're a bit unreasonable, but most of these haven't occurred to most posters on AIBU.

oldtrees · 05/08/2017 17:43

hustlepyramid

I'm sorry your family have no manners.

Your only mistake was to post here. Far too many self-important, shallow people hanging about looking for an excuse to put the boot in, in AIBU.

Really fucking unpleasant.

Mittens1969 · 05/08/2017 17:52

It does seem like a massive overreaction to me, sorry but yes yabu. That's the reaction I would expect from my 2 DDs, aged 8 and 5,

I'm guessing you've never had a serious injury.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 05/08/2017 17:53

I'm sorry your family have no manners.

So what exactly do you expe t them to have done?

Far too many self-important, shallow people

I'm not self important or shallow. Nor am I a drama queen.

HTH.

AWendyAteMyFitbit · 05/08/2017 17:55

Are you a red-head OP? I've heard they can have an increased sensitivity to pain .

alltouchedout · 05/08/2017 17:55

OP, I have been known to cry actual tears after stepping on a lego, so I understand low pain tolerance and not being someone who can do silent stoicism. But honest to goodness it does sound like you didn't even try to moderate your reaction (in fact it sounds more like you made a point of being as noisily and obviously 'in pain' as possible), and it seems a little strange to me that you're so very bothered about your family's lack of reaction... which is somewhat odd in itself. Either they are people who pay you no attention and don't show any care, which motivates you to make a minor incident into a big deal, or you routinely make minor incidents into a big deal and demand attention and they are sick of that and dealing with it by ignoring your dramas. Neither of those sounds like a good way to live.

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 · 05/08/2017 17:57

Sounds like they're used to your overdramatic attention-seeking ways. I would have pretended it didn't happen too.

Mittens1969 · 05/08/2017 17:57

I hurt my ankle really badly on a trampoline once, in my 30s. I was on crutches for 3 months. I don't think I screamed once. My BIL's DW said it would probably be all right in 10 minutes. At that time they had 4 young kids, so it's what she would have said to one of them.

But it was soon obvious that I wouldn't be better in 10 minutes lol. I couldn't walk on it at all and it became swollen very quickly.

SpartacusSaiman · 05/08/2017 18:10

Maybe she was being a drama queen, maybe her family are all dead inside

Jesus wept....dead inside? Dramatic much?

SpartacusSaiman · 05/08/2017 18:11

OP, I have been known to cry actual tears after stepping on a lego,

Tbf lego is the devils toy.

Mummyoflittledragon · 05/08/2017 18:11

merchant. I do not consider what people are saying as "nasty" or that they are "nasty blighters" and so forth. The op acted like my 9 year old does although she is now starting to moderate her response to hurting herself. This comes with maturity and hopefully much love and affection from parents. Op put herself on the block and people on the thread are responding in kind. I take exception to the language you used about other posters giving her a ribbing. I'm sorry if you took offence to that and I certainly didn't call you the "thread police", which isn't a nice term so I'm struggling to understand why you are so cross with me.

MerchantofVenice · 05/08/2017 18:12

Well done to all of you who've broken multiple bones without so much as a whimper

MerchantofVenice · 05/08/2017 18:13

But maybe OP was wounded (emotionally, I mean) by her family's complete indifference.

Still, 7 pages of ridicule will have helped...

ButchyRestingFace · 05/08/2017 18:15

OP never came back.

Presumably the hospital put her into a medically induced coma until the swelling dies down.

ButchyRestingFace · 05/08/2017 18:19

She's lucky I wasn't there anyway.

Can't abide screamers/flappers.

I'd probably have eaten her order whilst she was away at the toilet dousing her hand with cold water.

Mummyoflittledragon · 05/08/2017 18:19

Merchant. That's exactly what I bloody said pages back. It's not about the pain. If op can't be bothered to read the thread she started and explain how she feels, she can't expect anything else.

MerchantofVenice · 05/08/2017 18:21

mummy thing is, I didn't particularly take issue with you individually, did? I was referring to the tone of the whole thread - all the piss-taking. Posters were not responding 'in kind' at all, because that implies that the OP started the thread in rhat vein. She didn't. She was quite serious.

I'm not all cross with you - you instantly defended yourself personally from my general complaint. So I wrote back

But you did use the word 'police' - you really did!

Mummyoflittledragon · 05/08/2017 18:22

But I didnt mean it the way you took it. Anyway the op is long gone so let's not argue. Ok?

Zubba · 05/08/2017 18:25

Op, do you have kids? Honest question!
My sister was a ridiculous drama queen around mild pain pre-kids as she'd never actually felt proper pain before. She'd never had a broken bone or any sort of accident prior to going into labour... it definitely snapped her out of it.

MerchantofVenice · 05/08/2017 18:28

Ok! But it seems odd to argue that you didn't call me the thread police (ok, technically you didn't) when you did actually accuse me of policing the thread! Seems an odd distinction...

Anyway, yes, let's not argue. I just have a deep loathing of the fashionable mass pile-ons on AIBU. Not accusing you of anything though!

user1476382353 · 05/08/2017 18:28

I say, WELL DONE.

Those with their legs blown off in the armed forces/road accidents, etc? Not to mention those benefit scroungers, exploiting us with their fictitious ailments.

By suffering as you did (with NO sympathy), you've really shown the lot of them up. Get well soon Girl!

paxillin · 05/08/2017 18:32

Lots of showing off on this thread about how stoic people are... Yawn.

You mean lots of people on this thread don't bawl like a toddler?

pictish · 05/08/2017 18:38

I don't think not creating over a minor burn, screaming and crying, is being 'stoic'. It's being proportionate and...you know...ordinary.

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